Fear of chasing her away because things between them were too fragile kept him from admitting,I’m looking at one of them right now.
The merriment struck her as soon as they exited from the coach, and it only grew after he tucked her hand in the crook of his elbow and led her into the center of things. She hadn’t realized how badly she’d needed to be surrounded by joy and happiness. Even the brisk coolness of the evening couldn’t dampen her spirits.
“I haven’t been to a festival... my word. I suppose it was the last time I was at the country estate before our fateful summer.” After she thought he’d abandoned her, she’d begun referring to it as herfateful summeror herfateful night, but now she knew the terms belonged to both her and Finn.
“When you told me how you spent your time in the country, you never mentioned festivals.”
“I didn’t want you to think I was enjoying myself without you about.”
“Vivi, I didn’t want you to be miserable when we weren’t together. I’m glad you had fun at them.”
“I didn’t say that. I always felt as though something was missing, that they’d have been so much more pleasurable if you were there. Did you come to fetes while I was away?”
“Sometimes.”
With a grin, she nudged her head against his shoulder. “Yet you didn’t tell me about them.”
“I’d come with my brothers. Aiden always managed to find a saucy wench to go off with him.”
“And you?”
His eyes warmed as he glanced over at her. “I was only ever interested in you, Vivi. I told you that. Although if I’d followed Aiden’s lead, perhaps our first time would have been more pleasant for you.”
“I found no fault with it, although I wouldn’t imagine you’ve been celibate since me.”
Slowly he shook his head, before turning his attention back to the crowd. “No.”
“I’m relieved to hear that, Finn. I wouldn’t have liked for you to have been alone all these years. I suspect you really craved the company once you got out of prison.”
“There were a lot of things I craved. Not all of it nice.”
She suspected he was referring to retribution, but rather than hurt her, he’d stayed away.
A man suddenly leaped in front of them and began juggling balls in the air. Finn tossed him a coin. The man snatched it on its descent to the ground, without dropping a single ball. “Thanks, guv.”
With a nod of his head, and the spheres going around and around, he strutted away, gaining the attention of children, making them laugh.
“Wouldn’t the orphans of the foundling home love this?” she asked as he led her deeper into the fray of activity where two men tumbled, one stepping into the locked palms of another who would then toss him in the air, where he’d do a somersault before landing on his feet, only to repeat the process. They wandered by another man swallowing flames.
“Why would anyone desire to do such a thing?” she asked.
“Puts coins in his pockets.”
“Still, the danger of it...”
“I suspect there’s a trick to it.”
“I can’t even imagine the first person sitting around and suddenly thinking,It would be jolly good fun to put fire in my mouth.”
“As baffled as you are by him, I daresay he would be equally baffled by a lady of the nobility deciding it would be a grand idea to wander the streets at night rescuing children.” There was no censure in his voice, but his raised eyebrow did give her pause. But even it wasn’t mocking. Rather she thought perhaps he admired her efforts. Although she wasn’t doing it to be admired, she did have to admit to finding gratification in his approval.
A dancing monkey caught her attention, its owner playing the accordion. Suddenly the little fellow darted over to her, gave her skirt a tug, then doffed his hat. Finn handed her a shilling, and she dropped it into the waiting hat, where it was promptly retrieved and studied. Then the monkey raced to the accordion player and climbed up him as though he were a tree, finding a perch on his shoulder.
“I could do with some food and beer,” Finn said. “Join me?”
He purchased meat pies from a lady at one stall, two tankards of beer from a gent at another, and leased a blanket for three-pence from a young girl who sat near a small knoll, a stack of coverings beside her. Once they were settled, she looked out over the gathering, torches striving to hold the darkness at bay. She felt almost carefree, without worries, without concerns.
“Would have been nice to have been able to do this when we were younger,” he said quietly.
