“Hey, Chopsticks,” Ivan guffawed. “Hurry up.”
On her way back to the van, Leanna took a picture of the van with its license plate and the gas station with Pimply Toad, or Reuben, filling the van. She texted everything to Axe.
Then she turned on the map app and shared her location with Axe.
“Hey, I want a selfie too,” Patricia said. “I’ve never had a boyfriend. Reuben says we’re going to the diner next. He knows a good one with American breakfast burritos.”
Leanna giggled as she handed the phone to Patricia and gave Patricia a high five. “Let’s see what else we can get out of these three.”
“Remember, I’m not a slut,” Patricia said, crossing herself.
“Me neither, but it doesn’t hurt for them to think I’m useful,” Leanna said. She helped Juan pick Maria up from the ground and deposit her in the back of the van.
By the time they got to the diner, Maria was barely awake. They propped her up inside the booth, leaning against the window.
After they ordered, including Maria, who by now was raving hungry, Leanna tapped her coffee cup on the table to get everyone’s attention.
“Here are the rules,” Leanna said. “We are paying for safe transit to the border. In addition, any one of you will get a reward if you find Carmelita Bandera. This includes Maria and Patricia, since they’re with us. On the way, we will pretend to be three boyfriend and girlfriend couples. That way, we won’t draw attention of the police. The girls will sleep together in one motel room with comfortable beds and you guys will be in your own room or if you prefer to sleep in the van, that’s your choice. We will be treated like tourists until we get to the border.”
“And then what?” Patricia asked. “How will we get across?”
“Fake IDs,” Leanna said. “It’s much easier than swimming, tunneling, or riding in a trunk.”
“I never had a girlfriend,” Pimply Reuben said. “This is going to be fun.”
“Hey, wait a minute.” Scabby gave his overweight friend a shove. “We haven’t decided who gets who.”
“I thought we chose already,” Blue Skull Ivan said. “I get Leanna.”
“No, I’m the boss. I get first dibs,” Juan said.
“Why do you always get to go first?” Leanna asked. “Who told you to be so bossy?”
“Because I’m the smartest.” Scabby blew through his gapped teeth.
“How about you guys arm wrestle for it?” Leanna suggested.
Scabby rubbed his no doubt sore arms and sneered. “No, we do math problems.”
“Then I win,” Reuben said.
“You only win if we’re lighting matches in back of your farts,” Juan said.
“Wait, wait, wait,” Leanna interjected. “I bet Reuben comes up with the best passwords. Ones no one can guess.”
“That’s right,” Reuben crowed. “You two use your names spelled backwards.”
“That’s not true,” Ivan said. “I use numbers like on a keypad.”
“You mean you spell I.V.A.N. in numbers? Ohhh, you’re so smart,” Leanna interjected. “Bet you never forget your PIN.”
“Nope, never.” Ivan pointed to his bald skull. “But Juan’s always forgetting.”
“Okay, enough.” Juan slammed the table with his fist. “Let’s eat and get out of here. That waitress has been looking at us funny. She might report us.”
“Well, then, time for more acts,” Leanna said. “Let’s take some selfies. I love selfies.”
She tapped Patricia for her phone and waved at the waitress. “Miss, can you take a picture of us? We’re having a great time traveling through this wonderful state of Nuevo Leon.”
“What agringa,” Patricia muttered as she handed over her phone.
“Say cheese, or should I sayqueso?” Leanna grinned.
