‘A holiday,’ Monty said.
‘Yep, Radia deserves one.’
‘So… she doesn’t go to school?’ he asked innocently.
‘No,’ Joy told him, her voice pitching a little in warning.
‘Isn’t she five?’ Monty pressed, not sure why the topic was a sore one.
Joy only drank from her glass and kept her eyes fixed on the shore, falling quiet enough to make Monty panic.
‘Ah! Was I being nosy? Sorry. I’ve spent too much time with Mrs Crocombe. It’s obviously none of my business. I didn’t mean anything—’
‘It’s fine,’ interrupted Joy. ‘Honestly.’
Again, she fell silent, drawing in a deep breath as she turned her eyes to the skies above Clove Lore. There were stars visible and a planet, Jupiter, in the east. She thought about mentioning it, but as a fisherman he’d know all about the night skies, so she just looked on in quiet wonder.
Monty tracked her eyes’ progress across the heavens, lighting himself upon the North Star.
‘Polaris,’ he said. ‘He’s seriously showing off tonight, right? The sailors’ star. I’m guessing you’re a seasoned sailor? Radia too.Shecouldn’t be more relaxed.’ This was said with kind laughter and a glance over at the spot where she slumbered. ‘When I’ve had guests on the boat before there’s always one throwing up.’
Joy wondered why she wanted to ask him if he’d brought other women out here for a twilight picnic like this. She mentally batted the thought away.
Monty must have seen the change in her because he immediately got up and made his way to the cabin, fetching a blanket.
When he got back, he motioned to Joy to lift her glass and he draped the blanket over her legs.
‘She’s still asleep?’ Joy asked.
‘Sound.’
She tried to carry on the conversation, pulling the blanket closer as Monty took his spot by her side once more.
‘You’re right, we have sailed a lot. Although I’ve spent a lot of time in dock too.’
‘Having your barnacles sanded?’ Monty’s eyes flitted to Joy’s, alarmed. ‘Sorry, that was weird.’
She smiled again, feeling the need to nudge his arm with her elbow to reassure him. She really did have a knack for making people feel ill at ease.
‘There was this one time I fitted out a cruise ship with MacBooks and custom charging stations, off the coast of Croatia. It was a tech lending-library sort of thing. That was one of my first jobs when I decided to go freelance and get out of London. Radia came along with me as part of the deal and since it was a family firm and I had insurance for her being with me, they didn’t mind her tagging along.’
‘How old was she then?’
‘We had her first birthday on board,’ she said, before falling silent, thinking of the trainee chef bringing a cheesecake with one candle and the way the service staff had sung. No wonder Radia thought of the bookshop gathering the other night as a ‘party’, poor kid. She hadn’t been to many proper parties in her life. The thought dragged her inside herself again.
‘You’re seriously getting the sea chills,’ Monty observed, already on the move, covering the food and packing it away. ‘Let’s get you home.’
Joy wanted to protest but it was his boat and he’d have an early start in the morning, no doubt, so she’d have to let him take her back to the harbour.
As he started the engine, she joined him in the cabin, the blanket now pulled around her shoulders like a shawl. Radia was still curled up and dreaming by her side.
‘Thank you,’ she whispered to Monty. ‘For tonight.’
‘Even though we didn’t catch a thing? Well, maybe a cold,’ he said, keeping one hand on the wheel, the other reaching out and adjusting her blanket, pulling closed the little gap at her throat.
For the first time in a long time, Joy found herself feeling helpless, but she noted, unafraid. All she could do was look at Monty’s earnest face and that soft smile.
Her entire body was telling her he’d be warm and solid to lean against if only he’d wrap his arms around her, but the cautious instinct that had ruled her life for so long now forbade her. She’d need him to do it, to pull her close.
