“Technically, I’m crashing with my brother Cole.” I glance to Laney. “And, to be honest, I don’t really care what Bryson’s harem might think.” True story. “Bryson and I are just buddies. And I’m quoting.”
“Ooh!” Laney perks to life at my battle cry. “Sounds like we went from a hot kiss to cold shoulder in a single bound.” Her dark brows swoop in like bats in flight. “You know he’s a notorious playboy, right? I wouldn’t bother pining for him. A leopard like Bryson can’t change his spots for anyone.”
“Can’t or won’t?” I’m not sure which is worse.
“Both.” Laney nods as if she knows him well enough to attest to his stance on commitment.
“That’s too bad.” I twirl the warm cup in my hand. “I mean, that kiss we shared was amazing.” It was like one long strung out orgasm that’s left my entire body throbbing for the past few days.
“Kiss as insingular?” Laney looks suspicious. “I’ve seen that boy in action. I don’t think that’s possible.”
“Oh, it is,” I’m quick to assure her of Bryson’s tongue twisting superpowers. “After the bar closed, we indulged in one, long, never-ending kiss that greeted the sun when it finally showed up. We sat right there in that parking lot for hours. It was magic.”
“Oh, hon”—Laney grimaces into the thought—“there’s a lot of false magic in the parking lot of a bar at three in the morning.” She says it with a heavy heart as if she knew firsthand. “He was probably feeling you out to see if he was about to get lucky.”
“And I would have happily let him.” I take a careful sip of my coffee as an image of me sitting naked on the hood of his truck blips through my mind. The list of things we could have done in that parking lot is endless. “But, the truth is, that kiss was sort of hard won. I practically had to beg. I guess he’s just not that into me.”
Laney and Roxy exchange looks before breaking out in a laugh.
“Have youseenyourself?” Laney’s eyes expand like silver dollars. “You’re a freaking brunette version of Barbie. Half the girls in Prescott Hall breathed a sigh of relief last weekend because they can finally bring their boyfriends around again.”
“Yeah, right.” I glance at the ceiling. “Half the girls at Prescott couldn’t pick me out of a line up.”
“Laney’s right.” Roxy leans in. “I’d question if Bryson’s dick were in working order if he wasn’t into you. Besides, I’ve seen the skanks he’s bedded, and trust me it’s not an impressive list. You’re like the Holy Grail compared to the slut spectacular he’s been starring in for years. Of course, he’d want you.”
“I’d like to think so, but a part a me just doesn’t believe it’s true.”
A blonde in skin-tight jeans and tall furry boots saunters in. She’s got on a giant fuzzy hat that looks as if she shoved a rabbit’s ass over her head and a tiny silk scarf sits neat around her neck like a choker. I recognize her from our bizarre early morning encounter the other day—Bryson’s latest not-so-greatest bed buddy, Jules.
“Speaking of skanks he’s bedded,” I whisper as she speeds on over.
“Saya?” Her dark eyes round out as she narrows in on me. Her sickly sweet perfume clots up the air, dowsing all the oxygen out of the room.
“Baya,” I correct.
“I don’t really care what your name is.” Her jaw clenches, and her entire head shakes like she’s eighty. “You missed the first day of rush and made me look like an a-s-s. Do you want in at Alpha Chi or not?”
“Y-e-s.” The thought of witnessing the parade of tramps walk in and out of my brother’s bedroom all semester makes my stomach turn. Not to mention the vocal effects that have seeped into my nightmares. Theoohs, theahhs, therightthere,faster,pleaseandthankyou, and my all-time favoritefuck me like a roadside bitch. And don’t even get me started on the screams and giggles, the moans and groans. I’ve dreamed of dying barn animals for three nights in a row. Thank God Bryson’s penis has voluntarily issued a cease and desist order to females everywhere while I’m squatting on their couch, or I’d literally go insane.
Jules sharpens her chocolate chip eyes at me. “The next meeting is Saturday night at nine. Don’teventhink of missing it. Alpha Chi needs you, and an Alpha never lets her sisters down.” She turns on her fuzzy heels and makes a beeline out the door.
“Alpha Chineedsyou,Saya” Laney mocks. “For the record, Jules Flannery is a j-o-k-e. I may have to disown you if you cross over to the dark side.”
“Bryson didn’t seem to think she was a j-o-k-e when she tumbled out of his b-e-d.” I chew on the inside of my cheek as an image of the two of them mattress dancing clouds my mind. “Anyway, she had it backward,Ineedthem. My roommate at Prescott is having marathon sex with real live human vibrators, and I can’t get any work done with all that grunting—her hairy ass suitorswavingat me while she bounces on their laps. We’re talking serious trampoline action—emphasis on the tramp.”
Laney and Roxy laugh until tears roll down their cheeks. It’s nice to know they’re easily entertained.
“I would have paid to see your face!” Roxy mimics the douchebag waving.
“Believe me, it’s not worth the price of admission,” I lament. “Besides, she’s been nothing but inconsiderate—evenhetook a little time out of the thigh thumping to acknowledge my presence. She hasn’t bothered to say good morningonce—well, at least not with her lips. I’ve sort of made friends with the Pointer Sisters—Thing One and Thing Two. They’re more than friendly with me.”
Roxy lights up the place with a high-pitched cackle.
Laney leans in with an incredulous look on her face. “Younamedthem?”
“I had to. It was getting lonely, and it was like they’re always trying to get my attention. They’re like two bloated puppies, happy to see me.”
Laney joins Roxy in the laugh fest once again, and any moment now I expect a puddle of urine to form around them.
