“It would be impossible for me to take you to just one favorite restaurant.” Quinn grinned at me across the table. “So this is in the top ten. Tomorrow we’ll have dim sum in Chinatown, but it would be hard to talk there. Tends to get a little noisy and crazy.”
I couldn’t complain about the small restaurant she’d chosen, although I did love a good Chinese dumpling. This one, though, was cool in a kitschy, throwback way: it was a little hole-in-the-wall in Haight-Ashbury called Aquarius, and the walls were covered in old stickers and photos from the days of the hippies. Groovy music—or at least, that’s what Quinn called it—played in the background, and the wait staff all looked as though they’d stepped out of a documentary about the Swinging Sixties.
“This one feels very San Francisco.” I took a tentative bite of my black-bean-and-veggie burger, which was liberally covered with sprouts of some sort. It was surprisingly good.
“So.” Quinn crumpled her napkin in one hand and bit the corner of her mouth. “If you feel more comfortable staying in a hotel, I can find you one close by me. Or you could stay with Kara and Allan—they have plenty of room. I just assumed ...” Her voice trailed off.
“Mia.” I reached across and covered her hand where it rested on the table. “I don’t want you to misunderstand me, so I’m going to be as clear as I can be. Brutally honest.” Leaning forward, I lowered my voice. “The minute I saw you on Fisherman’s Wharf, I wanted to throw you over my shoulder, take you to the nearest secluded spot and fuck you until neither of us could stand up anymore. I went so hard that I was in pain all the way to your house. I didn’t go up with you to drop my bag, because I don’t trust myself. Even right now, all I can see is your lips ... and your gorgeous tits under that shirt, moving up and down when you breathe. For months, I’ve been having the hottest, most erotic sex dreams about you. A lot of them are memories of times we really were together.
“Make no mistake, Quinn.I want you.I always have, and I always will.” I inhaled deeply. “But the thing is, Mia, sex was one thing you and I were always really good at. It was never our problem. If we sleep together now—if we make love—it’s going to be fucking amazing. Mind-blowing, without a doubt. But it might get in the way of the other stuff we still need to deal with. And baby, as much as I want you—and I do—I wantuseven more. So I’m willing to suck it up for as long as it takes to make us as strong as we can be.”
As I spoke, Quinn’s face blushed pink, her mouth opened a little, and her eyes dilated. When I finished, she gave a little groan. “When did you get to be so goddamn mature, Leo? What happened to my boyfriend who was down for a quickie under the boardwalk at the beach?”
“Oh, God.” I gritted my teeth, fighting the wave of desire that threatened to pull me down. “Don’t remind me. That’s one that plays on repeat in my head.”
“Mine, too. When I—” She broke off, her eyes dropping to the table.
“When you what?” I raised her hand to kiss the back of it. “Mia, you can tell me anything. You know that. It’s important that we both feel we can be honest with each other. Don’t hold anything back.”
“Okay.” She nodded. “When I was living at the shore with Nate, sometimes I’d go for walks on the beach, if Sheri was there to sit with Nate, or when he was still able to be on his own for short periods. And every time I passed that spot ... where you and I were under the boardwalk, I thought of you. Missed you so much. More than once, I went under there and sat down to cry.”
I swallowed over the lump in my throat. “I’m sorry, babe. I’m sorry you had to go through that.”
“No, don’t be sorry. If we’re going to be honest with each other, then we also have to stop apologizing for everything. The past is done, right? We’re moving forward. When I tell you about that time, I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. And I don’t want to feel guilty, either. I’m tired of that.”
Smiling, I rubbed my thumb over her knuckles. “All right. So let’s review: we’re being honest, we’re not apologizing, we’re not feeling sorry for each other, and we’re not feeling guilty anymore. Does that cover it?”
“For now.” Her eyes lit up. “We should probably agree to amend the rules as we go along. You know ... just in case anything else occurs to us or crops up.”
“So let it be written.” I gave one jerky nod of my head. “And on the topic of where I’m going to stay, I’d really rather be with you as much as I can. I’m not saying that sleeping in a separate room will be easy, and I’m not saying the temptation won’t be excruciating, but you know, they say pain makes us stronger, right?”
“Is that what they say? Then it seems like we should be Arnold Schwarzenegger.” Quinn rolled her eyes. “I want you to stay with me, though. We can sit up late talking, and I can make you breakfast in the mornings. I’ve gotten good at omelets.”
“That sounds perfect.” I released her hand to eat more of my burger. “One thing, though. You cannot tell any of my football buddies that I was eating all this crunchy sprouty food, okay? They’ll never let me live it down.”
She drew a cross over her heart. “Hand to God. As far as they know from me, you ate raw steaks and potatoes the whole time, like the manly man you are.”
“Thanks.” I licked a little bit of sauce from my finger. “Although I’ll admit this is damn good. How did you find this place?”
Quinn lifted one shoulder. “One of the guys who works for Kara and Allen brought me here for lunch one day. He’s third generation San Francisco, and his grandparents were hippies here in Haight-Ashbury.” She gave a little laugh. “Now, of course, his dad is a big shot in the financial district and his mom’s a DA in Marin County, but I guess the hippie gene skipped a generation. Asher definitely is more flower child than yuppie.”
“Asher, huh?” I quirked an eyebrow. “And just how well did you get to know this dude? He took you out to lunch?”
“Yes, he did.” She regarded me gravely. “He’s a terrible flirt, too. And so freaking cute. He’s got these gorgeous blue eyes, and he wears his hair long ... kind of sexy, you know? Unfortunately, he’d be more interested in you than he was in me.” She sighed. “The good ones are all gay or taken.”
I didn’t want to admit how relieved I was. Sitting back in my chair, I smirked a little. “Hey, not all of us. Aren’t I one of the good ones?”
Tilting her head, Quinn tossed me a teasing grin. “You definitely are one of the good ones. So you’re saying you’re not taken?”
I thought for a minute. “I’m not taken, but I’m not available, either. I’m ... reserved for the one who can have me the minute she asks.”
In mock outrage, Quinn threw up her hands. “Hey, I offered, didn’t I? I asked. I’m not the one taking sex off the table, buddy. That’s all you.”
“Mia.” Slowly I wagged my head from side to side. “When I said you could have me the minute you asked, I wasn’t talkingsexually. I meant ... in a long-term, lifetime, forever kind of way. Why does it always go back to fucking for you? Get your mind out of the gutter, babe.”
I could see her trying to be insulted by my teasing, but finally she couldn’t help giggling. “All right, you caught me. I’ll try to be more like you and think higher thoughts.” Her gaze held mine as she lifted up the strawberry from her bowl of fruit. Parting her lips slightly, she slid the smaller end of the red berry between them, taking a small bite. Juice drizzled over her full bottom lip and onto her chin, and her tongue snaked out to catch it.
My dick was straining at the zipper of my jeans, and I wanted to drop to my knees and weep. “No fair, Mia. Not fucking fair at all.”
