“Are you anxious to get back home?” She side-eyed me speculatively. “You and Nicky seemed to be quite happy here.”
“Oh, well.” I floundered for a moment. “I mean, yes, it’s been a welcome break from all the wedding pressure. And no, I’m not looking forward to leaving you and the rest of the family. But Nicky has commitments—and I do, too. We all have to go back to real life, I guess.”
“There’s no escaping, it seems.” Honey smiled faintly. “I’m not particularly excited about it myself. I keep coming up with reasons to keep you all here with me. One more meal. One more day.” She gave her head a small shake. “I keep putting off the inevitable moment when everyone is gone, and your grandfather’s loss hits me all over again.”
“I’m sorry, Honey.” I gently bumped my shoulder against hers. “I bet Lisel could stay with you a bit, if you wanted. Or Mama. You don’t have to be alone.”
“Sweet girl, at some point, everyone must resume their lives, and I have to figure out what the rest of mine is going to look like.” She slowed her steps and turned to stare out into the undulating sea. “I lived with that man for fifty-seven years. We were married for fifty-four. I can hardly remember a time when we weren’t part of each other—part of our waking up and going to sleep and everything in between. I wonder if I’ll remember how to be me, without him.”
“Please do, Honey.” I slipped one arm around her waist and hugged her. “Because I’m selfish enough not to want to lose you yet.”
“Oh, darling, I’m not going anywhere. Certainly not before I get to watch you marry the man you love.” She hesitated a beat. “Kyra, you reallydolove Nicky, don’t you? You’re not marrying him because Handsome and I pushed, are you?”
“Good Lord, Honey. No.” I shook my head. “Of course, I love Nicky. He’s the one man I want in my life for always. Like you said—he’s part of me, and I can’t live without that part.” I snickered. “Besides which, you should know better than to think that you could push me into anything I didn’t want to do. I’m a stubborn woman. I get it from my grandmother.”
“I have no idea what you mean.” She sniffed and then winked at me. “All right, then. I just wanted to be sure. I know that what you’re choosing to do in marrying Nicky isn’t easy. I know the whole royal deal has been a steep learning curve. I’m proud of you for handling everything with a tremendous amount of grace.”
“Thank you.” Touched, I kissed her worn cheek. “Honey, you know, you could always come live with Nicky and me in England. The cottage is a bit small, but we won’t be there forever. We could find a perfect little place for you, or we could build you something.”
“That’s a very generous offer, sweetheart.” Honey patted my back. “I appreciate it, and I’m touched. But no, I can’t leave the States. Not when your father and mother and the other girls are here—and my business, too. I’m going to have to pick up the slack that your grandfather leaves.”
“I’m happy to help with that, too,” I assured her. “Don’t let it cause you too much stress.”
“Don’t worry—I know how to work hard, but I also know my limits.” She leaned over to pick up a small white shell, examined it closely, and tucked it into her pocket. “And one of the reasons I plan to pace myself is that there is no way I’m missing your wedding. I can’t wait to see you walk down that aisle.” She nudged my ribs with her elbow. “Want to give me any hints about the gown? Your mother tells me that it’s a closely-guarded secret.”
“It is.” I grinned broadly. “And it’s staying that way. I brought along Sophie when I met with the designer I’d chosen—she’s the same one who did my engagement dress and coat, and she’s a friend of Daisy’s—and I only took Sophie because I wanted another set of impartial eyes. Plus, I wanted to hear how it might play to the press.”
Honey sniffed. “Not that it’s any of their business.”
“True, but it’s a fine line, Honey. I have to play the game sometimes, even if it feels ridiculous.” I shivered as the water rushed up to cover our feet again. “I do it for Nicky. Wouldn’t you have done the same for Handsome?”
“Every time, and then some,” she admitted. “It’s just that I don’t want to see you twist yourself inside out over pleasing a bunch of vultures who’ll turn on you as soon as they don’t get what they want.”
“Youaretalking about the press and not about the Palace staff, aren’t you?” I joked. “Because some days, it feels more as though they’re the ones out to get me.”
“Ah, the interview.” Honey nodded sagely. “Your grandfather was unhappy about the way that was handled. If you want to know the truth, he wanted to fly over to the UK, and in his words, give some of those morons what-for.” Her lips curved slightly. “There may have been some expletives in there, too.”
My heart constricted. “You don’t think the stress of the interview—the fact that I did it—that didn’t cause Handsome to ...” I couldn’t say the words out loud.
“Oh, sweetheart, no.” Honey hugged me to her swiftly. “Not at all. He was mad, but after all those years in business, believe me, Handsome knew how to handle aggravation. He vented and railed to me, and then he let it go, because he knew you were handling it and so was Nicky.”
“I hope it didn’t upset him that I sort of used Honey Bee as a way around the Palace brigade.” I still felt slightly guilty.
“Not a bit. Kyra, that interview was beautifully done, and it focused on the things that our company has always espoused. It’s the kind of piece that I’d hope any of our people would be able to present. You represented us exactly as we’d hoped.”
We began walking again, our steps plodding and careful as the sand was softer here. Every now and again, Honey would find a shell and tuck it away.
“I wish I could find the right way to channel my passion for sustainability and food security into a viable platform,” I mused, pausing to allow a couple of sand pipers the space to run across my path. “Alex is the patron of this amazing charity that helps military families cope with grief and loss. She took something horrible and turned it into a beautiful way to help others. But I haven’t come up with a way to do the same with something I love without alienating people or turning them off.”
“It’s not an easy balance,” Honey agreed. “Once upon a time, I told your grandfather that I was giving up socializing, because I was so excited about what we were doing with Honey Bee that I’d corner people at cocktail parties and make them listen to me proselytize.”
I could totally see that happening. “And what did Handsome say to that?”
A glint of humor shone in Honey’s eyes. “He said I wouldn’t have to give it up ... if I didn’t tone things down, people were going to stop inviting me, anyway.”
We laughed, both of us enjoying the happy memory, even if it was still tinged with the recent loss.
“That sounds like him.” I looped my arm through Honey’s. “We should probably turn back now. We’re nearly at the edge of the beach that belongs to Nicky’s family, and then we’ll be fair game for any reporters.”
