And then scream at him some more for staying away for so long after because even though he’s an Essentari, even though the wounds healed quicker than they would have on the average man, he still had to have been in so much pain. And he went through it all…alone.
He looks at me, as if daring me to do exactly that. Daring me to tell him how insufferable he is, how reckless he is, but I don’t. I don’t because I would have done the same if roles were reversed.
“He said you wanted to end the trials,” I say instead. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
“Because I haven’t actually accomplished anything.” His voice is angry, so angry, but also full of so much sorrow. He doesn’t understand that what truly matters is the fact that he’strying.
At least, he was before I messed everything up.
“Without the trials,” I say, loathing the words I’m thinking because I hate the trials. I always have, but part of me understands why they exist. Why theyneedto exist. “How will the planet survive?”
His teeth clench, his jaw feathers, and he opens his mouth to speak, but then he closes it.
He sits on the bed next to me.
“Jax?” I slide my hand over his thigh.
“There’s more than one way to control the population,” he says pointedly, and I angle my head because I can’t possibly think of another way. But the way he said it…it’s almost as if his words have another meaning…one I don’t understand. “Come on, it’s time for you to get ready. Ajja’s waiting.”
“Ajja?” I stand.
“You said you wanted to meet him.”
“I do.” My eyes widen.
“Then you better get dressed. I’ll wait for you in the hall.” He closes the door behind him, and I force a few slow breaths before walking to the bathroom where my trial clothes hang on a hook.
Ishla brought them to my room over a week ago.
I slip into the tight leather pants, the material molding to my legs like a second skin. The matching black vest buttons up the front,cinching at my waist, structured enough to offer protection but flexible enough to move in.
Finally, I tug on the knee-high boots before twisting my long hair into a braid.
“You look ready for battle,”Nyxa says, and I nod at my reflection, knowing she can see the movement.“Just make sure your mind is ready, too.”
Closing my eyes, I make quick work of reinforcing the brick wall I’ve been neglecting for weeks, ensuring every hole is filled. Stone by stone, I secure it in place. Only when every crack is sealed do I open my eyes.
“I’m ready,” I tell her, flexing my fingers, feeling the weight of my words—words that, two months ago, I never would have imagined myself saying.
Nyxa chuckles.“I know you are.”
Chapter 34
Serafina
“Ajja!” I exclaim, moving far faster toward the beast than I probably should. But there’s something about his golden eyes that are far too similar to Jax’s, and it makes me think I can trust him, and I know he won’t hurt me.
I’m at the wolf’s side in seconds, and he’s much bigger than I thought he’d be. When Jax told me we’d be riding on his back the entire way to Village 28, I was a bit skeptical. But now…now I understand.
My hand dives into his thick gray coat, and his black nose brushes against my neck, the wetness sending a shiverdown my spine.
“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” I say, rubbing the spot just beneath his ears, an area I need to stand on my tiptoes to reach.
He nods, releasing a noise between a growl and a bark, as if saying the same, as if he can understand me. But then he sniffs me, and his eyes snap to Jax.
The beast freezes.
“Jax…what just happened?” I ask, my gaze still on Ajja, but Jax doesn’t respond, either because he doesn’t want to, or because Ajja’s speaking to him. “Is Ajja all right?”
