I blinked, pushing away the doubts I’d been having lately. Nothing had changed. Thinking it had was only my imagination working overtime. “My mind is wondering why you’re not in this bed with me.”
He grinned as he slid next to me. “Let me show you where my mind is, beautiful girl.”
“Yes, please.” He put his thumb on my bottom lip, and keeping my eyes on his, I sucked it into my mouth. I wished I could take a picture of him right now to keep with me. In some country, on some night when I was missing him—because I knew that was going to happen—I’d take it out and remember how he watched me, his eyes all soft and hungry for me.
“You’re killing me, looking at me like that,” he whispered into my ear.
“I don’t think I’ve ever killed a man before just by looking at him, but I’m sure going to try to render you comatose tonight.” I slid my hand down his chest, past his stomach, to his hard shaft, and wrapped it around him. He groaned right before his mouth crashed down on mine.
Hourslater I lay on my side, watching Dylan sleep. I wanted to memorize everything about him. How the tension lines next to his eyes had disappeared, making him look younger. How his mouth was slightly parted, his full lips one of my favorite features. They were lips that begged a girl to kiss them. I smiled, thinking that I pretty muchhadrendered him comatose.
After the way we’d gone at it, I should be worn-out and sound asleep, but my eyes were wide open and my brain was going to short circuit. As soon as Autumn and Brian were married, I’d get on a plane and leave. Nothing and no one was going to get in the way of that happening. Not even Dylan. And that was my problem.
My heart was trying to fall for him, and I had to put a stop to that. This trip wasn’t just about me. It was also my promise to my sister on her deathbed to make our shared dream come true. Somewhere on some foreign beach, she was waiting for me. If I fell in love with Dylan, I wouldn’t be able to leave him. My gaze traveled over him. He had the cover pushed down to a few inches below his waist. I hovered my hand over his chest, wanting to feel him against my palm. Instead I pulled away, afraid I’d wake him.
I didn’t know what to do. Stop seeing him altogether, or at the very least, slow things down. Not spend every night at his place like I’d fallen into the habit of doing. If I put some distance between us, I could better protect my heart, which even now screamed in protest at this idea. I needed time to think, and I couldn’t do that here, lying next to him.
There had been something desperate in the way his eyes had locked on me as his body covered mine, almost like he was memorizing me. Was he already thinking of my departure? For the first time since I’d had this dream to travel the world, I wasn’t bouncing in my seat, raring to go.
As quietly as possible, I slipped out of bed, grabbed my camisole and boxers, and then made my way to the living room. After slipping on my clothes, I sat on the sofa, wrapping the afghan Dylan kept on the arm around me. Moonlight came in through the glass doors, enough that I could easily see my surroundings. Dylan’s owl hooted in the distance, and I was even going to miss hearing him.
“You can’t sleep either?” I asked Daisy when she padded into the room, sitting at my feet. She whined. “Ah, you think I should have stayed in bed with your daddy? Is that it?”
She put her chin on my knee, staring up at me with those soulful brown eyes. “I don’t know what to do,” I confided to her as tears fell down my cheeks.
I scratched her nose, and she crawled onto my lap even though she knew she wasn’t supposed to be on the sofa. It was as if she understood that offering her doggy love was more important than furniture rules. Or maybe she just didn’t like tears. I didn’t like them either, but they always came when I thought of Natalie. God, I missed her with an ache that would never go away.
“I can’t break my promise to my sister, Daisy. Tell me you get that.”
36
~ Dylan ~
Iwasn’t Daisy, but I got it. What little hope I’d had that Jenny might give up her plans to take off were crushed at hearing her conversation with my dog. I backed up in the hallway, returning to my bedroom.
If she hadn’t made a deathbed promise, would she have decided to stay? It had sounded like she would have at least considered it. A part of me understood her need to keep the promise, but another part resented that someone now dead meant more to Jenny than I did, and I was a bastard for thinking that.
Even sound asleep I’d reached for her, finding only a cold sheet where she should have been. Truthfully I was glad I’d heard her talking to Daisy. Until tonight there’d been that little sliver ofmaybein my mind. Funny. I loved being in love, but for whatever reason, the fates were apparently aligned against me. Having a slew of women’s numbers in my contact list didn’t appeal to me. I wanted to love a woman who loved me back, and only me. One I could trust not to find another man in our bed when I returned from a trip.
I thought Jenny could be that woman. Unfortunately she had a promise to keep. And that was still my hang-up about telling her I’d wait for her to return home. I refused to be the reason she felt guilty if she met a man on her travels that she wanted to bring back to her hotel room.
Jenny never came back to bed, and I passed the remainder of the night planning how I’d begin to step away from her. I did my best to ignore the ache in my chest, and I absolutely ignored the burning in my eyes.
Always an early riser, I walked out to my living room at six, expecting to see Jenny curled up on the sofa. She wasn’t there. In the kitchen I found a note taped to the coffee maker. Snatching it, I scanned the words.
Good morning, Dylan.
I have a ton of errands to run today for Autumn, so I’m taking off early. The coffee’s ready to go, just push start. Last night was amazing. You’re one hot cop. Just wanted you to know that. So, I’m going to be really busy helping Autumn get ready for her wedding. I might not get to see as much of you as I’d like before I leave. I’ll call you.
Jenny
She was as much as running. After overhearing her conversation with Daisy, I shouldn’t have been surprised. I read the note one more time before crushing it in my hand. Damn it. Hadn’t I decided only hours ago to do the same thing…put distance between us? I put my hands on the counter and bowed my head. Evidently my heart wasn’t very good at protecting itself.
Daisy whined, nudging my leg with her nose. “Don’t ever fall in love, Daisy my girl. No good will come of it.” She barked, which I took as agreement. I could just stand here, feeling sorry for myself, but I had a big day ahead of me. There was a police captain I had to deal with and a mayor’s daughter to arrest.
Isatin a corner booth in Mountaintop Pancake House waiting for the mayor. My mood wasn’t good.
“Morning, Chief.”
