“If he put in any effort,” she said.
“Again, harsh.” He shot her a glare which quickly dissolved when she kissed his cheek. Were they all so close as to touch each other?
“We’re just looking out for you Stoney,” Birdie chimed in. “Not natural for someone to go that long without–”
“And with that, I say it’s time for bed.” Stone shoved his glasses to the top of his head and pressed his palms into his eyes and she couldn’t help it, Aesira smiled. Each time she’d run into thesmuggler it was nothing but sarcastic quips. It was nice to see him on the receiving end for once.
“Boo,” Bee and Birdie said in unison.
“Log a few hours before we dock, you deviants,” Stone said. The crew filed out, Aesira following behind Patch when Stone tapped her shoulder.
“Commander, a word?”
His blush hadn’t faded but he didn’t shy away when she met his gaze. “Yes?” she asked, retaking her seat.
“I figured it would be good if we discussed…” He gestured between them. “Before we get to the Outpost.”
“Discuss what exactly?” Sleep was beginning to weigh on her, her eyes scratchy and limbs heavy. If they were to dock at the Outpost within the next few hours, she’d need some semblance of rest.
“You know,” Stone said. “Discuss what happened between us.”
Aesira’s laugh was so jarring it made Stone jump from across the table. “Us? There is no us, Odega.”
He watched her, his eyes tracing her face from her brows to her lips. “I know that,” he said. “I just meant maybe we should clear the air. Lessen the awkwardness a bit.”
Now it was Aesira’s turn to blush. Heat scorched the tips of her ears down to her chest. “There’s nothing to talk about.” All humor was drained from her tone. She stood from the bench, a new determination to get as far away from Stone as possible fueling her steps.
“Right,” Stone said. “I guess it’s easier to ignore the fact that you kissed an Odega than accept it.”
She crossed her arms over her chest, wishing she couldn’t feel the hammering of her heart. “You’re right, I’d rather ignore the fact that it happened altogether.”
He took a ragged breath and downed what was left in the bottle. “You want to know what I think?”
“No. You’re reading too far into it.” She stood and turned for the door, ready to leave Stone and the memory of them in the Phoenix together behind her.
“I think you’re ashamed of what happened.”
Aesira spun around, mouth popped open but when Stone held up a hand, she closed it. “I think you’re angry, too,” he said. “And not at me.” He took a step closer and she wanted to move back, but didn’t. She stayed rooted in place, seeing what he would do. “I think you’re angry at yourself for letting it go as far as it did.” He brushed a piece of hair from her shoulder. “And ashamed of how badly you liked it. Kissing someone like me.Wantingsomeone like me.”
Her teeth ground together, flames licking the tips of her ears and cheeks. “Like I said, you’re reading too far into what happened.” She took a step backward, letting a cool draft pool between them. “Don’t give it a second thought, I sure haven’t.”
“Fair enough. We agree then, it was nothing. Wouldn’t want to tarnish that Zeliath reputation.” Stone dusted her shoulder and smiled but something sharp pierced her chest again.
Herreputation.
How could he know it was her very reputation that she loathed? It made people see her differently. Treat her like she was on a pedestal or fear her when they had no reason to. It made it difficult to make genuine friends and absolutely impossible to find a partnerwhich is exactly what the Order wanted. To keep their knights loyal only to them, with no room for any outside distractions, but shewasdistracted and had been for some time now.
“Anyway,” Stone said, drawing out the word, “Let’s forget it ever happened. Agreed?” He stuck out his hand but she kept her arms crossed.
The night could have easily been with anyone else, but when she walked into the Phoenix, it was only him that she saw. He was the only one in the tavern who didn’t look her way. He didn’t offer to buy her a drink or sweet talk her ear because of her stature. And so she made her move and then he ended up rejecting her.
She had no real reason to be angry. She’d done to others the same thing he’d done to her countless times, but being on the other side of his dismissal stung more than she cared to admit.
Normally, there wasn’t a grudge in the world that Aesira couldn’t hold onto for as long as possible. She’d let it fester out of control until her mind warped what actually happened, making it seem that much worse. But this time, she thought of Kamari. What she might do. Rightfully born first, her sister was full of grace and patience. Two things Aesira could use a dose of.
“Commander?” Stone still had his hand suspended in the air. “Are you okay?”
“Agreed.” She gripped his hand in hers giving it a firm shake. “Let’s move on.”
