“Donovan,” I gritted out, and his smile faltered. A sheepish look took over his features. At least he had the good sense to feel bad about what he’d done.
“Here, let me help,” he said, reaching for the box.
“I got it,” I snipped, stepping inside and pushing past him. I didn’t want or need his help. He moved out of my way, but I nearly clipped him with the corner of the box.
“Emily, wait,” he said, his voice low and pleading. I ignored him, setting the gifts down by the tree. “Can we talk?”
My step faltered, and I considered hearing him out for a split second, but thought better of it. “No,” I threw over my shoulder and headed toward the kitchen to meet my family. If he could pretend like nothing had happened between us for the last nine days, then I could do it for a few hours.
Charlie torethrough her presents like a girl on a mission. Wrapping paper and cardboard went flying into the air, and I had to duck to avoid getting smacked in the face with the Easy Bake Oven cookbook.
Ellie was more subdued, naturally. She was just over a month old, so she didn’t care about the countless toys and frilly outfits she’d received. She was also a little milk drunk from her recent feeding, so she struggled to keep her eyes open while Vance excitedly opened her presents in front of her and held them up on display. Delilah giggled as he tried to engage her, but Ellie’s eyes were heavy and her tiny body was cradled in her mom’s arms. She was primed for sleep.
“Uncle Donny!” Charlie squealed, and my gaze snapped to her. “This is just what I wanted!” She jumped up and down in excitement. In her hands was one of those digital cameras that instantly printed the photos she took. A zing of jealousy sliced through me at how excited she was over Donovan’s gift versus mine. I was the aunt here. Herrealaunt. I knew her better than her dad’s best friend did. Yet she didn’t squeal with glee and bounce around like that when she saw the kid’s oven she'd begged me to get her.
I harrumphed, crossing my arms over my chest and falling back against the couch cushion. Donovan noticed, his gaze sliding to me as his lips twitched with barely contained amusement. My eyes narrowed on him, and he pressed his lips together. I nearly reached for a throw pillow to chuck it at his head, but somehow I refrained. Open hostility would only raise everyone’s suspicions, and the last thing I wanted was for my family to start questioning what had happened between us. I wasn’t ashamed of having a one-night stand—it had actually been quite liberating—but it also wasn’t anyone else’s business.
Once all the presents were unwrapped, the evening began to wind down. Donovan was helping Vance put together some of the bigger toys Charlie had received while I helped put away leftovers and straighten up the kitchen. Once the grandparents left, Delilah turned to me and planted her hands on her hips.
“Spill,” she demanded, and I drew back in surprise.
“What do you?—”
“Cut the shit. What happened between you and Donny? You were staring daggers at him all night, and he looked like a whipped pup.” Stunned, I blinked up at her dumbly. I hadn’t realized anyone noticed the tension between us. I sure hoped Vance hadn’t caught on.
“I don’t know what you mean,” I deflected, then turned back to the cup I’d been drying.
“Nice try,” she said flatly. “I saw him sneaking out of your cabin the morning after the party, so don’t even think about lying to me.” I stilled and nearly dropped the glass in my hands. So much for keeping our little tryst a secret.
I turned and faced her, leaning against the counter with a sigh. “We hooked up that night.” She nodded, giving me an expression that saidgo on. “Then he snuck out the next morning without a word. He didn’t even bother leaving a note.” Her eyebrows shot to her hairline, and her mouth fell open.“It wasn’t like I was expecting him to stick around or for it to become more than what it was, but I thought he’d at least have the decency to say goodbye. It’s like he wanted to pretend it never happened.” That stung more than it should have. I turned away from my cousin to hide the hurt in my eyes. “I thought maybe he’d try to reach out or even explain why he left so abruptly, but I haven’t heard a peep from him. It’s not like he doesn’t have a way to get a hold of me. I’m not some stranger he met at the bar. I deserve a little more courtesy than that.”
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I said with a shrug, the lie tasting bitter on my tongue. “I got what I asked for and nothing more.” The problem was, once I’d gotten what I wanted, I realized it would never be enough.
16
DONOVAN
Iwas an idiot. How I could think that one night with Emily would ever be enough was a mystery. The moment I opened that door and saw those gold flecked eyes, every memory I had of her in my arms came back full force. I wondered if she’d be upset with how I’d left things, and the glare she leveled at me the moment she saw my face answered that question. I’d hurt her; that much was clear. What I was uncertain about was whether she’d ever forgive me. The odds certainly weren’t in my favor considering I couldn’t even get her to talk to me. On the rare occasion she looked my way, her narrow-eyed glare told me everything I needed to know. I was screwed.
“I think that just about does it,” Vance said, hopping down off the step ladder. He’d just finished hanging Charlie’s new pod swing in her room, and she was brimming with excitement.
“Can I get in it now?” she asked.
“Have at it, kid,” Vance said, and she squealed before climbing inside with a book. Her exuberance warmed my soul, and I chuckled. I had no plans for children of my own, but I could appreciate the joy they brought to one's life, and I was more than content to play the role of uncle.
Even though Charlie and Ellie weren’t my blood, Vance was like a brother to me. He’d been my best friend for over twenty years along with Blaine and Garrett, our other two college classmates who rounded out our friend group. Our tight-knit crew was one of the things that kept me from returning to Boston all these years. Even now, doubt crept in when I considered my potential move. I wasn’t sure I could leave behind the people who’d essentially become my family. But this was the future of my career we were talking about. It was the logical next step, a move in the right direction. It was what I’d always wanted.
And then a cute little brunette in an elf costume completely consumed me and made me second guess every plan I’d made. I didn’t know what it was about that particular night that drew me to her like never before. Maybe it was getting to see the lighthearted, silly side to her as she played the part of Santa’s elf. Maybe it was the fact she no longer looked like a sorority girl and was all woman now. Or maybe it was how she no longer tried to conceal her desire for me. It had always been subtle, peeking out just beneath the surface. But that night, a fire lit behind those hazel eyes, and she made it clear she wanted me. Whatever it was, it had made something come to life inside me, and now there was no containing it.
Voices sounded from below when I reached the top of the stairs. Delilah and Emily came into view, the latter bundled up in her coat and scarf. She was leaving, and I hadn’t even gotten a chance to talk to her.
“You heading out?” Vance asked from behind me, and Emily’s eyes flicked up to me. She quickly averted her gaze when Vance stepped around me. I was frozen on the top step, just watching her, trying to ignore my aching need for her. I wanted her so bad I could practically feel the silk of her skin beneath my palms. I curled my hands into fists to mute the sensation. I hadto forget about it, about all of it, if I was going to be able to make myself leave in a few months.
“Yeah, I’ll swing by tomorrow so Charlie and I can bake everyone some treats,” Emily said with a smile. My feet finally started to move as they all bid each other goodbye, but by the time I got to the bottom of the steps, she was out the door.
“I should probably head out as well,” I said, running a hand through my hair.
