Every cell in her body longed to reach for him, to throw herself into his arms. But how could she after he said goodbye?
She opened her mouth to beg him to stay, to tell him how she wantedhimto be her groom, but the servants surrounding her had pushed her into the house, already pulling at her hair and clothing, eager to divest her of anything she’d shared with him. The last she saw of Will before the door of the castle shut was his hand, waving a slow farewell.
“… and be faithful to him, as long as you both shall live?”
Adelaide’s tongue was too large for her mouth, so dry and heavy she wondered if she’d ever be able to speak again. Her ears had taken in the vicar’s words, and she recognized the murmurs of the parishioners gathered in the ancient chapel in the center of Barrington, but made no move to speak.
The hours since Will left had been a blur of activity, so fervent she hadn’t realized how her ears buzzed with static, her mind replaying Will’s departure in a ceaseless litany of torment. A week ago, she’d been so excited about the wedding she’d been unable to sleep, but now she had to dig her fingers into the silk ribbon holding together her posy of roses to keep from tugging her veil from her hair and screaming in protest.
But could she throw away her dreams when Will had given no sign he wanted her in return?
“Adelaide,” Lord Clements—John, her fiancé,whispered under his breath, and she jerked, blinking at his befuddled expression. Light streaming in through the stained-glass windows caught on his silver hair, the glint of his blue-gray eyes. He would be a kind husband, support her writing and allow her to find her voice. That alone was far more than most women enjoyed in their marriages. She should be grateful, and yet she found herself desperate to flee from his presence.
After a minute of her gawking, her fiancé sighed and turned to the vicar. “Might I have a private word with my betrothed?”
The vicar gaped, and, as John had not bothered to keep his voice down, the congregation burst into scandalized whispers. Without waiting for the clergyman’s approval, John took her hand and led her into the sacristy, closing the door behind them.
“What are you doing?” Adelaide managed, still unsure what had just happened.
“I could ask you the same thing.” He leaned against the vicar’s desk and crossed his arms, and when he spoke, his words were gentle. “Have you changed your mind about our marriage?”
Yes!“No!” If only her voice hadn’t cracked. She cleared her throat and tried again. “No. I—I haven’t.”
John’s lips flattened. “When you wrote to me last month, you were still keen on this.”
“And I still am.” There, that sounded more confident. “I want to write for you, and together we can get this act passed.” She attempted to smile, but its fractured edges cut into her cheeks. “I—this is what I want. I’m certain.” Tears burned and her voice gave a dangerous bobble.
“Are you trying to convince me or yourself?”
A tear broke free, streaked down her cheek, followed by several more. Those traitors. “I p-promised you,” shestammered, swiping furiously at her eyes. “I promised we’d marry, that I’d help you honor your late wife’s wishes.”
He pushed off the desk and caught her hands. The tears fell unencumbered now, the ache in her chest so ragged each inhalation scraped and tore at her insides.
“Forgive me if I’m reluctant to take a crying woman to wife. Please tell me what’s changed.”
Everything. She gave him a wobbly smile. “I met someone, someone who…”
For the first time in as long as she could remember, she had no words. Nothing captured what Will meant to her, what he might mean to her in the future if they were given the chance. The few tears she’d managed to push back returned with a vengeance.
John passed over his handkerchief and waited until she regained enough control to meet his gaze. “Someone special,” he finished for her, and she nodded her gratitude. He gave a knowing hum. “Do you love this someone special?”
She sniffed. “I think so. It all happened quickly.”
“How quickly?”
“He’s the blacksmith who drove me here.”
John’s brows shot up. “That is rather quickly. Impressive.”
Adelaide laughed and found the fist around her throat had loosened a bit. “Yes, I do love him.”
“Did he treat you well? Perhaps love you in return?”
An image of Will’s face the night before as she climaxed on top of him flooded her mind, the pride and desire and love in his expression palpable, even in her memory. “Yes.”
A wistful smile pulled at John’s lips. “I was blessed with thirty-two years with my someone, and that wasn’t enough time. Finding another person whom you can love is a tremendous gift, and if fate has handed it to you…”
Her heart clenched at the word fate. Perhaps the universe wasn’t working against them.
