8
Caught in the Middle With You
Baya
“You’re an asshole!” I scream at my brother at the top of my lungs.
More pounding ensues from the apartment next door, but I really don’t give a shit if the entire building crumbles because of my outburst. I scan the area for something solid to throw and spot a beer bottle off in the corner.
“Baya,no,” he shouts as I wield it like a machete.
“Well, I say,yes, for once.”
He steps toward the television, and I hurl it, missing his face and hitting the screen instead. A large spider web of a crack stares back at me in its place, and I’m damned impressed.
“You fuckingbrokeit.” He straightens, pulling himself out of the moment. “Baya, come here.” His voice softens. He’s back to being his sweet self, and, to be honest, not a single part of me wants to be mad at this version of my brother. “Baya, I care about you. Trust me, the last person you want to be with is Bryson Edwards. The guy’s a slime.”
“No, he’s not.” I pull my hands over my hips. “Take it back. I really care about him, Cole. And, if you cared about me like you say you do, you would let me be with whoever I please.”
“What the hell?” He says it mostly to himself, obviously shocked at the idea of me having my own opinion. “Baya, the guy is a jerk. He beds girls for fun. Look”—he walks me over to the scoreboard—“he keeps track of them on the wall like its some kind of game.” His eyes bulge when he says it. He’s so convincing, it frightens me.
“And whose score sheet is this?” I point to my brother’s side of the wall, who, by the way, is blowing smoke in the face of the competition.
“He told you?” A guilty look crosses his face.
“Yes, he told me. We don’t have any secrets.”
“Really?” His brows pinch. His dimples depress. “So I suppose he told you all about Stephanie.” His head ticks back a notch as if daring me to say it was true.
An entire dam of words gets locked in my throat.
“No.” It comes from me in defeat. “He will though. When he’s ready.”
“So you don’t know what’s been eating at this guy for the last five years, turning him into some kind of sperm dispenser, but you’re willing to get on your knees for him?”
I try to say something to defend Bryson—to defendme, but it feels as if an ex-girlfriend-shaped boulder has lodged in my throat. Tears start to come, and I snatch my bag off the floor and run out the door.
“Baya wait.” Cole follows me down the stairwell, but my feet don’t stop moving. We hit the cool night air, and I run all the way across the street back to Whitney Briggs where I should’ve been in the first place. “I’m not leaving you alone. It’s four in the morning.” The haze blows out of his mouth like steam as he pants alongside me. “You know I love you, right?”
I stop in my tracks and just stare at my brother a very long time as the sky brightens a pale shade of lavender. He has the same dark wavy hair, piercing green eyes as my father, same dimples, too and my heart breaks because not only do I miss my father, but I miss the old Cole, the one I thought I knew.
“No, I guess I don’t know that you love me.” I swallow hard. “I mean you always told me how to act, and who to spend my time with, but you’ve never used those words.”
Cole pulls me in and sniffs hard into my hair. His chest rattles with grief. “I do love you, Baya.” He pulls back, and the street lamp picks up the moisture in his eyes. “You’re my baby sister, and I only want what’s best for you.” His voice cracks with grief. “You deserve some nice kid who’s never even made it around the block, let alone entire neighborhoods. You’re amazing, and I want you to have a safe, and wonderful life.”
“You mean that?” I pull back as tears flood my vision.
“Of course, I mean that.” He warms my shoulder with his hand. “Now come back to the apartment with me before we both freeze to death.”
I hadn’t even noticed he was standing here in nothing but his boxers. I glance back at the tall, glittering building with lights peppered throughout the facility.
“It’s going to be awkward,” I whisper.
“I’ll leave him the hell alone, I swear. I just need to know you’re not wandering around campus at this insane hour.” He takes up my hand, and I let him. Cole walks me across the street and back into the warmth of the Briggs Apartment building.
“You know what I just realized?” I ask.
“What’s that?” He holds open the elevator for me.
