“Yeah, some couple I don’t even fucking know but King thinks it’s a good look for us to be there.” He tilted his head slightly. “You don’t have to lie to me, Asante. We’re bigger than that.“
“Yeah, and your last name is bigger than everything else.”
“It is,” he confirmed without hesitation. It wasn’t said bitterly or defensively. It was a simple response to my statement, a fact that we both knew. “You worried about me getting married?”
“I won’t say I’m worried, but I will say it’s been on my mind more and more now that your birthday has come and gone and this year together just fucking flew by.”
“Yeah,” he sighed. “I know what you mean. If the last year flew by as quickly as it did, the next one will probably go by just as fast.”
“If not faster.” I took a bit of my protein bar.
“So, what’s going on in your head? Where’s it at? You want to cut your losses?”
I chewed as I thought and swallowed before leaning forward on the table.
Bishop asked me that question often, like he thought one day I would just wake up and decide that I wasn’t in love with him, that I wasn’t fucking obsessed with everything he did, like I wouldn’t go off and die in his name like a mindless soilder meant for nothing but his protection.
“Nah,” I said simply. “I don’t want to cut my losses. I never want to cut my losses and I never want you to think that’s what I want, but ultimately we do have to think about how our dynamic is going to change once you get married.”
“The Barron name is as big a bartering chip as it is a hindrance. There’s a woman out there who will gladly marry me and not care what I do as long as I bankroll her lifestyle and let her hang on my arm at public appearances. Shit won’t change that much.”
“You sure about that?”
“Positive.”
“Alright,” I took another bite of my protein bar and let it go.
This conversation wasn’t going to change anything.
There was a part of me that felt weird about knowing that I’d be with a married man behind the scenes, but another part of me was selfish. As long as Bishop was honest with whoever he married and they signed off on it, it was what it was.
I loved him and I was going to take him however I could get him if it came down to that.
Bishop sighed.
“I don’t want you to worry about this, baby.” He said quietly. “It’s going to work out. It has to work out.” He repeated my thoughts aloud and I nodded once. “Shit is changing. My brotheris making the matches for me and Rook and I’m going to sit him down and tell him. We’re good.”
His phone vibrated and he looked down at it. I watched his demeanor shift in real time while his eyes glanced over the screen. He didn’t say anything about the message though. He just turned his attention back to me.
“What do you need to feel secure in this?”
“Nothing.” I took another bite of my protein bar. “I’m secure in you and me. It’s everybody else that’s the fucking problem.” I admitted.
He grinned then chuckled then shrugged.
“You’re right.”
“Yeah, and I know you also have work shit to get done so go ahead and do it.”
“I’m talking to you,” he argued.
“And I’m good. For real. Take it.”
“You sure?”
“I’m positive. We’ll reconvene tonight.”
I knew Bishop and I knew how important his work was. I also knew how important I was to him and the balance he tried to always have between the two. The fact that he was even willing to put his work on the backburner to finish this conversation with me was enough to reiterate that what we had was real and that he’d fight for it if it came down to that.
