“Nothing,” I admitted. “You don’t need to do anything.” I switched the bottle to my other hand so I could reach over and set my free hand on his.
I linked our fingers together and looked forward at nothing in particular. I felt his thumb trace the side of my finger and took another drink from the bottle. I took a moment to myself, just enjoying sitting beside Asante in the house where we’d made countless memories. I flipped his hand, slid my hand against his, palm to palm and lifted them both to kiss the back of his hand.
He exhaled.
“Shit is going to work out, Bishop.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” He pulled our hands toward him and this time he kissed the back of my hand.
It made me grin.
“There’s no point in stressing about it.” I let my head lull to the side and I looked over at Asante who had his head resting against the back of the seat, his eyes already on me.
“It won’t change anything,” he said softly.
“I know.”
I gave him a weak smile and squeezed his hand. He grinned and squeezed my hand back.
“This is some bullshit.” I leaned forward and set the bottle on the coffee table, toed my shoes off and fell over, letting my head fall into Asante’s lap.
He chuckled slightly but didn’t comment. He just started to massage my scalp. I let my eyes flutter shut while I reveled in his touch, both enjoying how he grounded me and fearing the moment when I wouldn’t be able to just come home and do this.
Home.
I let my eyes open and looked up at Asante.
“I love coming home to you,” I confessed.
“Home, huh?”
“Yeah. When we’re here together it feels like home and when you’re at me and Rook’s spot, that feels like home too. Shit. Anywhere I am with you feels like home.”
“Yeah? Me too.” He looked down at me. “I like when you’re like this.”
“Stressed and trying to get drunk?” I joked.
“Nah. Open and vulnerable and pressed up against me, reassuring me that this is real.”
“It’s real,” I assured him.
“Then, we’ll figure the rest of this shit out.”
“I’m pretty good at running security.”
“What?” Asante chuckled slightly. “I never questioned that.”
“I know.” I let my eyes jump around his face. “I’m just saying, I could find another job. I’m hirable and probably for a pretty good paying job too.” I exhaled. “If shit doesn’t work out,” I added. “If I decide to walk away, I can carry my own weight.” I let out a yawn and my eyes drifted closed without my permission while the weight of this conversation really started to settle on top of me. It didn’t deter me though. It actually shoved me forward, knowing that this, these moments with Asante, were on the line.“I have a good amount of cash saved up from workingwith my family too, enough to either get us a place or pay this one off and still hold us up for a few years so don’t worry.”
“I wasn’t worried,” Asante said simply. “And even if you couldn’t find a job, I’d figure it out, Bishop. Shit. I’d liquidate the club and my half of the shit my sister and I got from my parents and we’d figure it out, even if we had to downsize.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“I love you. You know that?” I forced my eyes open.
