“Yeah, well, no harm done, so we’re good.” He looks over at the bus, then back at me. “You know, if there’s anything you need to talk about, I’m all ears.”
It’s funny he would say that when he’s the one who ran off with Bianca, only to leave her halfway across the country. Maybe he’s the one that needs an outlet.
But I know not to push it.
“Same.”
He nods and heads over to the weights set out in the parking lot.
Every moment of the day is plagued with uncertainty. It’s not the first time in my life I’ve run into money problems, but before, it was always manageable. My momma would be a couple hundred short on rent, and I’d hit the neighborhood looking for work. It was a month-to-month problem that reset every thirty days, whereas what I’m facing now is an ever-looming shadow.
Thankfully, Maria is now working. Not that I can withdraw the support I now give her and my nieces, but there’s hope that in time, she’ll be able to stand on her own again.
Slay storms toward the bus, glaring pure fury at me as he boards.
Fuck it. What do I care if he hates me when I’ve done nothing wrong? He can act like a child all he wants. Let the others see his dumb mantrums for what they are.
Determined to get my mind off my worries, I stretch my biceps and go over my workout plan.
“Hey, droid daddy,” Samantha purrs as she comes up beside me. Her green eyes sparkle in the late morning sun, and she’s wearing a smile I haven’t seen before. It’s unguarded. Girlish, even.
“I saw you working upstairs and didn’t want to bother you,” I tell her, which is a half-truth, because the real reason I left her is because I’m too damn stressed and I didn’t want to get short with her.
“You, my good sir, are never a bother.” She bites her lower lip and waggles her eyebrows, making her intentions clear.
“Woman, what do you think you’re doing?”
“You’re the one who said pregnant women have insatiable appetites.”
“And where do you suppose I should take care of that? I know you’re fond of bathrooms.” I nod to the gas station across the street. “What do you say?”
She punches my arm. “Gross!”
Feeling like shit for neglecting her, I say, “I’m sorry we haven’t had much alone time.”
“You know, as crazy as this sounds, I think the chaos helps with getting to know you better.”
“How so?”
“Everyone puts on a false face when they’re alone and trying to impress someone. With you being surrounded by people you know, you can’t do that. I get to see the real Toxic, and I kind of like what I see.”
My world all but stops, because it almost sounds like she’s saying we might have a future together.
But admittedly, I could just be reaching.
Cupping her cheeks in my hands, I bring my eyes to hers. “I know I’ve put a lot of pressure on you lately, but we have time to get to know each other. I’m not trying to own you or back you into a corner…mostly because I know you’d fight me like a rabid raccoon.”
She giggles and brushes a stray lock of hair away from her face. “I know I was super pessimistic about us in the beginning, but it’s almost like I’ve been injected with a potent dose of toxic positivity.”
What I wouldn’t give to inject her with something else…
Morning, noon, and night, there isn’t a moment that goes by that Samantha doesn’t look absolutely perfect, and seeing her so playful suddenly makes me feel hope that’s best not kindled. Not when my life has suddenly turned into such a mess.
She pulls out her phone and toggles through the screen. “So, this might come as a surprise, but I was looking at RVs. I’m not saying I’d live in one, but I could spend a week with you here and there. I’m sure little droid would love it.”
A potent mixture of dread and excitement floods my veins. What did I do to warrant such unimaginable cruelty? To have my dream so close, yet just out of my reach.
Tears threaten to spill down my cheeks. I pull her close and wrap her in my arms so she can’t see them. “God, you have no idea what you do to me.”
