“Gavin tell yuh mi pregnant wid twins?” I laugh, then she says he didn’t tell her the gender.
“Mixed gender,” I tell her.
She SCREAMS.
All now she nuh care who outside or how she look. Her joy is loud, unfiltered. I beam. “Hope yuh know seh dat boy a mi husband,” she grins.
“A yuh cousin!” I laugh.
“Tell har again, cuz gyal,” Gavin laughs. Gutta glances at him.Lawd Jesus.
Nickoi chuckles. “Mi nuh know if the baby shower tomorrow too sudden fi unuh?”
My eyes light up. He’s inviting them. Awww… he wants my family around. “How mi fi miss it? Zara and Prezi baby shower? Please!” Sash says, hands on her hips like a drama queen.
“Thanks fi invite me,” my father says quietly, and Nickoi nods. I can’t stop smiling.
Peace.
Sweet.
Solid… overdue peace.
31
Perfect
Nickoi pauses the game. The screen freezes. “Zara… come yer,” he says, voice low. I turn from the mirror, the pen still in my hand. I was writing the last bit of our reunion yesterday in my journal. I close the book and walk over to him. I sit next to him, eyes flicking to the paused Need for Speed game, then back at him. He looks serious. His hand rubs the edge of his shorts. “I’m sorry ‘bout yesterday,” he says. I watch him for a second.
“What exactly you sorry for?”
He hesitates. “The way mi talk to yuh. The way mi act… mi did… outta line yuh know?” I nod slowly, the weight of his words settling in the space between us.
“So…” I start, biting the inside of my cheek. “When yuh seh yuh woulda lick mi inna mi mouth, did yuh mean it?” His eyes meet mine.
“No,” he says, no hesitation. “Mi never mean it. I was just…Jah know.” I tilt my head slightly, watching his face, trying to read him deeper.
“Be honest, Nickoi. Would you ever hit mi?” He exhales hard through his nose, then speaks softer.
“You notice mi never dweet? Mi vex, yeah. But mi coulda never bring miself fi hurt yuh. Not in that way.” He pauses. “Mi nah cross certain line. Mi never grow up fi be that kinda man, mi a try everyday to not be my father, at least not in that way.” I nod, feeling something in my chest loosen. He continues, “It nuh mean mi right still… but mi sorry, and mi a go do better. Compose miself more. Not just fi me, but fi you… and wi youth dem.” I glance down at my nude nails, the ones Wendy did yesterday. I smile a little.
.
“Mi love these,” I say randomly. “Longest I’ve gone in my short nails journey.”
He finally smirks. “Dem look good.” I smile back, just a little.
“Mi accept yuh apology,” I tell him. “I just… I just needed to ask.”
“Mi understand,” he says. “Yuh have every right.”
I lie back on the bed and Nickoi shifts next to me, resting his head gently on my belly. I run my fingers through his hair as he rubs my bump. “Which one you think a go prefer me?” he asks, voice soft.
“Obviously the boy,” I say with a small smile.
He laughs. “Let’s see,” he says, rubbing again and the baby moves under his hand. He grins. “Why mi feel like a mi mini-me a gwan so?” Mi feel a him yes.
“Mi think so too,” I laugh, and he lets his hand drift down to my thighs. I ignore it, staying focused. “Mi nuh know why, but mi feel like him a go be really rude.”
