Cordova nodded. “Yes, sir. I’ll begin making the necessary arrangements immediately. What about the transfers?”
Noah closed his eyes for a second. “You have my permission to provide generous transfer packages for members of 15. You work with Fitzpatrick for contingency statements in case McClunis doesn’t come back and 15 remains closed. And, Eric, refer to them as women, not ‘girls.’ And do not identify anyone by their ethnicity or sexual orientation.”
“My apologies, sir.” Cordova took his leave.
Noah was certain Cordova would merely refrain from doing it within earshot of Noah. The old guard had to be handled with care. They weren’t ready to accept their changing reality, and Noah had to coach them through it.
But now he wanted to punch something. Within one month, everything he’d spent three years building threatened to split apart.
He had time to course correct though. Firehouse 13 had a proud history of accepting women, and Erin would do well there. She’d probably miss 15 some, but that was how things went. The thirty women in Rescue Alpha depended on him to honor his word to them. Cordova could sell the huge contribution of Rescue Alpha to the acting ER chief. Dr. Ryan Yates would lend his support to the senior ER attendings.
Noah allowed a few moments to reexamine his personal involvement in this. The reality of the situation was that Noah couldn’t be involved in any decisions related to Erin’s firehouse. Nor should he ever be in direct command of her. The more intermediaries he kept between the two of them, the better it would be.
She’d brushed off the gasoline incident, but if he hadn’t appointed Cordova to 15, it would have been Noah in command, placing her in danger. He would be making life and death decisions that involved his secret girlfriend. Eventually, Noah would find his judgment compromised.
He couldn’t afford it. If Noah were ousted from his position as Chief, Rescue Alpha and every woman in the department would suffer. When he took over, he’d made several key promotions, but none of his supporters would have a rank high enough to maintain his programs. The Powers that Be had taken a risk with him and if he were exposed, then they wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. Someone like Cordova would be appointed Chief, and that would be the end of his initiatives.
The best option was to break up with Erin. It was the right and honorable thing to do.
But he couldn’t. He wouldn’t.
She was becoming as necessary to him as food or air. His brain kept flipping back to her smile this morning when she attached his key to her keyring. The happiness he felt, the joy, he hadn’t even known it was missing until he found it.
There was only one way out of this. The one option for them to be together publicly, and the one she deserved. Rodriguez and Clarke had provided the answer. The single elegant solution involved a ring of a different type – the one no one could fire them for without violating state law.
This was not the time for that step. She’d surprised him by agreeing to be his girlfriend. Or secret girlfriend since he opted not to remind her of his upcoming department obligation to appear single for a magazine.
For now, he could simply enjoy being with her, living in the moment the way she did. They would eventually reach a point where they were ready to discuss their future. He could let Abby meet her via video chat and show off how Erin had scrubbed away the dusty unhappiness in his house. Noah could be content with her snuggled in his arms, sleeping like the dead with her mouth adorably open. She fit in his arms, in his bed, in his life.
Cordova had been the one to come up with the changes at 15, so let him handle it. Noah didn’t want to close 15, but it might have to be done.
Hopefully, Erin would understand. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, right?
Always a lot easier to say when someone else was in the ‘few.’
Chapter 40
The holiday schedule came out it on short notice. Chief Cordova sent an email explaining their firehouse was being assessed for remodeling, sensible considering their staffing issues. Erin was glad she was paired with Theo for weekday twelve-hour day cross-coverage at Firehouse 13, ‘The Luckies.’’
They were a different breed. Lieutenant Kwon was far more intense at her home firehouse than she had been at 15. She and her captain ran a tight ship. Too tight, in Erin’s opinion, based on the resentment Erin caught from Kwon’s shift. Erin experienced it firsthand when Kwon gave Theo and Erin an EMT proficiency exam before assigning them to Medic. There was no reasonable explanation for Kwon to require that of them beyond wanting to show her team how high her standards were.
Erin didn’t envy Kwon’s uphill battle, but she was getting in her own way. While lesbians were treated differently by most men, Kwon overcompensated by acting tougher and more aggressive than the men on her shift. Erin could see she feared any sign of weakness would lose the respect of her team. She pushed them, they pushed back, and the cycle repeated itself. When one of her men called her a ‘dyke,’ she coolly made the entire team do fifty squat thrusts. Erin didn’t condone his behavior, but there were better ways to unite a team than against their officer.
Captain Isaacs wasn’t going to fix it because he encouraged competition between individuals and each shift. Competition was well and good if it kept people sharp. In this case, it was leading to infighting.
Fortunately, Erin had a solution.
Basketball.
She brought a basketball to work and began drilling against Theo during their downtime. Within the first hour, they were approached on each shift and some version of the following would occur.
“Do you play a lot of basketball at 15?”
“Nah, Lieutenant Knight is too competitive, and she can’t dribble or shoot. She’s hell with a soccer ball.” Erin would say, passing the ball back and forth with Theo.
“I’m pretty good with my dribbling.”
Erin would casually pick up her basketball and spin it on her finger. She tossed it in the air and caught it, still spinning. “I’d love to have another person. Want to play?”
