“No one.Nothing.”Nicholas leaned back.“Have you found a bride yet?”
“I’ll make my inquiries when they regain consciousness from swooning.Witnessing so much rakish presence in one room must be exhausting.”
Nicholas frowned.His brother’s mouth might have curved in jest, but there was no humor in his eyes.
“I’m sorry,” Nicholas said contritely.“I didn’t mean to distract the ladies.”
“You never mean to.It’s what you do.”Chris shrugged.“It’s fine.I’m used to it.”
Nicholas glanced about the wide chamber.
Dozens of startled gazes immediately swung away, followed by a rustle of whispers.
“Five quid says they’re working up the nerve to talk with me.”Chris took a sip of his ale.“In order to beg an introduction to you.”
A rock formed in Nicholas’s stomach.“The sort of woman who would be interested in me is not the right bride for you.”
“Even the sort that wasn’t previously the sort, turnsintothe sort after she sees you,” Chris said and finished his ale.
Nicholas slid the empty mug away from his brother.“How many of these have you had?”
“One,” Chris answered.“I’m not sotted.I’m bored of living in your shadow.I am ready to take a wife.But you are the worst person to have along when a man is out bride-hunting.I give up.”
“You can’t give up,” Nicholas said in horror.“You’ve always wanted to get married.”
Chris toyed with his empty glass.“It’s not as easy for me as it is for you.I can’t walk up to a stranger and start talking.”
Balderdash.Nicholas tried to understand.“Because you need a formal introduction first?”
“Because I don’t know what to say.”
“That’s a lie.You’ve made more friends in the week we’ve been here than I’ve made in the past year.”
“I’m not looking for friends,” Chris muttered.“I knew you wouldn’t understand.How has your morning gone?Have you been forced to commission a new bedpost to mark your conquests on?”
Nicholas tilted his head uncertainly at his brother.“You never seemed critical of my choices before.”
“I’ve been critical of your choices since I could talk.”Chris arched a brow.“I’m always telling you to stop wasting your time with the wrong women so you can find the right one.”
“You never seemedresentfulof my choices before,” Nicholas clarified.
Chris shrugged.“You never paused your conquests long enough to notice.I haven’t figured out why you’re still sitting with me right now instead of sweeping one of these fine maidens off for the best hour or two of her life.”
Did he truly seem that cavalier?Nicholas swallowed a lump in his throat.The answer was clear.
Even at Oxford, the only times he and his brother saw each other were in social situations.Whenever Chris wasn’t in class—or being dragged by Nicholas to some soirée or another—Chris was more likely to be found on a roof staring up through his telescope.Or staying up all night with the rest of the Junior Astronomers Club in hopes of glimpsing a shooting star or a new comet.
Or whatever aspiring astronomers did.Nicholas had no idea if comets and falling stars were the same thing.
He had his own interests.Interests he’d been too embarrassed to share with others.His brother knew, of course.Family was different.But even still, Nicholas had been happy to let everyone else believe he spent every possible moment dedicated to the fine art of wenching.
What had started as a convenient lie quickly took over his life.
Back at Eton, Nicholas had become the rake he’d pretended to be.And then he began to enjoy it.To revel in it.He liked the rules, the lines.“One night” was easy to understand.Fun.Predictable.Safe.
Becoming a rake had rescued him when he was adrift without direction.It had given him someone to be.Rules to live by.One night was not enough time to get to know another person.Not enough time tolikethem.To be vulnerable.To have it all fall apart.Being a rake gave him control of his world.
He had never intended to ruin his brother’s life in the process.
