When Christmas is over, I will write my heart out and not even breathe and not even move, and the only beings I will talk to are my cats, and you will have another book, I promise. I would never abandon you or Roxy Belle.
I will soon be sprinkled in Mrs. Claus’ magic and another book will pop out of me. Who knows? Santa might bring the plot down the chimney.
Yours in T and A,
Bellini
In between planning for the T and A show, working at the bar, taking care of my mother, and two hundred other things I was doing, I tried to think of another storyline for Roxy Belle. I thought of twenty ideas, then discarded them because they were terrible ideas.
I had…
Nothing.
I could feel my nerves becoming more frayed in a literary sort of way. I truly did not want to wreck my writing career. Argh! One more thing to worry about.
22
Bellini
I spent mornings and early afternoons visiting and taking care of my mom, Petunia, Sir Scott, Mrs. Books, and Claws before heading off to the bar. A couple of The Sisters would come and stay with her while I was gone, but I felt guilty for not being there. Still, like she said, she needed someone to run the bar, the coat/hat/glove donations, and the Lady Whiskey’s T and A Christmas Burlesque Show.
“It is a wee bit of work,” she told me on a snowy morning at the kitchen table, holding up her fingers so they were about an inch apart.
I scoffed.
She patted my hand and said, “Honey, I know it’s too much work. It’s overwhelming. I feel terrible about asking you to do this, but there was no one else who can do what I do. And I know that you’ll put on the best T and A Christmas Burlesque Show anyone has ever seen, and we’ll raise a bunch of money for the kids.”
“I’m happy to do it, Mom.” My bones were tired, my body weary, and I wondered how my mother could do all this work—she’s thirty-plus years older than me, and all I wanted to do was nap all day long for about a week. I watched Claws trying to sneak up on a blue ornament that had fallen off the tree.
“I know you’re putting your writing career aside for this, and I’m so sorry. I truly am, sweetheart.”
“It won’t last forever. Everyone misses you, Lady Whiskey.” We clinked our Christmas coffee mugs, as we did every morning. “Cheers.”
A collection of old-fashioned white homes and shops that form a Christmas village were crowded onto her fireplace mantel. Each building had tiny lights inside that made them glow like gold. Above the mantel was a huge pine wreath. The Christmas spirit was here, but I would never fully feel it with Logan near me, but so, so far away. I shook my head. Sometimes my mind says the cheesiest things, but there’s truth in the cheese.
“I know you’re matchmaking, by the way.”
“What?!” My actress-mother feigned outrage, eyes wide, hands to chest. “I would never matchmake. You are an adult, and I leave you up to your own devices, and I don’t interfere a whit. Not a whit!”
I rolled my eyes, and she tried to appear innocent. “Logan called, and as you planned, we’ll be dancing together in the T and A show. Stacy is making me the dress you paid her to make. She did not want my input on the dress at all and told me I was being argumentative and difficult becauseyousaid I was dancing in the T and A show so that was that.”
“My goodness!” This time she mockingly put both hands up in the air, declaring her lack of knowledge. “I am shocked to hear this! Shocked! How could this have come about? It’s like the angels on high flew down from heaven and threw some magical Christmas love sparkles around and about, and they landed on you and Logan. It certainly wasn’t any evil, secretive planning on my part, sugarplum.”
“There might be some sparkles,” I said. “But not the magical Christmas love sparkles you’re talking about.” Unfortunately, there would be no magical Christmas love sparkles that would keep Logan and me together. “You are the magical love sparkles.”
“Thank you, my dear elf.” She wriggled in her seat and stared at the ceiling in a holy manner for a second, as if asking forwisdom and grace. “Perhaps, maybe, I thought a T and A dance between you and Logan might be…helpful. Joyous. Celebratory. For old times’ sake.”
“Elf Mom, I know you had me flying home to Montana to take care of you and the bar, but I think your primary reason was to get Logan and me together again.”
She gasped again. Her eyes flew open wide. She fluttered her hands. So dramatic! “You think I’m that devious, dear? That scheming?”
“Yes, I do. At first, I fell for your cry for help. I even put four screeching cats on a plane for you, but now I know the truth. You’ve been caught, Mom. Red-handed.”
“Hmph.” She crossed her arms, then said, “I should be insulted by your accusation, but I’ll forgive you this one time.” She shook a finger at me.
I laughed.
“Remember you are my life, and I love you.”
