‘Not that much.’ I know that for a fact. I had Jill’s barn floor in the outhouse covered for a very reasonable amount.
‘There’s feck all light?’ Dan’s still staring at me but I can see his mind is whirring, his eyes narrow, his brow furrows.
‘Oh this isn’t the place for some gawdy fluorescent light! This is hundreds of white fairy lights all the way. What says romance more than candlelight and roses? This is a unique wedding venue, perhaps the most unique I’ve ever seen in all my years at the magazine. This could be out of this world. Magical. Affordable,’ I say fiercely with total belief in my words.
‘So let’s just say you did ever want to get married, which, by the way, I recall you saying you weren’t the marrying type. Are you telling me you could see yourself getting married down here?’ The way Dan asks me make me feel like he trusts my opinion – there is a respect in his voice I don’t hear often enough in my job back in New York.
‘Hypothetically, absolutely!’ I tell him with glee.
‘This is what you do, of course. No wonder you’re writing an article for a big New York publication, you’ve an amazing eye.’
‘It’s a gold mine, Dan.’ I glance up. Though we are underground, the roof is high. ‘It’s your gold mine!’ I shake my head still trying to register His Lordship’s news.
‘Hmmm.’ Then he looks away, begins to close his shirt, fastening one slow button at a time. ‘Food for thought alright. Uh-huh. Speaking of food, hungry?’ he asks suddenly, changing the subject very abruptly and moving across the cellar with purpose.
‘Em, um, am I – eh, a lot actually, I came down for dinner,’ I remember, more than surprised at the hastily shut down conversation.
‘I’ve some fruit? Yogurt?’ He offers me.
‘Eh, lovely.’ I wince as I take a step towards him on my ankle.
‘Sit down. Let me look at that?’ Dan folds over.
‘No, please, don’t fuss. It’s fine,’ I protest.
Dan ignores me and turns a barrel on its side for me to sit on. I’m still staring at him, he’s hard to read right now.
‘It’s empty, I’m not that strong. Will ya just sit down, please?’ he says, mistaking my curious stare.
I oblige as he moves behind a partition and returns with two bowls.
‘My parents always believed in snacking on fruit during the day. Like a lot of their traditions, I’ve adopted this one. Terry thinks it’s a bit girly.’ Dan laughs and hands me a bowl with a spoon in it as he dips his own spoon and takes a bite. I decide to give him some space and go with the change of subject.
‘They really are wonderful, inspiring people,’ I tell him and my heart aches that his mother is ill.
‘They are.’ He looks thoughtful as that sadness creeps over him again. Now I know why – he really has the weight of the world on his shoulders. I wish I could rescue him.
‘Thank you.’ I need something to distract him, I think as I chew a creamy mouthful. ‘Unfortunately, I got zero parental traditions apart from the run-a-mile-from-marriage one. I didn’t have an easy childhood.’ Unintentionally I open up to him and immediately he looks at me sympathetically.
‘Tough going?’ His lip curls.
‘Ahh, nothing like millions of other kids didn’t experience but it was hard. Both good people but the wrong partnership, disastrous marriage,’ I tell him. To my utter horror, a knot tightens in my stomach. There’s a lump in my throat and I’m finding it hard to swallow the fruit. It’s as if Dan hears the slight shake in my voice.
‘And that’s it, isn’t it?’ He pulls out a small crate and sits on it, nearer to me. ‘It’s what I’ve always said, it’s why I believe there are two people made for each other. It’s what I believe in.’ He raises his spoon as his voice is tinged with support. ‘Love needsto be a partnership. I was lucky enough to witness that with my parents, but also unlucky enough, if you know what I mean?’
‘No, what do you mean?’ I ask in confusion, composing myself, swallowing that emotion as I scoop another spoonful up and taste the sweetest blueberries.
‘Well, I think Esther and Michael are the reason I haven’t gotten married yet. I put their marriage on a pedestal. They had the perfect marriage, Maggie, they gave us the most wonderful childhood and it’s scary to me to settle for anything less. It was true love.’ Dan holds his spoon aloft. ‘That got way deeper than I intended.’
‘Me too, don’t worry, I totally get it. Like I said, my parents’ marriage was so bad, I’m terrified of it.’
‘We’re a right pair.’ Dan gives a small laugh. ‘You don’t want to get married because you’re afraid it will be a disaster, I don’t want to get married because I’m afraid it won’t live up to my great expectations.’
We let that fester as we eat our fruit together. I’ve never enjoyed a comfortable silence the way I do with him. Being with Dan Delaney feels effortless.
‘You were born here, in Heartwell?’ I ask, before finishing my yogurt and clutching my bowl.
‘Yes, and you? New York?’ His soft lilting voice remains music to my ears.
