When Carole was pulled away by yet another admirer, Swinton somehow managed to sidle up to Adam. “Enjoying your farewell party, Your Grace?”
Swinton already knew the answer. He’d been part of the household since before Adam was born. Life with his parents had always been complicated, but his relationship with Swinton had always been straightforward. He’d known everything about Adam from his first newborn cry to last night’s extra glasses of wine, which Adam had deeply regretted this morning. As Swinton had said he would. He was butler, he was father figure, he was a thorn in Adam’s side. And positively irreplaceable.
Adam sent him a sour look. “Shouldn’t you be minding the door?”
“We can’t fit anyone else.” Swinton’s expression was pleased. “Everyone is already inside.”
“Fair enough.”
Swinton glanced over his shoulder. “Miss Quincy is looking lovely tonight.”
“She’s always lovely,” Adam answered automatically. He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her all night.
Her hazel eyes were especially bright tonight, her lips as kissable as ever. The edges of her sunlight-colored gown were decorated with tiny yellow rosebuds at the arms, hem, neck, and under-bodice, making five golden rings of—
“Ha,” he told Swinton. “Very humorous.”
Swinton looked back at him innocently.
Adam deeply regretted his drunken confession about the fortuneteller and following the signs. “She said I’d seefivegold rings. Not one hundred and five. I’m far past that amount, which proves her wrong.”
“Or it proves you’re too stubborn to take a hint,” Swinton said smugly, and melted back into the crowd before Adam could respond.
Washe missing his best chance at happiness? He hadn’t wanted to reduce Carole to nothing but a temporary lover, but nor had he made her a better offer. Would he?Couldhe?
What would New Adam do?
New Adam wasn’t shy and awkward but bold and confident. New Adam wouldn’t waste time wooing the wrong women when the right one was there in his sights. When it came to choosing a wife, the only preferences that mattered would be his own. So what did he truly desire?
He didn’t just want Carole to be happy. He wanted to be the one who made her happy. The one who stood at her side, no matter what. The one she loved, as much as he loved her.
Equal parts fear and panic twisted in his stomach. His chest tightened until his galloping heart threatened to break free. His palms were clammy; his throat too dry to speak.
Being in love wasn’t the end of the world, he promised himself. Neither was being shy. But he’d vowed not to hold back with her. Not after all this. He’d never forgive himself if he didn’t seize the opportunity to be completely honest with her, come what may.
And they had a good thing, did they not? No—agreatthing. A splendid thing. Spinsterhood was unnecessary. Marriage was a huge step, but worth the leap if they could take it together. Surely she’d see that.
Maybe she’d see that.
He squared his shoulders. Old Adam would not have tried to win the hand of the girl of his dreams because he knew he’d be too shy to succeed. New Adam would probably always be awkward at such things, but he was going to try anyway. There was no one else he’d rather spend the rest of his life with.
It was about time he let her know.
Chapter 15
Carole’s cheeks ached from the effort of maintaining a happy expression. She hadn’t stopped talking and smiling for hours. Introducing her favorite people in the world to Adam should have been a joyful occasion, but instead she felt like an automaton; performing exactly as she was programmed to. And it was her own blasted fault.
Adam hadn’t sprung this party on her as a surprise. He’d been candid about his reasons for visiting the village she called home since the beginning. She’d volunteered tohelphim, for the love of crumpets. They both understood the game.Shehad been the one to try and change the rules with an intimate encounter on top of his sofa.
Him gently refusing to complicate something simple had been the right answer. The only answer.
Just look at this party. A roaring success! He wasn’t standing in the corner glaring wordlessly at his guests, but mingling. Conversing. He’d even played half of a billiard game with Lucien le Duc before so many people crowded the room as to make wielding a cue impossible.
She’d liked Adam from the first, but now he was even better. More engaging, more magnetic. With or without deep pockets and a fancy title, when he returned to London for the Season, ladies would be lined up at Almack’s to waltz withhim.
At least she wouldn’t be there to see it.
Carole turned back to the party. She could cope with this. She’d prepared for this. It was what they both wanted.
