I couldn’t help thinking that if our first passionate night together hadn’t had such life-changing consequences, Willow might have been the woman to make me second-guess my determination to avoid commitment before graduation. She was easy, fun, and so intelligent that we never ran out of conversation.
But what ifs were pointless, I told myself sternly as my teammates assembled in formation for the next play. The fact was that Willow was pregnant, and I hadn’t changed my mind about my goals. No matter how attracted to her I might be, we weren’t destined to be together.
So for the next hour, I did what I did best: I pushed away every possible distraction and concentrated on being my best. I stutter-stepped backwards and let the ball fly, watching it land in Hayward’s waiting hands. I ran a few plays and then pointed out gaps I’d noticed in our defense, repeating the plays until I couldn’t get through.
By the end of practice, I was sweaty and exhausted, but I also felt more settled than I had since learning that Willow was pregnant. I sprinted into the locker room with my teammates and got showered, enjoying our usual trash-talking, insult-trading post-practice noise. Even Coach’s continued grumpiness couldn’t take away the sense that we’d really gelled today, that we were more than ready for our next game.
My cheerfulness faltered slightly when I heard Coach Casey call out my name from the doorway of his office.
“Lassiter! A word before you leave, please.”
All of my paranoia came rushing back.He knew. Somehow, he knew.
With no little effort, I nodded, waving to Coach so he knew I’d heard him. “Sure thing, Coach. I’ll be just a minute.”
He nodded and disappeared back into his office. I sat down on the bench to tie my shoes just as Norton came over with his towel around his waist.
“What’s Coach want with you?” he asked. “You two have been real chummy lately.”
I shrugged, unable to meet my friend’s eye. “No idea what he wants right now. But I’m the quarterback, and he’s my coach. So, yeah, we talk.”
“Huh.” Norton dropped the towel and reached for his boxers. “Maybe you can figure out how to get him out of this mood. He about ripped me a new one today, and I wasn’t the only one. Not like we’re playing bad, either.”
“No.” I smiled as I stood up. “You’re right—we were on top of it today.”
“Make sure you tellhimthat.” He jerked his head toward the office.
“Sure. I’ll definitely do that.” I smacked my roommate on the arm. “Don’t wait for me—not sure how long I’ll be.”
“Okay. See you back at the barracks.”
I grabbed my duffel bag and knocked on the door jamb of Coach’s office. “Sir? Did you want to see me?”Please don’t know about Willow.
“Yeah, come in, Lassiter. Have a seat.” Coach was sitting behind his desk, and he swiveled toward me.
“Yes, sir.” I dropped my bag next to the chair, sat down, and waited.
“Good practice today, Lassiter.”
“Thanks, Coach. Yeah, I think the guys looked good. It felt like we really got it together today, you know? I think Saturday will be the kind of day we like around Michie.”
“Let’s hope so. I could use some positive news.” Coach looked grim. “I wanted to talk to you, Lassiter, because I thought you should know that I’m not blind.”
“Sir?” My heartbeat took off, pounding almost out of my chest.
“And I hear things, too. Even when it seems like I’m not paying attention, I am.”
Shit. Shit. Shit.He knew.
“I’ve seen what you’ve done with those guys out there. You’ve always been a leader, son, since I’ve known you, but now, this year, you’ve taken it to a new level.” He was silent for a beat. “I came into our practice session today with a shit attitude. I’m not too arrogant to admit that. I wasn’t teaching, I was punishing, just like you were a few weeks ago.”
I wriggled in my chair, uncomfortable with both his praise and his admissions. “Sir, I—”
“No, no, Lassiter, let me finish. I got on your ass when you were hard on the team. I should give myself the same lecture. I was chewing out everyone, but I saw how you reacted—you rallied your teammates and worked with them.” Coach sat back in his chair and rubbed his forehead. “I think I’m going to owe a couple of apologies.”
“No, sir, I think everyone understands. We’re all human. We all have off days every now and then.” I was so relieved that Coach hadn’t called me in here to bust my ass for getting his daughter pregnant that it was easy to be magnanimous. At the same time, guilt made me want to reassure him, too.
“Yeah. I guess so.” He picked up a pen from his desktop and spun it in his fingers. “Most days, it’s easy to compartmentalize, you know? I can leave home problems at home and team problems at the stadium. But other days, it’s more of a challenge.”
