“She did,” he said gravely. “I was just trying to read a book in peace at the bar.”
“That’s not even true.” I said quickly, scowling. “It was barely seven pm and you satdirectlynext to me!”
He shook his head, denying my claims.
“There wasn’t even a book, you liar. Just you, me, and a couple of bad drinks.”
Hefinallyshrugged. “Saw a pretty girl, didn’t expect her to have posters of my nineteen year old face all over her bedroom.” His eyes sparkled.
Nadine snorted into her coffee. “You’re full of shit.”
“Iamfull of shit,” Ansel admitted, smiling at me with that stupid softness I still didn’t know what to do with. “But she really did ruin me.”
And just like that, the whole room went quiet. I stared down at my plate. Ruin me.
Nadine cleared her throat. “So, Juniper. Tell me about yourfamily.” It was a gentle question. No landmines, no sharp edges. Just normal curiosity from a woman who might just like me more than she was letting on.
But my stomach dropped anyway. “Oh,” I said. “Um. It’s just me and my dad, really. My mom left when I was four.”
Nadine’s eyes softened. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I said quickly. “I mean — it’s not, but. I don’t know. It was a long time ago.”
“You haven’t seen her since?” She asked gently.
I shook my head. “Not once.” The table was quiet again.
But this time, it was Ansel who broke the silence. “Shit,” he whispered. “I didn’t know that.”
I looked up.
He was staring at me like I’d knocked the air out of him. “I should’ve asked,” he said, turning his entire body to meet mine. “I should’ve — I mean.Fuck. I’ve known you for months, I’ve had you in my bed, in my lap, in my fuckinglife, and I never asked. I’m so sorry.”
My chest cracked. “You don’t have to apologize,” I said, too quickly, cheeks heating.
“I do.” His voice was low. “Of course I do. You know everything about my dad. About the movies. The fallout. And I never — God, June, Icare. Icare so much.”
I opened my mouth. Closed it again.
It wasn’t just the apology. It was the look on his face — like he wanted to climb over the table andholdme.His hand slipped up to my cheek, gently brushing tears from my cheek.
When did I start crying?
“I want to know every part of you, Juniper.” He whispered softly, eyes darting across my face quickly, as if he was trying to read every emotion I’d ever felt.
It was too much.
Nadine, like a saint, stood up. “I’m going to get more jam.”
Neither of us moved.
I looked at Ansel.
And I wanted to say it.
Right there, jamless and stunned, with the morning sun streaming in and his hand sliding into mine again under the table. But the words got stuck.
He’s not Joel, I reminded myself. He’s neverbeenJoel.
