He undid the clasp with reverence and eased open the locket. On the left side was nothing. That space had been reserved for a future family portrait that had never come to pass.
On the right side was his mother. His heart thumped in relief, and grief, and sorrow.
There she was. Smiling. Happy. Her head resting on the shoulder of Benjamin’s father, who gazed at his wife and the baby in her arms with an expression of such love it took Benjamin’s breath away. This was his family. All that was left of them.
“Is it as Your Grace remembered?” the jeweler asked softly.
He feared his throat too tight for words, so he gave a short nod instead.
“These last few years, Mr. Marlowe never let it out of his sight,” the jeweler murmured. “He said it was the last portrait of his daughter.”
Fury, hot and sharp, bubbled inside him. “It was the only likeness of her I ever had.”
Grandfather’s constant refusal to return the heirloom had been like being denied his family all over again.
Why could they not have shared her? Benjamin had offered to compromise. It would have cost so little to commission an artist to create a copy of the portrait. Grandfather had dismissed the plea out of hand. Once he’d gained possession of the locket, he’d ceased acknowledging Benjamin altogether. His fingers shook at the injustice and rejection. Why did he have to lose so that his grandfather could win? Why could they not have been family to each other?
His vision blurred as he gazed down at his smiling parents. They had loved him unconditionally, then been stolen first by God and then by a grandfather who loved toplayGod with others.
Love was dangerous. It was out of one’s control. The more one cared about another person the more likely they were to be ripped from one’s side. The only way to protect himself from hurt was to focus on the things he could control. Leave Cressmouth. Encase himself in ice. Dedicate himself to his country, not love.
There was no need to fear the title dying out. Thanks to his cousins, he already had two heirs presumptive. If he kept his mind focused on nothing but Parliament, there would be no need to fear anything at all.
Love only led to hurt. The only way to ensure he would never again lose someone he cared about was to do his best not to care.
“If you’re satisfied…” The jeweler held out her hand.
His heart clenched. He was not satisfied. He wanted things he could not have. He wanted the emptiness inside to go away.
But he forced himself to hand back the locket. “How soon after the ceremony may I have it?”
“Immediately after the bottle breaks,” she said. “Shall I prepare a cushioned jewelry box for travel?”
Benjamin shook his head. “I’ll wear it home.”
He was never losing contact with his family again.
Chapter 9
Benjamin awoke long before dawn. Confirming the locket’s existence had only caused the hours to stretch out that much longer. This was his last day in Cressmouth. His last day with Noelle.
His appointment with her wasn’t for two more hours. He’d broken his fast, dashed off a handful of letters and responses, and was now far too restless to stay cooped up in his old bedchamber. A place he would be leaving behind for good this time.
Perhaps one last walk about the castle would put the strange sensation in his chest to rest.
He stepped out into the corridor just in time to glimpse his cousin Nicholas arriving at the landing.
Nicholas leaned against the balustrade and waited for Benjamin to approach.
“So that’s where they stuffed you,” Nicholas said. He gestured down the opposite corridor. “Mine’s that way. Stunning view from the mountaintop. Have you seen the horizon at dawn?”
Benjamin lifted his brows. “You are just getting back to the castle?”
“I’m just returning to my guest chamber,” Nicholas clarified with a wicked smile.
“‘Saint Nick,’” Benjamin muttered. “A rake to the core.”
Nicholas’s smile only widened. “It may be cold outside, but inside…”
