My mouth caresses her ear, my breath at her cheek. We’re both breathing hard with exertion and emotion.
“Kady, listen to me,” I whisper, feeling her body tighten again in my arms. “You are not stupid. And I’ve never once considered you a jersey chaser. This is all on me. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m at the lowest point in my life right now – no home, no career, no prospects, a dying stepfather. But I’ve realized that without you, my life doesn’t make sense. Somehow everything will be better and brighter if you’re with me. I’ll be able to get through it. I can breathe when you’re near me. My life is a disaster without you in it.”
Her flailing dies down and she’s now calm and silent in my arms. I’m not sure a quiet Kady is ever a good thing.
I slowly lower her to the ground and let her go. She stands with her back to me for a second and I’m certain she’s about to walk away. Her feet move.
One step.
Two steps.
I lose my breath. My heart sinks to my stomach and I finally understand what it means to lose everything. All my dreams shattered. And the girl I love walking away from me, even after I’ve bled my heart to her.
But then she stops, swings around and comes in punching. Not hard, just small hands and fists beating at me like I’m her personal punching bag.
“Goddamn you, Gavin,” she cries. “Goddamn you for doing this to me. You hurt me so bad. I cried over you like a fool, but I still love you.”
My fingers circle her wrists, halting her tiny punches. My smile feels foreign across my lips. It’s the first one I’ve worn in weeks.
My head is bent as I place my fingers underneath her chin so her eyes can meet mine. The blues of her eyes sparkle with unshed tears.
“Wait, say that again. You love me?”
She grunts loudly. “Yes, I love you, you oversized fuckwad. Even after I vowed never to fall in love – especially not with a basketball player. I can’t even get that right. I’m such a failure!”
We laugh together at her self-deprecating confession.
“Kady, you didn’t fail at this. I think we both won. I’m the clear winner, for sure.”
A silence descends upon us for a moment, as we both contemplate what this means and what comes next. We have a lot to figure out, individually and with respect to us.
Her voice is whisper soft when she speaks. “I’m sorry about the league and your stepdad. That sucks balls.”
I straighten and wrap my arm around her waist, tucking her in under my chin. Our heartbeats are wonky and fast, beating rapidly against each other. Our souls speak to one another in a rhythm only known to us. It feels natural. Like it was meant to be. That there’s a reason we go through all this shit in life.
“Yeah, it sucks sweaty balls. But it’s life, I guess. As my mom says, you just have to ride the wave and see where it takes you.”
“What’s gonna happen now?”
I haven’t told anyone about my decision yet, only Christian. He and I talked a lot about my plans and my options since I’ve been back and I finally solidified my decision. I’d always regret it if I didn’t take the risk and try going pro.
“Well, I’ve put my name in the hat and declared myself eligible for the NBA draft next month. We’ll see where things go from there.”
She bounces on her toes and her voice shrills with excitement.
“Oh my God, that’s awesome, Gavin! I’m so proud of you.”
“Yeah, well…I guess we’ll see. And what about you? Now that you’re home, are you going back to school?”
Kady snorts loudly, taking a step back from my embrace. Her smirk is cute.
“You’re a funny man. No, I told my dad I wasn’t going back. It was a battle of wills for a few days, but he calmed down and finally realized there was no point arguing with me. He did, however, make me get a job. So, I’ve been working and have started to save money so I can move to L.A.”
Wait, what?The bottom drops out of my world. “You’re moving to L.A.? When?”
She nods emphatically. “As soon as I have enough saved for rent and deposit and have a job lined up out there. Maybe you should consider drafting to one of the L.A. teams.”
The funny thing about her comment is that my top three choices were Phoenix, San Antonio and L.A. Maybe with her confidence and faith behind me, it will actually happen.
Maybe with Kady by my side, all my dreams will come true.
