Caleb nudges me, and I turn my head to find my brother’s brows raised as he glances to Zoey. His hard stare darts to our hands. A part of me wants to laugh.
“I’m just enjoying the show,” I shout above the music, and he winces as if I struck him. It’s true, though. I’m enjoying the hell out of it with this gorgeous woman by my side. Everything about Zoey is easy. Being with Elizabeth was the equivalent of climbing a mountain with an eighty-pound backpack weighing me down—always dressing the part, playing it up for the world, trying to bury our misery under the radar. And then, like a lightning bolt it hits me. It truly was miserable with Elizabeth. I never wanted to admit it. We fit. We were the perfect couple who knew all the right people and went to all the right parties. We had our future mapped out before us, bland as oatmeal. And for the first time since that horrible day we severed ties, I feel an overwhelming sense of relief.
The Bitter Hearts come out, and the entire auditorium jumps to their feet as a raucous applause roars throughout the hall. Zoey and Kennedy bump hips as they dance up a storm to the band’s opening number, but I’m not paying attention to the band. Heck, I can’t get my head around the music. All I see is Zoey. After a quick set, we settle in our seats as the music grows mellow and so does the crowd. Zoey plays with my hand as she watches the stage, mesmerized, making tiny looped patterns with her finger over my palm. The band drones on, but I’m already out of the hall and halfway back to Loveless in my mind—all I can think about is racing this girl to the nearest bed.
This is exactly what I didn’t want to happen. My plan of action was never to seduce Zoey—never to have her seduce me, even though she’s a natural in that arena. It was to kick-start a friendship with someone who seemed just as lonely as me, and here we are, hand in hand, my dick at the ready. It doesn’t look like I can do a damn thing right.
She spins into me, those catlike eyes of hers poised to claim their victim, her little pink tongue doing a quick revolution over her lips. “I’m thirsty.” She nods toward the exit. “You want to come with me?”
Something in me says don’t do it. I’m too amped up. Maybe it was the wine I had with dinner. Maybe it’s the nostalgic music bleeding through the speakers. Or just maybe it’s the fact that both Ace and Caleb have deemed her a no-fly zone. Nevertheless.
“Let’s go.” I lean in over. “Anyone want a drink?” I make the obligatory offer as I rise out of my seat. No takers, so I help Zoey navigate through the crowd, with my hand tucked in the small of her back on the way to the concession stand.
Zoey stops short and pulls me into the first hall we come by and ducks us behind a darkened partition.
My arms find their way around her waist. “Are you taking the long way? Or is this how you get a beer around here?” My face comes dangerously close to hers as her eyes glint in this dull light, pale as the sky on a clear Loveless morning.
Zoey bubbles with a soft laugh that strums through my arms like voltage. “Who said anything about a beer?” Her finger finds its way over my lips as all of her attention streamlines right over my mouth. “I said I was thirsty.” The words pull from her in slow motion as her lids hang heavy with anticipation.
“What are you thirsty for?” I whisper right over her lips, teasing her, backing up a notch to find her with a look of wanting that I cannot remember ever invoking in a woman before.
“This.” Her eyes close and I watch as long as I can before her lips touch mine, and like an explosion, we detonate in one another’s mouths. This, right here, is the moment that verifies, it testifies against me. I’ve taken a step across that invisible line in the sand. I’m in too deep with the beautiful girl probing around my mouth with an aggression I’ve never felt before.
My hands find their way up the back of her short dress as my fingers press into her thighs. Zoey tastes like strawberries and soda, a sweet and delicious combination that would never have been possible with Elizabeth. She was piss and vinegar till the end in every caustic way. As quick as my ex enters my mind, I sweep her back out. I’ve never wanted anyone as desperately as I want Zoey. That relationship depended on variables, on what mapped out best and logically. This one is tilting dangerously on the tip of a blade. In the beginning, I would have done anything to keep the two of us from lacerating ourselves, but now here we are free-falling over the steepest cliff with nothing but razors waiting for us below. The only way to stop this fornicating runaway train is to leave Loveless and never look back, but the thought wrenches me on the inside like a fist tightening around my heart. I can’t do to Zoey what I did to Elizabeth. This is different. Zoey is the anti-Elizabeth, and that might be exactly why I crave her so damn much.
“Here you are!” a female voice rides high as a hand slams down over my shoulder, prying the two of us apart. We glance up to find Kennedy gloating with a cheesy grin. “The beer’s on me, kid.” She winks at Zoey while pulling her toward the concession stand. “Pour it over your head. It’ll cool you off faster that way.” She winks over at me as they disappear into the crowd, and I catch a glimpse of Caleb standing off to the side with his arms crossed over his chest, doing his best impression of a pissed father.
I get it. He doesn’t want to see me hurt. He doesn’t want to see Zoey hurt either.
I take off for the bathroom as I try to figure out why the hell anyone needs to get hurt to begin with.
The rest of the concert goes off with just as much nostalgic enthusiasm as it started with. Zoey and I hold hands as if it were seventh grade, and it feels nice. It feels perfect.
We head to the parking lot, and the girls hug it out. Caleb nods me over.
“You sure you know what you’re getting into?” His voice is low and serious as if delivering bad news.
“Yes. I’m getting into nothing.” My stomach boils in its own acids as if contesting the idea.
“If you say so. And would you lose the watch,” he teases. “You’re the last one wearing it.” He gives me a shove to the arm, and I take up Zoey’s hand as we make our way to the car.
The night winds down with a quiet drive back to Loveless, the purple mountains in the distance glowing unnaturally, holding its secrets like a poker hand.
We finally hit the dirt lot I’ve been parking my car in just shy of the lake, and I help Zoey out. The stars above drip like honey down over the water, their reflections shining like a thousand fallen suns.
Zoey hikes up on her tiptoes and presses a kiss to the side of my face. “You ready for the real show to begin?”
My boxers tick at the prospect. “What show is that?”
“The one in which you lie down for me.” She takes a step back with her finger pressing into the ruby cushion of her lips. “So that I can sketch you—you pervert.” Her hand slaps over my chest playfully as she runs off. I jog ahead, snatching her up, landing her in my arms, laughing as the night jasmine perfumes the air around us.
Zoey pegged me. I am a damn pervert around this girl.
We walk the shoreline hand in hand with the electric hum of nightlife around us.
Everything is electric and alive with Zoey around.
For the first time in years, so am I.
Maybe the past can be encapsulated after all.
Deep down, I know it can’t.
