While I was left alone, I took the opportunity to wriggle out of what was left of my panties, wadding them up in my fist. I smoothed my dress back down over my thighs, raked my fingers over my hair and tried to gather what might be left of my dignity before Jake came back.
When he did, awkwardness abounded. He cleared his throat and jammed his hands into the front pockets of his pants. I remembered him doing the same thing that night, just before we’d left the bar together. The stance kind of melted my heart, making me think of a little kid asking for something he wasn’t sure he’d get ... or maybe unsure if he was about to get in trouble for something he’d already done.
“Um, so ...” His eyes flickered up to mine.
“Don’t worry.” I struggled to keep my voice expressionless. “You don’t have to give me the ‘this was a mistake’ speech. We’re on the same page, remember?”
“That wasn’t what I was going to say.” His forehead furrowed. “I was thinking ... you know ... maybe we’re not done. Maybe this is something.”
“Something? What’s that supposed to mean?” I hugged my arms around my chest.
“I don’t know. But maybe like a friends with benefits deal. You know those nights when you’re raring to go, but you don’t really want to hit the bar? You could just call me, and if I was free, we could do ... um, this.” He pointed at me and then at himself. “Take care of what we both need.”
“You mean like express sex? Sex on demand?” I had a vague feeling that I should probably be offended, but actually, I was kind of intrigued.
“Demand might be too strong a word. How about sex on request?” He cocked his head and squinted at me, clearly trying to assess how I was taking this idea.
“Sex on request.” I considered for a minute. “You know, that’s honestly sort of exactly what I need right now. With my schedule, sometimes I need to work off some energy, but I don’t usually have time to get dressed up, find someone half-way decent and hope he’s okay.”
“Right. And we have chemistry, we know what works between us, and we know neither of us is a serial killer.”
“Well, we’re pretty sure. Did you ever think this was a way for me to lure you into believing I’m safe?” I quirked an eyebrow at him. “Maybe the first time was just to whet your appetite. This time was to reel you in. When I get you back home, that’s when the damage starts.”
“Let me tell you something, sugar. If you have a sex dungeon somewhere in your apartment, where you’re going to tie me up and torture me in weird and wonderful ways, then I’m your willing slave.”
I grinned. “I’ll keep that in mind.” I hesitated for a beat. “Are we really going to do this?”
Jake shrugged. “I’m not asking you to sign a contract. We could try it and see if it works for us. If it does, great. If either of us decides we’re not comfortable, then we stop. What could be easier?”
I knew there had to be a problem with this plan, but right at this moment, for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out what it was. “So we’re talking sex, with no strings attached, no feelings involved, no expectations, whenever either of us wants it and it’s convenient for the other.”
“Yep.” He nodded. “And if the other says the timing isn’t right or she isn’t in the mood, no questions asked and no hard feelings.”
Frowning, I rested one hand on my hip. “You mean ifheor she isn’t in the mood, right?”
Jake chuckled. “Oh, sugar, I can’t even begin to imagine a scenario where you make the bootie call and I’m not ready to rock and roll. If I’m not working and I’m still breathing, you can pretty much bank on me to be at your beck and call.”
“But you think it’s different with me?”
“Sure.” He shrugged. “Chicks have moods. Everyone knows that. You have a bad hair day, or it’s getting to be that time of the month, or the cute guy at work flirted with your friend instead of you, and suddenly you’re not interested in sexy times.”
I rolled my eyes. “Oh, that’s not sexist at all. For your information, bud, I don’t have bad hair days, and I could care less if some cute guy flirts with anyone, because when I’m at work, I don’t have time for fucking around like that. Oh, and one more thing.” I smirked, dropping my voice. “When it’s getting to bethat time of the month, I’m horny as hell.”
Jake’s eyes went wide. “Oooookay. Wow.” He swallowed. “Message received.”
“Good.” I pushed away from the wall. “Just one more thing, and then I have to get back inside before Samantha misses me and starts asking more questions.” I fiddled with the charm on my necklace. “Um ... at the risk of sounding presumptuous, is this arrangement exclusive?” When he didn’t answer right away, I rushed to continue. “It doesn’t matter to me one way or the other, but I think it’s important to know. I’m not asking for a commitment or anything like that, but I never ...” I trailed off. “I was going to say that I don’t make it a practice to screw around, but I guess that’s not entirely accurate. For the purposes of whatever this is between us, though, I don’t plan to have sex with anyone else, as long as you’re meeting my needs. And I’d like to know what your thoughts are, because I think having realistic expectations is important.”
“I agree.” Jake rocked back on his heels. “I can say the same. As long as we’re both in the same place and we’re both satisfying each other’s needs, I don’t see the point in looking for anything outside that. Unless you meet the man of your dreams and fall head over heels in love, of course. In that case, all you have to do is tell me. No hard feelings.”
“And what about you?” I narrowed my eyes. “What if you fall in love?”
He shook his head. “Not going to happen. As long as I’m getting regular squeeze sessions from you, this kind of deal could last forever. Or at least until I PCS out of Fort Lee.”
“All righty then.” I wasn’t sure how to seal a deal like the one we’d just made. “I guess I’ll go inside and do the social thing so Samantha doesn’t get suspicious. More suspicious, that is.” I pointed a finger at him. “Because we need to be on the same page here, too. This arrangement stays between us. No kiss and tell with your soldier buddies, got it? And I definitely don’t plan on saying anything to Samantha.”
“None of their business,” Jake agreed. “Oh, but wait a minute. You need to give me your number. Then I’ll text you, so you’ll have mine.” He dug into his back pocket, producing his phone, then unlocked the screen and handed it to me. “Here.”
I grinned a little as I tapped in the information. “Done. Now don’t text me until later tonight, though. I don’t want to have to explain to anyone why I’m getting messages from someone I just met.”
He nodded. “Got it. You go ahead in, and then I’ll circle around and go in the front door in a few minutes.”
I began to turn away, but Jake snagged my arm. “One more thing.” Before I could say anything, he slanted his mouth over mine and kissed me, one fast, open-mouthed branding on my lips.
“This didn’t seem like a situation that called for a handshake,” he murmured against me. “I’ll be in touch. Soon.”
