Page 141 of Hunk Off!


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“I don’t think that’s necessary?—”

Wayne leans forward and says, “Even if you don’t plan on accepting the deal, it’s good to know what they have.” He winks.

Carl gets up so fast, his seat tips over. “No-fucking-thank-you!”

A strange, surreal calmness washes over me, like somehow things were meant to happen this way. Not that I have any intention of betraying Carl. He was a lifeline to me when I most needed one, and some debts you simply can’t repay. But something, a little voice inside of me, tells me that maybe I shouldn’t be so worried.

I grab Carl’s wrist and tell him, “Sit the hell down.”

Seething with anger, Carl yanks his arm away, but instead of leaving, he barks, “Fine. Show me what’s so damn important.”

Samantha walks over to the screen, which has a laptop off to the side, and taps a few buttons. The room fills with the sound of Samantha and Priest greeting each other.

Samantha:We don’t have long, so let’s cut to the chase. I need to know everything you have on the Hunks. Every-little-thing.

Priest:Trust me, I have enough.

Samantha:Saying you have enough isn’t enough.

Priest:I have stories, women that will come forward and say whatever I need them to, I know a few venue owners that are pissed at Carl and can be convinced to take my side, and that fucking video I gave you.

Samantha:About that video. I noticed it began with you getting thrown out of a closet by Carl. Where is the part before that?

Priest:It’s deleted.

Samantha:Why? That’s going to raise questions.

Priest:Never mind why. No one needs to see it.

“What the fuck is this?” Priest snaps, rising to his feet. I’m suddenly relieved Samantha moved across the room.

Frank takes a step towards him, waiting to pounce if needed, and I stay alert, ready for action.

Samantha:If this goes to court, they’re going to want to know why you deleted it.

Priest:You said you didn’t want it to go to court.

Samantha:I don’t, but there’s always the chance. Carl could sue you for slander and libel.

Priest:Look, all I care about is ruining that fucker’s life. So just show him everything we have, threaten him with more, and make sure I own the fucking Hunks when we’re done.

Samantha:I understand your eagerness, but it’s good to be careful. Now, I’m going to ask you something, and you can’t lie. Remember, we’re on the same side. There’s a rumor you did something to deserve the beating Carl gave you. I need to know what that is so I can get our ducks in a row, pay off the right people, and make the opposition…change their tune.

Priest is visibly seething, and I prepare to launch across the table if he makes one fucking move, which at this point seems inevitable.

Priest:That fucking bitch Vanessa ran her whore mouth, so I decided to show her what a real fucking man?—

Without warning, Carl leaps over the table, but Frank is quick, and pulls Priest to safety. Carl doesn’t relent and lunges toward the two, arms outstretched.

The whole fucking room is chaos, and I scramble to pull Carl away and position myself between Samantha and the brawl, but the crashing open of doors draws everyone’s attention to the back of the room.

Three burly men enter, shouting at us to break it up. Thankfully, it’s enough to make Carl rethink his murderous intention.

Once we’re settled, it’s Samantha who speaks, looking directly at Priest as she does. “Now that you know a fraction of what I have on you, you will immediately retract the statements you’ve made online against the Hunks and say you’re checking yourself into rehab. I don’t care if you go or not, but you will say that you are.”

“Fuck that!” Priest snarls.

“Mr. Fischer, as a lawyer who is not representing you, I highly suggest you take the offer that was just made. Every accusation you’ve made, Samantha has gone out of her way to dismantle.”