She nodded against his shoulder. “I woke three weeks later in hospital. I’d had metal rods put in my back and legs to fix my broken spine and femurs.”
The words came calmly out of her mouth. She could speak easily about her own injuries but couldn’t bear to contemplate what she’d done to others.
It wasnae something ye did but something ye suffered.
“I dinna know how ye do it,” Oskar said softly.
“Do what?”
“Be the person ye are, after all ye’ve been through. I know that I couldnae. If it were me, I would be twisted with bitterness and anger and yet ye are not. Ye shame me, Lily. Ye are stronger than I could ever hope to be.”
Strong? She wasn’t strong. She was broken.
Lily searched Oskar’s eyes for any sign of deceit or mockery, but all she found was sincerity and a depth of understanding that took her breath away. She had always seen herself as damaged beyond repair by her guilt and grief. But in Oskar’s gaze, she saw something else reflected back at her—resilience and strength.
“I don’t feel strong,” she finally admitted, her voice barely more than a whisper. “I feel like a fraud, living a life that I’m not entitled to.”
Oskar tightened his grip around her shoulders. “We aren’t defined by our pasts, Lily. Surviving doesnae make ye a fraud, lass. It makes ye a fighter. Ye survived because ye are strong. God in Heaven, woman! Why can ye not see the woman I see? Why can ye not see the remarkable woman I’ve fallen in love with?”
Lily froze. Oskar’s words swirled around her like a gust of wind threatening to knock her off balance. Had he really just said what she thought he had?
“I...” Lily struggled to find the words. “I never thought...”
Oskar gave a soft, mocking laugh. “Neither did I. But there we are.”
He cupped her face gently in his hands, his touch feather-light against her skin. He leaned forward and kissed her, their lips meeting in a soft collision of warmth.
Thoughts of the past, of the future, were pushed aside. She slid closer, pressing herself against him, running her fingers across the smooth ridges of his bare back and shoulders. Her eyes closed as they kissed, and now all she could feel and hear and smell was him.
An image suddenly flashed through her mind.Oskar’s face twisted with fury. His fist smashing into Bryn Fletcher’s face. His hands raised, a dagger clasped in his fists...
She broke away, gasping.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I can’t...I don’t...”
He watched her for a moment, his eyes dark. Then a wry smile twisted his lips. “It’s all right, Lily,” he said softly. Sadness and longing shone in his eyes.
“But you don’t understand—” Lily began but he put a finger against her lips to quiet her.
“Ye dinna need to explain. I’ll leave ye to sleep.” He climbed to his feet then walked out the door, pulling it shut behind him..
Lily watched him go, heart pounding with confusion and desire. She should go after him. Shouldn’t she? Wasn’t this what she’d been wanting ever since the night he’d kissed her?
But she didn’t move as Oskar pulled the door shut, leaving her alone with her racing heart and swirling thoughts.
