Her giggle, short and high. “I can’t.”
“Say it or I won’t give it to you.”
“I’ll call that bluff.”
His growl reverberated through his chest and into hers. “You’re right. Why would I deny us both?”
Then the devil in her took hold. “Cock.”
His snarl sounded of victory and surrender as he plunged deep and sure. She cried out at the absolute joy of his spreading her, filling her.
They rocked in tandem, a perfect rhythm quickening in pace until they were both baying at the moon as exquisite pleasure overtook them. All she could think was that she wanted this forever.
He’d seen her every night for two weeks, although when she had a ball to attend, their hours together were fewer. Yet it wasn’t enough. It was never enough.
Whenever they spoke of the future, it was always in the context of his plans, what he wanted to do with his life. Never hers because they both knew what her future held: marriage to a lord, providing him with an heir. The thought of another man touching her would send such despair through him that he didn’t know how he would survive it. He could not help but wonder if it would be as awful for her, if she would close her eyes and pretend that Finn was the one hovering over her, joining his body to hers, thrusting into her, spilling his seed.
He couldn’t imagine having his life planned out for him from the moment he was born. If his father hadn’t taken him to Ettie Trewlove’s door, perhaps it would have been. In many ways, despite his humble existence, he was much freer than Vivi. He could do anything he damned well wanted. And what he damned well wanted was to ask her to do the same, to do what she damned well wanted.
That terrified the hell out of him because what he planned for tonight was going to change everything between them—for better or worse. But he couldn’t go on much longer as they’d been.
As he waited for her, he was constantly wiping his sweating palms on his trousers, for the first time wishing he had a proper pair of gentlemen’s gloves, but all he had were the gloves in which he worked, and he’d never touch her wearing those. So he paced and took deep breaths.
Then she was through the door, and his nervousness increased because she was so beautiful and so refined and so above him, even if she didn’t see herself as such. He loved her with everything inside him and every corner of his heart. It was hers as though she’d laid her hand over it and branded it.
She eased away from the house. “Finn?”
He heard the worry and doubt echoed in her whisper and only then realized he had yet to make a move toward her, as though his feet were permanently rooted where he stood. “Here,” he called out, keeping his voice low, even as he strode quickly to her, possibly reaching her before the word did.
The joy that wreathed her face created an ache in his chest. He couldn’t imagine that anyone else would ever look at him as she did.
Tonight, Sophie was again their means of transport, but as there was no moon, he’d brought a lantern.
“Where are we going?” she whispered.
Every night he’d taken her somewhere different: another rise, a valley, a nearby village green.
“You’ll see.” The answer he always gave to that question when she asked.
The exchange had become one more ritual in an assortment they’d acquired over the past two years.
They didn’t travel far before he brought Sophie to a halt in the mews behind a massive residence. He shoved himself over the horse’s rump and landed smartly on the ground. Walking to the side, he settled his hands around Vivi’s waist, another ritual. Of late, his life had become guided by their rituals.
“Where are we?” she asked, once her feet were firmly on the ground.
“It’s not important, but it has the most beautiful garden I’ve ever seen.” He grabbed the lantern used for thieving with its three enclosed sides from where he’d secured it to the saddle, lit the candle within, and held it aloft.
“You’re not thinking of going in there, surely.”
“The owner is not in residence. Only a handful of servants are about, and they’re all abed at this hour. We won’t be long.” He’d wanted someplace special, someplace that would bring delight to a woman, that would give her a fond memory. He’d considered a park, but many were locked up after midnight and there was no guarantee they’d be undisturbed if he did manage to get them inside. Besides, he’d been able to place a few shillings in the butler’s palm to ensure the gate here was left unlocked and none of the staff would become curious if they saw light in the garden.
Taking her hand, he tried to draw her near, but she resisted. “Finn—”
“Vivi, I have permission.”
“Why didn’t you just say?”
“I thought it would make the night more unforgettable.”
