“Yeah,” I agreed, not giving a damn about the drink. I just wanted to be closer to her, to soak up every last minute we had together. She let herself into the apartment, and I followed her inside. I shrugged off my coat and hung it on the hook. She did the same after depositing her keys in the bowl by the door.
“Do you like marshmallows?” she asked as she prepared our hot chocolate.
“Who doesn’t?” I asked playfully.
“Right answer,” she replied with a chuckle. “It’s a crime to drink hot cocoa without marshmallows,” she declared, handing me a steaming mug. It felt good against my still cold hands. We sank down onto the stools at her kitchen island and sipped our drinks. “Tell me more about this job,” she requested, so I filled her in on the details. Even though our conversation was cordial and she seemed to understand where I’d been coming from when I left the way I did, I still felt the need to explain myself and my motivations.
“When I snuck out of your bed that morning, it was because I’d gotten a text from Vance asking if I’d made it home safely, and I panicked. I didn’t want him to find out I’d spent the night with you,” I explained, guilt prickling my skin. It didn’t matter that she was a grown woman; he saw her as a little sister, and I’d gone behind his back and hooked up with her. Consideringmy stance on relationships and my status as the consummate bachelor, I didn't think he’d appreciate that too much.
“I needed to get out of there before he saw my truck still parked at the cabin, and I knew If I’d woken you, I never would’ve been able to leave. I would have ended up back in that bed with you, and it would’ve complicated things even more. I didn’t leave a note because I was afraid it would give you false hope that it could turn into more, and since there was a good possibility I’d be moving in the spring, I didn’t want to start something that couldn’t go anywhere.” She nodded solemnly, her lips curled inward over her teeth like she was holding something back. I just prayed it wasn’t tears.
“It was shitty of me,” I acknowledged. “And you’re right. I should’ve just talked to you about it. We’re both adults and could’ve handled having a mature conversation, but I wasn’t thinking clearly and made a bad judgment call. And for that, I am deeply sorry.”
She blinked up at me rapidly like she hadn’t expected that explanation, but I owed her the truth. “Thank you for apologizing and being honest with me,” she said, then cleared her throat, straightening her shoulders. “I’m really glad we were able to clear the air. I wouldn’t want something like this hanging between us, especially with you leaving soon.”
It almost felt as though she was putting a wall up between us, closing the door on what could’ve been, and I felt a tinge of panic creep up my spine. It was ridiculous considering I was the one who’d completely shot down the possibility of seeing where this would lead, and I didn’t deserve having any continued access to her, but damn did it make me wish things could be different.
Emily offered me a smile that didn’t reach her eyes, and the urge to say fuck it had me curling my hands into fists to keep from touching her. “Are you excited about moving back home?” she asked, placing her mug on the island counter.
“Yes and no,” I answered honestly, shoving down the desire to grab her, throw her over my shoulder, and take her to bed. “It’ll be nice being close to family again. But on the other hand, this has been my home for the last twenty plus years. All my friends—my found family—are here. Vance is like a brother to me. His girls are as much my nieces as my siblings’ kids are. It’s going to suck leaving them.”
“I can’t imagine. You’ve built a life here. I’m sure it will be hard to walk away from it.” Emily’s eyes softened with understanding, but her brow was pinched like the prospect of my leaving caused her pain.
“It will be,” I agreed, and something inside my chest cracked. This couldn’t be it for me and Emily. I wasn’t ready to slip back into the role of friends.
Taking a chance, I reached over and grabbed her stool, scooting her closer to me. I needed to touch her. I needed to see if she’d open her arms to me again, even if I could only hold her for a little while.
“My time here is rapidly dwindling. I need to make the most of the time I have left.” My legs brushed against hers, and her body instinctively leaned into mine. She turned to me, bringing our mouths closer. Only inches separated her lips from mine.
“What did you have in mind?” she asked in that breathy tone that made my dick stand at attention.
I stood, knocking my stool over in the process, and picked her up. Setting her on the island, I stepped between her open thighs and tangled my fingers in her hair.
“This,” I answered before crashing my lips down on hers. She moaned into my kiss and wrapped her legs around my waist. Her kiss was sweet, like chocolate and sin. I wanted to drown in it, to get lost in her and never be found again.
Cupping her ass with my free hand, I tugged her closer to the edge and pressed into her. She let out a whimper whenmy erection ground into her. Her body felt like heaven pressed against mine. Her scent and taste wrapped around me until she consumed my every sense.
I pulled back, studying her face as I searched her eyes for any signs of hesitation. “Are you okay with this?” I asked, wanting to be certain we were on the same page. “This can only be temporary, and it won’t go anywhere after I leave. I won’t do the long-distance thing, and I’m not cut out for a serious relationship.” I’d tried it once and failed spectacularly. Never again.
“Yes,” she breathed, and my eyes fell closed in relief. “I want this just as badly as you do, and I can handle this having an expiration date as long as I know when it is.”
“One month,” I proposed, thinking on my feet. “Long enough to get our fill, but short enough nobody catches feelings.”
“Deal,” she agreed, and I wasted no time sealing it with a kiss.
19
EMILY
This was crazy. Had I just agreed to be fuck buddies with my brother-in-law’s best friend for a month?
Yep, and I had zero regrets. I would enjoy this man I’d been dreaming about since I was a teenager for as long as I could have him. My teenage fantasy could be fulfilled while I got dicked down by the only man who’d ever done the job correctly.
Now that I knew where his head had been when he left that morning, I understood his reasoning, and my ire had cooled. I appreciated his desire to keep me from getting hurt, even though he’d gone about it all wrong—and ultimately failed.
This time, we were on the same page. The rules were clear: one month only, no catching feelings, and we parted amicably. Easy peasy.
Except…
