Leave nothing behind. Ruse dips her head and bares her teeth as I walk by. Then Rook, then Grey and Skoll. All of their attention now focused on Cade and only Cade.
“Elora!” Cade shouts but I grab Sorin’s hand and pull him into the hallway. “Elora!” My name is the last plea on his lips before the wolves rip into him. I don’t look.
I don’t need to.
Because as Sorin and I continue down the hallway, each and every shadowed corner is filled to the brim with Cade’s screams. I focus on the warmth of Sorin’s fingers laced around mine as the tear of flesh and crack of bone sounds behind us.
Alaric and Rusesettle at my sides as Sam, Tallulah, and I recline in the chairs near the hearth in the kitchen. I wasn’t sure how long it would take them to end Cade’s life, and it turns out, they didn’t need much time at all. The pups have put themselves to bed, leaving the main room much too quiet.
Cade’s screams pulse in my ears, but I focus on the warmth of the fire. Hati and Alaric found no other guards lingering around the Jade Guild, and despite the gnawing feeling in my gut, I have to trust that we’re safe at least for tonight.
“You sure I can’t get you something for those?” Tallulah asks for a second time. I shake my head, glancing at the red and purple bruises skirting along my hands.
“No,” I say. “I want them as a reminder.” She smiles, her face softening as if she understands why I might want that. I run my finger over the knuckles of my right hand. They sting and ache but it brings a smile to my face anyway.
“You know I killed a man once.” Tallulah meets my gaze, her tawny skin dusted with pink. “Two, actually.” She sighs, refocusing her gaze on the fire. “For so long after, their faces visited me every night. A reminder of the terrible thing I did, but it’s that moment, I think, that haunts my husband the most.”
The fire crackles, small embers shooting onto the tile floor.
“How do you mean?” I ask, tracing the edge of my cup with my finger.
“I don’t think it was the act of me killing them that haunts him,” she continues. “But that he wasn’t able to take that burden from me. Wasn’t able to protect me in the ways he thought best.” She sighs, delicately running a finger over the lace of her gown. “We all do terrible things, but it doesn’t mean they’re undeserved.”
“I’m not sorry for Cade.” I take a small sip of my wine, though my stomach sloshes when I do. “If isolation came with a lesson, it would be that we’re all monsters in the dark. And I think I’m okay being one in the light too.”
“Here, here.” Sam raises her glass, casting me a wink.
“Are we monsters?” Tallulah asks. Her brows worry together. “Or are we just women fighting back against a world that’s been taught to hate us. Or maybe it’s easier to label ourselves as something frightening rather than sit in our contentment with blood on our hands.”
I take a sip of my wine, mulling over her words.
“Elora isdefinitelya monster.” Sam tosses a grape at me, her voice laced in humor.
“Well she’s certainly braver than me,” Tallulah says before downing the rest of her tea.
“Monster I can accept.” I cup my wine glass tighter. “But brave…” I shake my head. “I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Ran away one too many times to be considered brave.” My eyes fixate on a single log in the fire. Burning brighter than the others. Orangeand red and a deep set blue. “It wasn’t bravery that got me out of Valebridge. It was the realization that I have more to run to than from these days.” I nudge Sam’s elbow, making her smile before taking a long sip of the huckleberry wine.
“Well said, little wolf.” Sam smiles at me over her cup.
Tallulah sighs. “Today’s been trying,” she says. “I think I’m off to bed. Sleep well, you two.” She brushes a gentle hand across my shoulder as she leaves the kitchen. “And for the record, I still think you’re brave.”
I tip my wine glass close to my lips before I smile into it.
“I’m calling it a night as well.” Sam stretches her arms dramatically overhead. “I just came to see if you’re all right.”
“Perfectly fine.” And the sickening truth of it is Iamfine. Maybe that’s the problem. Where there should be sorrow or guilt for what I did to Cade, I only feel relief.
“Okay,” Sam says, “I’ve got a burly man with a sore head to tend to.”
My laugh is muffled behind my glass, but Sam catches it anyway.
“I miss laughing.” She sighs. “When this is all over, I’m making a point to laugh at least once a day.”
She ruffles my hair, and in a moment’s time, it’s just me and the wolves and the crackling of the fire.
Ruse yawns a few moments later, showing off her teeth, still stained with a tint of red.
“Want a refill?” Sorin saunters to my side, dangling a bottle in the air.
