Her cries grew louder, and her breaths came in thick and fast. Tears burned the rims of my eyes as I felt the raw emotion radiating off of her.
“I love him, Alina,” she muttered, her voice trembling and barely audible through the emotion that wracked her body. Tears streamed down her face as she pulled back to look at me. “But I never told Drake because he’s never approved of anyone I’ve been with before. He always finds some fault with them and tries to drive them away until I eventually give up on them.”
Having family members who loved you deeply was a different kind of burden that no one really spoke of. Those who loved you the most always thought they knew exactly what was best for you. Sometimes their expectations for you were unattainable and suffocating, though, and you have to make the choice to break away from them.
It felt like a full circle moment for me, having a similar experience with my own family. The expectations of me to be the perfect heir, the best slayer in my class, and to have a forced marriage. I wanted to say that I would have broken free of it, but if they were still here with me, I don’t think I ever would have. Even now, I still wanted to make them proud. It’s why I was pushing myself so damn hard to fulfill my blood oath.
With a last, shuddering breath, Lo’s sobs subsided to quiet tears. My heart ached for her as she continued, “I didn’t want that to happen with Rin. I wanted to be selfish for once and do what felt right, without anyone else’s opinion muddying my feelings.”
Reaching out to brush the tears off her cheeks, I said, “You have to be true to your heart, Lo. No one else has to live your life besides you. You can’t live it for other people, no matter how much you love and respect their opinions.”
I knew Drake only acted out of love for her, but he was to the point of smothering her now. She was a strong woman now and didn't need him to protect her or fight her battles anymore. Evidently, convincing him of that was going to prove to be difficult.
“I know,” she choked out, her lips pinching. She heaved a heavy sigh before she asked, “But what if he played me and is using me? Everyone else seems to see something that I don’t. I saw the way you and Drake looked at each other during our meeting with him and when Heather said he was a person of interest. What if this is just another moment for Drake to say, ‘I told you so’ about my bad taste in partners?”
A crease of worry spread across her forehead as she searched my gaze for answers to the doubt that I heard creeping in her voice. My gut was telling me that her emotional reaction to this situation meant this was the first time she was even thinking through her own suspicions—suspicions that the man she had grown to love had been playing with her emotions all along.
I swallowed hard, unsure of how to answer her question delicately. My lips parted as I took a deep breath before finally responding, “I think that love can be blinding. It’s overwhelming and beautiful. We want to see the good in those we love, always, because to think of them any other way is heartbreaking. In your heart and soul, do you think Rin could be on Jeoffrey’s side?”
Her lower lip wobbled as she nodded, tears renewed as she whispered, “Yes.”
I didn’t expect that level of transparency, but damn was I proud of her. How did we move on from here in regard to him, though? Her love for him wouldn’t just disappear overnight, and I didn’t want to put her through more pain.
“What do you want to do about this?” I asked, voicing my inner conflict. “I’ll support you in whatever you decide, babe.”
She’d stood by my side, loyal and steadfast since the first time we’d met in the kitchen. I’d repay that in whatever way I could right now. If it meant going toe to toe with Drake over what we were going to do, I’d do it. She needed my support and love more than ever.
Lowering her head to my shoulder, we sat in silence for a long moment before she quietly admitted, “I don’t know, Al.”
“We’ll figure it out, I promise.”
Chapter23
ALINA
Ifelt my eyelids growing heavy with fatigue as I stumbled to my bed, legs trembling like jelly. The day had been a whirlwind, both mentally and physically draining. From the business meetings to the emotional rollercoaster with Lo and Rin, to training with Lincoln in the evening after Lo needed some time to process it all…I felt like I was close to breaking point. As I slid beneath the satin sheets of my bed, I felt the softness envelop me in a comforting hug, finally allowing me to relax.
“Fucking hell,” I muttered into my pillow as I stretched out on my stomach, allowing Andrei to climb onto the bed and throw his leg over me before sitting back on my ass to get the vantage point he needed. “Today sucked.”
“You know it won’t always be like this,” Andrei reassured me as I felt his large hands come down to massage my shoulders through the long t-shirt I’d donned for bed. “Emotions are running high, but we’re getting closer to the answers we need.”
I felt his near-constant anxiety and fear for his mom bleeding through the bond but appreciated that he was doing his best to try to stay outwardly positive for us all in this shit situation.
A moment later, Lincoln settled on the mattress at my right side, his weight causing a slight dip in the bed. “And Drake will come around. I know he’s been sulking somewhere all day, but he’s not a complete idiot, unlike I previously thought.”
Normally his attempt at a joke would have brought a laugh out of me, no matter how obvious it was that he was just saying it to make me smile. I knew he didn’t ever think Drake was an idiot. A calculating, cold bastard? Yes. But an idiot? No.
My eyes fell shut at the mention of my third mate. I hadn’t seen him since he’d left Lo and I in the meeting room. Thankfully, he’d left the bond open between us, so I didn’t feel completely shut out. While we didn’t talk directly, I could sense his confusion and the pressure he felt to make decisions that were for the good of the group while not hurting any of us in the process. The worst part for him, though, was how awful he felt for not providing Lo the space to feel like she could share personal details with him anymore. I hadn’t actively told him what happened during our conversation, but he seemed to be able to pick up on my thoughts and infer for himself what his sister was feeling.
Please come to bed, Drake.
I’ll be there soon, Comoara.
Relief flooded me, and I relaxed under Andrei’s touch. I wasn’t sure how long he would need space to work through it all, but I wanted them with me—I needed a moment to have them all with me and relax. Tomorrow would bring a lot to our plates, of that I was sure. There was still so much to unravel and so many decisions to be made. We still hadn’t managed to pull anything from Silvyn, whatever drug she was on had a serious extended effect, and I wasn’t sure what Drake wanted to do about the other board members we were suspicious of. Everything was bound to come to a head tomorrow when the witch came to pull Jeoffrey’s location from Silvyn’s head.
“You did great during training today, Spitfire,” Lincoln praised in an effort to change to a light topic of conversation. “We just need to work on you not fighting the instructions Devorare gives you, but overall your speed and agility have already improved drastically with the connection.”
Yeah, listen to me. He’s growing on me for that spot of favorite mate.
