She spared me a glance, then sighed. “I just…can’t help but wonder. Who did I actually fall in love with? Levi? Or Lucifer? The thought that I might have lovedhim—that I could be capable of loving someone like him—terrifies me. He was pure evil, and yet…” Her voice broke. “I miss him.”
I didn’t say anything. Words couldn’t fix that kind of wound. Instead, I wrapped my arm around her and rested my forehead gently against hers.
“A part of me wishes he was still here,” she whispered. “But do I want him here because I loved Levi, or because I want to stab Lucifer a few dozen times for doing this to me?”
“Can’t it be both?” I asked.
“Maybe. But does that make me terrible?”
I opened my eyes and leaned back, holding her gaze. “It just makes you aperson. Emotions are complex, and sometimes we don’t need to understand them. We just need to feel them. One day, it won’t hurt as much. It won’t happen quickly, but I truly believe one morning you’ll wake up, and you won’t even think about him.”
“I wouldn’t mind that happening now,” she said, sighing.
I laid my head on her shoulder and together, we just sat there.
After a few moments, she said, “Thank you.”
I straightened. “What for?”
“For being here. For sitting with me,” she said. “For not treating me like I’m broken.”
A small smile touched my lips. “Nah. No one here is broken. We’re just a little…bruised. But bruises fade.”
Her breath shook again, but this time it wasn’t a sob—more like a release. “I hope so.”
“They will,” I promised.
After a few silent moments, I lifted my head and stared down the corridor. I’d grown up in this palace. I knew every nook and cranny. But beyond that, I’d once memorized every patrol, every hellspawn, that walked these hallways. Now, there was no one and nothing but the sound of silence. I’d first noticed it when leaving my bedroom, and I’d intended to ask Rathiel about it, but then I’d spotted Eliza and decided her pain took precedence over my curiosity.
“Where is everyone?” I asked. “Where are my soldiers?”
Eliza heaved another sigh and looped her arm around mine. “They’re gone.”
I didn’t need to ask what she meant or where they’d gone. I could hear it in her voice—the finality of it. I’d known this was coming, prepared myself for it even. But knowing something in theory and seeing the hollow reality of it were two very different things.
“Ah,” I whispered. I truly hadn’t thought it would happen that fast.
I blew out a breath, my chest suddenly too tight to breathe. We’d known from the start that when I took my place as Hell’s rightful ruler, the hellspawn would revert back to their proper soul state. They were never meant to exist like this in the first place. My father had created them, trapped them here, condemned them to a mindless existence on his whim.
Their disappearance was a good thing. It meant we’d won their freedom and found the balance we’d been fighting for. Now they had a chance to move on.
But damn, it hurt.
I would miss them. So much.
We’d come so far together. They’d stood at my side for so long, I wasn’t ready to do this without them.
I swallowed and stared at the stretch of hallway ahead. The heat radiating off the stones felt different now, less like perpetual hellfire and more like the warmth left in a hearth after the flames died.
I had so many questions and no one left to answer them. My mind immediately flashed to Levi. He’d been the one guiding me through all this. Helping me in any way he could. But thanks to my father, Levi was dead, and for a single breath, I felt truly alone.
No, that wasn’t true. I still had Rathiel and Eliza. Calyx. And?—
“Where’s Mephisar?” I suddenly asked. “And Dragon?”
Eliza was quick to reassure me, squeezing my hand. “Mephisar is still here. He’s outside, slithering around, doing hell beasty stuff.” She paused. “Unfortunately, Dragon disappeared alongside the rest of the hellspawn.”
Oh…
