I noticed too much these days. A body I shouldn’t be looking at when I suddenly couldn’t look away, as if a switch had been flicked.
I grabbed a heap of snacks to take outside, before confirming with Tammy that her and her friend were coming. She’d almost cancelled, and I knew Seb wanted her here, so I spewed whatever I could and was relieved when she agreed.
The soft click of a door closing caught my attention, followed by a choked sound.
What was that?
Stepping into the hallway, someone barrelled right into me and I caught them just in time.
I inhaled at the sight of her red eyes, arms wrapped tight around herself, as she stumbled backwards.
“Evy, what are - are you okay?”
I shouldn’t have used the name. Her name. The one I only ever said when it was just us, when things felt different.
“I’m not feeling well,” she said, voice brittle and my chestinstantly burned with worry. “Tell my brother to call me when he wants me to come get him.”
She walked around me, head down, hiding like she would with everyone else. Everyone who wasn’t me.
“Evangeline, wait!” I called, panic flaring at what could possibly be wrong. What or who caused her to be so upset.
But she didn’t stop. She didn’t look back. And I was left standing there, heavy with fear, as she walked out the front door wearing nothing but a damn bikini and the look of someone broken.
“Where is she?” I asked Seb, already scanning the clusters of people drifting through the backyard. Time felt slippery, my senses blurring around the edges as I fought to keep my emotions in check. Emotions which were connected to confusion and now fear. Did she leave? Did my father upset her beyond repair? Was it all too much?
“Eva?” he clarified, frowning. “I thought she was with you?” His gaze dropped to my hand, lingering on the mess of blood I’d barely managed to wipe away.
“She was,” my voice was hurried, heartbeat ticking louder. “And now she’s not. I need to find her.”
God, I needed to find her. Because the alternative was, she fled after a conversation I didn’t hear enough of to know what was actually happening. My hand itched to go back inside and make him tell me everything. Itched to do more damage than I already had. Years of anger exploding in the worst way.
“Look,” he said, resting a hand on my shoulder. A gesture meant to soothe, though his face was far from calm. “Maybe she went home. Let me call her.”
“I’ve tried like five times,” I snapped. “I’ll let you know though,” I added, already turning away before he could protest.
I’d heard her in my father’s office, her voice sharp with bitterness. Then I heard him, and those words he fucking dared to call her. A vicious, looping soundtrack that only stopped when I reminded him exactly how I felt about her.
The flicker of fear behind his haughty scoff only fuelled me. And then came the final threat - choose us or her. As if it had ever been a fucking choice. She was family. And unlike them, she had chosen me more times and in more ways than they ever would. Even now, I felt no guilt over the mess I left him in. Truthfully, it was only my mother’s screams that pulled me away - made me retreat, made me finally see I’d done enough.
He was a pathetic, miserable man whom I owed nothing. Not my loyalty or my anger.
A nobody.
She, however, was different. She was what I wanted. What I needed. And now I couldn’t fucking find her.
“We’re coming with you!”
I heard the thud of multiple footfalls behind me, knowing without turning that it was the whole gang. I appreciated their willingness to help because I didn’t even know where to start, but they weren’t my concern.
She was. Only her. Always her.
Andy yanked me towards his car, and I followed without protest, knowing it would be quicker than locating the driver I’d hired for tonight. The car ride was short, but it stretched painfully long inside my head. I couldn’t sit still - leg bouncing, heart pounding.
Had I lost her? What the hell were she and my father arguing about before I got there?
Why did she leave? Was it too much?
God, I had more questions than she did and no one to answer any of them.
