“Yeah…” She exhales slowly. “I just feel really bad for him. I can’t believe you told him.”
“It seemed like a good idea at the time. I really liked him, Jacie. We had such a great date together and he’s funny and awesome and—” I stare at my wrinkled sheets as I sit on my bed. “I’m such an idiot.”
“Did you think you could tell him about the bet and he’d still like you?” she asks. “I’m not trying to be mean, Mae, but I wish you’d asked me first because I could have told you that is a veryverybad idea.”
“Why am I so stupid?” I say, drawing out the words in a long whine. I fall back on my bed and close my eyes. “I’m so mad at myself.”
“I’m sorry, Mae. This is my fault, too. I shouldn’t have made that stupid bet with you.”
“I’m gonna text him,” I say, putting the phone on speaker. “What should I tell him?”
“You could apologize?” she suggests. “How mad did he seem last night?”
“Pretty mad.”
“Then you’re gonna need a really good apology text,” she says with a sarcastic snort.
I tell her I’ll call her back later, because I can tell she doesn’t really care about this as much as I do. It’s not her life, after all. It’s mine. And I’ve just ruined things with a guy I actually liked.
I decide not to think too much about what I’ll say to him, because then it’ll sound rehearsed and fake. So I say what’s in my heart.
Me:I’m so sorry, Jaxon. I really hope we can still be friends.
He doesn’t reply. Not for a whole week. My homework is piling up and I’m pretty sure I failed my physics test today, but I don’t care. It’s been an entire week and I haven’t heard from him at all. I also never saw him in school. He’s become a ghost.
Jacie is annoyed with me for how much I talk about him, and I can’t say I blame her. I stare at my phone and consider sending him another text, but I don’t want to be the crazy girl who dated him on a bet and then texted him too much. But I can’t stop replaying our date in my mind. I think about how good he smelled and how he held open doors and wrapped his arm around me in the chilly night air. That was the best first date I’ve ever had, and yet I ruined it all.
I grab my songwriting notebook and try to put my thoughts into lyrics. But after an hour, I don’t have anything worthy of calling a song. All of my inspiration must have disappeared when I ruined my chance with Jaxon Rhodes.
Chapter 8
A few days later, I’ve finally cracked. I can’t just sit around and wish I was texting him. Clearly, I can’t handle the silence, so I need to text him. I thought I was finally getting over it all, but then I saw him today in lunch.
I was carrying my tray of food over to my table with Jacie, and he was across the cafeteria, walking with a friend. Our eyes met for a second, and he glanced away. But in that second, I could see a sadness in him, one that mirrored my own emotions.
I have to talk to him.
I wait until school is over and I send him a text.
Me:I hate that you hate me now. I never wanted to hurt you. I just started off doing something stupid and then I wanted to make it right.
To my utter shock, he replies almost instantly.
Jaxon:I get it. I do. But I’m the loser who was played, so it’s hard to just bounce back and still be your friend.
Me:You weren’t played, Jaxon. It’s not like I picked you out of a crowd and decided to hurt you. We met on accident, remember?
