It’s the same draw I feel for him, but that’s the problem.
“I thought…” he begins, then stops. His jaw tightens, and he swallows whatever fragile hope was about to escape.
I shift, not knowing how to ease the weight in the air between us. “That I’d choose you to travel with?”
His eyes flicker, just once, but it’s enough.
My voice catches, and I force myself to hold his gaze. “I couldn’t. Not because I don’t feel the draw, butbecause I do feel it. Too much. You make me want to disappear into something I don’t understand yet, and I can’t afford to do that. Not now.”
He nods, just barely before turning on his heel.
“I’m around if you need me.”
Then he’s gone, vanishing into the trees without another word.
The silence stretches around me and Torryn again, but this time, it doesn’t feel as heavy with the weight of expectations that still lingered in those men.
I take a deep breath as Torryn gives a single shake before flopping onto all fours. His large head swings to look at me before nudging me gently.
I blink. “What?”
Another nudge, but firmer this time, before whipping it back toward his shoulder.
“Oh,” I murmur. “You want me to…right. Okay. This is happening.”
I rise, brushing soil and petals from my skirt, and hesitate only a second before reaching out. His fur is coarse and warm beneath my fingers, and when I swing a leg over his back, it’s with all the grace of someone very much not trained to ride a wolf.
“Sorry,” I mutter as I shift my weight, trying not to fall off before we’ve even moved. “I don’t think I’m usually this awkward. Then again, I don’t know if I’ve ever done this before. So maybe I am.”
Torryn chuffs once as he lifts to his feet and myhands tighten in the fur on top of his neck. He bolts forward with no warning. A startled laugh tears from my throat as my legs instinctively tighten around his body and I lean into the motion. The world rushes past us in a blur of color and wind and sound.
Cool air sweeps across my skin, stinging my cheeks and stealing my breath.
Every muscle ripples beneath me with power, fluid and steady. His breath is even, confident, as if carrying me is as natural as wearing his own skin.
I grip a little tighter, leaning into his warmth as the hush of the night settling in cradles us.
For the first time since waking in this world, I don’t feel lost.
I just feel…in motion.
Moving forward along a path I chose.
That, more than anything else, feels like freedom.
I curl closer to his back as the wind cuts sharper, but I don’t loosen my hold. I don’t close my eyes. I want to see it all as the world opens in a way I haven’t seen before.
Trees stretch tall on either side of us, their limbs tangled, streaking the ground with the light catching their patterns. I catch glimpses of life between the trunks–deer bounding through the dark and birds chattering as they burst into the sky.
All of it settles into my mind, like I know it all intimately. Each animal name comes to me with ease–fareasier than each item in the interior of the wraith’s castle did.
Torryn runs like he belongs to the land. Each stride is sure and deliberate, as if he knows each section of the forest floor intimately. He runs without hesitation and with purpose.
I can’t help but wonder what it must feel like to be so certain of your place in the world.
The air grows thinner as we climb, the scent of damp moss and mountain wildflowers being left behind. The first rays of moonlight catch on the surface of a river as we pass.
I exhale slowly. There’s no council watching. No shadows curling around my ankles possessively. No frost, or fangs, or arrogant smirks.
