We put in our orders, two dragon rolls for me and two Hawaiian rolls for her, Skyla’s go-to staple.
How do you like that?
I lean back in my seat and stare her down.
“Why?” It pumps from me before I can decide if I want to go there.
“Oh, Gage.” She gives a sly wink. “I bet you really think you’ve pulled off some big psychological coo. Testing me with sushi.” She shakes her head. “You knew I’d do just about anything to get a bona fide aquarium floating in my belly. And here I am, with you.”
“So it’s true.”
“You seem to need an awful lot of validation these days, Gage. I’m not here to validate your doubts. I’m here for the fish.”
My features harden. I don’t like this version of her.
“Skyla.” My eyes close a moment, and I see her there in my mind’s eye, laughing at me, angry as hell at the very same time. But when I glance across the table one again, there she is in Chloe’s skin. “Nice move.” I lift my glass her way. “And now it makes sense why you came at me like that—why you hugged the boys and told them what you did. But my first clue was when you said that I took everything good I had from Skyla, Logan, and Chloe. I thought,why would Chloe say her own name?And then you filled in the gaps for me. By the way, that ass beating was for the ages. Impressive.”
She frowns over at me. “Chloe wants me to tell you that she was perfectly capable of coming at you like that all on her own, but she didn’t care enough to do it.”
“I am well aware. Only you have that much passion for me, Skyla. Because unlike Chloe, you care.” I lean in as a flood of emotion rides through me, and tears come to my eyes right along with a genuine rage. “Skyla—” Her name comes from me, tense and tight, the way it used to while our bodies were conjoined as one. And as odd as it sounds, I feel the same surge of passion pulsating through me at the moment. Yes, she hates me. But at the nexus of her feelings for me, there is love. I believe it. Iknowit.
She grunts as she sags in her seat. “I pluck your eye out and you equate that with me caring for you?” Her brows hike a notch, and there is something about that simple facial expression that differentiates her from Chloe.
Skyla has permeated Chloe’s frame so completely, she’s transforming Chloe’s hard shell to something softer, something that I could love without question. Yes, you could place Skyla’s soul in just about anyone’s body, even Chloe Bishop’s, and I will love her—forever, without hesitation, the end. My love for her is infallible, indestructible, immeasurable by time or space. We are eternal, and that is exactly why I’m protecting her, us, and our children. I am loving her the best way I know how.
Her expression sours once again. “What wickedness are you spinning in that twisted mind of yours? I can see your wheels turning, your gut churning. It’s palpable, Gage. You’re constantly on the evil move. You don’t let yourself rest. You are incapable of stopping. It’s not Demetri who has his hold on you. He’s not that good, not that powerful. Something else is gnawing on your balls. It’s me, isn’t it? It’s the boys.”
I flinch when she calls me out on it.
Our food arrives, and we both ignore the fact.
She leans forward, her head tipping to the left, mimicking Skyla’s mannerisms to a T. Although in this case, I suppose she’s not mimicking.
“Take off the gloves, Gage,” she whispers. “Remove the patina of hate and step outside of your skin, your sins for a moment, and just be you. Remember the kids, remember whatever the heck links you to a better world, the better version of yourself. Think of simpler times. I don’t think there is a soul in the universe that you can take one relaxing breath with. Not even yourself. You know it’s true.” She tips her head back, her gaze still tragically pinned on mine. “It must be exhausting walking around in that coat of wickedness. It’s heavier than hell, smells like fear and despair. It creates a hot and cloistering existence. And it’s ill-fitting, but you can’t figure out why.” Her features harden, looking every bit like the nasty Bishop that face was designed for. “I’ll tell you why. Because it wasn’t meant for you. You have become everything Demetri hoped you would be. And do you want to know the kicker? He’s probably stunned that he pulled it off so flawlessly. In fact, I bet you’ve outperformed his expectations. You always were an overachiever.”
A dull laugh thumps through me.
“Funny.” I push my plate away an inch. “We’re both overachievers. I think that’s what made us good together.”
“Or good enough for you to fool me into having your children.” She shakes her head, and I marvel at the fact I’m able to look right past Chloe and see Skyla,feelSkyla. “But that’s not what happened. It’s the narrative someone somewhere wants me to believe. The puppet masters have determined that I should hate you. That I should destroy you like you utterly destroyed me. And I agree with those things.”
Those words are delivered like a knife to the gut, sharp and unexpected, but they are the truth and I need to accept that.
She takes a breath and nods. “I know. It hurts you on some level to hear those words. It is most certainly not what you wanted, but it is exactly what you set out to do. I know this because I do believe you are on two opposing paths. Your heart was left behind a long time ago. You buried it in that house we bought, in our bed that night, our last night as who we thought we were.”
“Who we thought?” A smile flits on my lips. I’m not too surprised she chose those words, but they hurt as much as the truth did.
“What’s your narrative?” There’s a dare in her eyes. She’s baiting me with her words. And as much as I don’t want to admit it, I’m falling for it.
“We had everything. You were my family before we ever met. I knew you. I saw your face in my thoughts, in my dreams. I waited for you.” I nod to the girl whose likeness she’s all but stolen. “Chloe was in the running before that. And to tell the truth, had you never infiltrated my thoughts it would have been her.”
Her body bucks as if it were involuntary.
She closes her eyes a moment. “Chloe has a lot to say about that. Neither of us is sure if we’re buying it, but we’re on the road. Let’s see where it leads?”
“Fine.” It comes out angry as if they were forcing a confession out of me, but I think we all know nobody forces me to do anything. “I had an eye on Chloe. Nothing serious, but you can’t deny she’s a beautiful girl. That’s why, when she befriended me the way she did, it felt natural. But by that time, I already knew I was destined for another. It was you, Skyla. My heart bought everything about you hook, line, and sinker. I was done. There was no turning back. There was nothing forced about it. So you see, if you truly believe I drank the Kool-Aid Demetri’s been dishing out as far back as my birth, you would be wrong. I have complete command of my thoughts, my desires, and my actions. I operate as a free agent. I decide when I hold on and when I let go.”
She gives a long blink. “Like when you hold onto your sanity and when you let it go like a cheap party balloon? And here it’s blown up in all our faces.”
