His jaw tenses, his brows coming together, and I can’t tell what he’s thinking.It’s only because I’m looking at him so closely that I see the dimple appear in his beard, just for a moment.The quickest, faintest smile.
Then he turns his head to mine, his gaze impassive.
“I don’t know what happened,” he says blankly.“I don’t remember.”
And I know he’s lying.
18
Kat
The next day went slowly.Classes had been canceled for an official day of mourning over Lotte, so I didn’t see Crane or Brom until I ran into them in the library.It was busy in there since the students didn’t have much else to do, but I managed to sit with the two of them for an hour.We didn’t discuss the ritual because Crane’s voice only works one way and there were too many people around us, but when we left he did tell me that we would meet in a glen in the woods at 3:00 a.m., wearing a robe with nothing underneath, and in order to prepare I was to cleanse myself thoroughly.In his words, my cunt and my asshole should be clean enough to eat off of.
Naturally, that night I didn’t sleep a wink.I kept my eye on the clock, watching as the minutes and hours ticked down to three.I’d had an extra bath as Crane so crudely instructed me to do, but that did nothing to relax me.All I could think of was what was going to happen tonight.
I know blood magic involves blood, so that part has me a little squeamish.
I know sex magic involves sex, and even though I’m fairly certain I’m open to anything, my inexperience might get in the way.I know by now that my trysts with Crane and Brom, and even poor Joshua Meeks, have been varied, but sex magic with two partners at once is beyond anything I’ve ever thought about.
All right, I suppose that’s a lie.I’ve thought about it.I’ve fantasized about it until I was hot under the collar.And, of course, I was partially involved in one last week.But Brom never touched me and he had been restrained.What will happen when he’s free to do what he wants?
Crane is in charge, I remind myself,he’ll keep Brom in his place.
But a sick part of me wonders what would happen if Brom broke free?
At ten to three, I take off my nightgown and drawers so that I am completely nude, then wrap the dark ceremonial robe that students all have around me.Boots are too fussy, but I don’t want to go through the woods barefoot, so I put on my slippers, knowing I am going to damage them, open my window, and steal away into the night.
The damp grass kicks up on my calves as I run across the campus toward the library.Crane had said to go behind the building where the Gothic windows are and walk straight into the woods from there, but with no moon in the sky, it’s hard to see the library itself, and I’m too afraid to light my fingertips in case of calling attention to myself.
But even though I’m entering the woods in the pitch dark, Ican sense Brom and Crane ahead of me.I don’t see the light from their candles yet, nor do I hear them, but my body is pulled forward anyway, their energy calling to mine.
I stumble through the brush, nearly losing my slippers on the bramble and slippery roots, and by the time I see a faint glow up ahead, I know the boys have heard me coming.
Finally, I step out of the thicket and into the mystical clearing.
The glen isn’t very large, an oval shape of grass and weeds surrounded by tall maples and firs, and there’s a circle drawn around the perimeter with white salt.A few candles are set into the grass, flickering at the nexus points of the circle, with Crane’s leather bag open, displaying some books, tiny vials of herbs and oil, selenite and quartz crystals, and two paring knives.
Standing inside the circle, cloaked in the same black robes as I am, are Crane and Brom.With their hoods up and faces in shadow, the only way I know who is whom is because of Crane’s excessive height.Both of them radiate such powerful, dark energy that I feel a chill run down my spine.
“For a moment I was afraid you wouldn’t come,” Crane says in a deep voice, stepping toward me, and in the candlelight, I see the sharp cut of his jaw, the hollow under his cheekbones, though his eyes remain in the dark.“No one saw you, I take it?”
I shake my head.“Not that I could tell.I was very careful.”I look at Brom.“You’re not being restrained,” I note.
“In the circle of protection, he should be safe from the horseman,” Crane explains.
“So you could have drawn a circle of salt around me this whole time instead of keeping me in chains?”Brom grinds out.
A charming smile flashes across Crane’s face as he glances atBrom over his shoulder.“I suppose, but chains are more fun, aren’t they?”
Brom lets out a huff of air, his fingers flexing and unflexing.
“Brom,” Crane chides him.“Put your temper away for tonight.Take my hand.”He holds out his hand for him.
Brom sighs and steps forward, his strong bearded jaw and full lips coming into the candlelight.He reaches for Crane’s hand, and such a simple gesture has my heart doing summersaults.
“The only way this is going to work is if the three of us are a united front,” Crane says, holding out his other hand to me now.“Kat, take both our hands.”
I place mine in Crane’s, and he curls his long fingers around me, holding me tight.I glance up at Brom, and he gives me a nod, taking my other hand in his.Both of their hands are warm and large, their grip strong, and it immediately gives me a sense of peace, like I’m being anchored to the spot.
