“I don’t know. This is happening so fast. I thought I would have a couple of weeks to prepare.”
“What is the point of waiting? I won’t pressure you, Hannah. But I think it is better if we get to know each other better here, while you are in familiar surroundings.”
“You may be right. I just don’t know...”
“Think about it. I will be waiting here tomorrow. If you don’t come, I’ll be disappointed, but I’ll understand. I will wait until you are ready.”
With that, he pulled back. Dropping his arms from around her was an exercise in self-discipline. He executed a brief bow before mounting his horse and riding off. Damn, it was hard leaving her. He could have seduced her. Overwhelmed her with desire until she agreed... No. He wouldn’t pressure her. As much as he wanted her, he wanted her to want him, too. To come to him of her own volition, without doubts or hesitation. He needed that.
CHAPTER 9
HANNAH RACED BACK HOMEto the security of her bedchamber. But her maid was there, and she had to endure the process of changing from her riding habit into her morning dress. All she wanted was to be left alone. Alone to ponder everything that had happened and what was still to come.
At last, she was alone, and she looked at herself in the mirror. She looked normal. The same as always. There was no exterior sign of the riotous hot emotions coursing through her. She thought her lips should be red. They still throbbed from the sensation of that kiss. But they were their normal dusky-rose hue. She touched her hand to her mouth, remembering the feeling of his lips on her. Oh God, it was amazing!
If she went forward with this plan, she would never survive it unscathed. With only one kiss, he had destroyed all her defenses and rendered her captive. Maybe she was primed and ready to be seduced. She had been sexually neglected for so long... But she suspected it was more than that.
Since the first time she met him five years ago, she had felt an affinity for him. Talking to him, dancing sometimes at balls, even flirting a little, was exhilarating. She had reveled in the sensations he aroused in her, the excitement, the joy. He made her laugh; he made her feel alive. It was as if everything was brighter, more interesting, more fun when he was around. She had missed those feelings all her life, and she had indulged in them with the earl, thinking them innocuous. After all, she wasin control of her emotions, and so was he. They both knew their place in life. There was nothing to worry about.
Except now they would have to interact on a deeper level. Their places would shift, the lines would blur, and it would be impossible to resist him. She had suspected it before. Now she knew. The infatuation she felt for the earl could turn into something much deeper. For her, at least. She knew men could have sex without their emotions being involved.
Dare she go forward with the plan and meet him tomorrow? This was insanity. It was too soon. But he was right. If they were to do this, what was the point of waiting? And wasn’t it better to get the deed done here?
Even in that regard, he was disarming her with his consideration. He wanted her to feel comfortable. To have the chance to turn back and change her mind with a minimum amount of fuss. But she knew she wouldn’t. If his lovemaking was anything like his kiss, she would never have the strength to refuse him. She would become enslaved. Craving him for eternity.
She would meet him tomorrow. But maybe the question was not whether she could go through with it, but whether she could do it without damage to her heart. How could she do that? She would be lost if she had to endure a slow, thorough seduction.
Maybe if she curtailed the amount of interaction needed. Expedite things, so to speak. She could have some enjoyment, but she didn’t need to revel and bask in it. That would be indecent, anyway. She had to remember the purpose of this was to conceive an heir to the dukedom, not for her to have an affair.
In fact, the act needed to procreate was simple enough. He just needed to insert his...rod in her, then deposit his seed. A kiss was much more involved. But they didn’t need to complicate the act. Just limit themselves to the penetration part...
A slight tremor went through her at that, and her core clenched in anticipation. But she forcefully dismissed the reaction. After all the sawing required for him to expel his seed, she would probably be ready to be done with him.
Yes, that was it. She would be friendly, warm, and welcoming. Let him know she accepted him in all ways and facilitate his job so that he could finish in an expedient manner and without deeper involvement needed.
CHAPTER 10
SUNRISE WAS BUT A PALEglow over the tops of the trees when Hannah hurried to the meeting place. She knew he had not left the house yet, for the horse he had used yesterday was still in the stables. Good. She hoped to make it to the folly before him. That way, she would have time to prepare for his arrival. She wore no drawers and had brought a little vial of massage oil in the pocket of her habit.
The sun was breaking through the horizon, painting the landscape in shades of pink, when she got to the folly and unlocked the door. Inside, she started the fire that was laid out in the fireplace. The space wasn’t big, but it was comfortably furnished as a place to rest and relax. She had a bookcase full of her favorite books, a desk in which to write letters or poems if the mood struck her, a chaise by the window, and against the opposite wall, a daybed covered with a soft coverlet and piled with cushions. It was the perfect place for their intended activities.
She unstoppered the vial, rubbed some oil on her genitals and got into the daybed with her habit still on. Then, once under the covers, she hiked her skirts up to her knees, to give him better access. Perfect. Now all she had to do was wait for him to arrive. He would find her ready, and her industriousness in facilitating the act would please him. It would prove to him she was willing and had no qualms about this.
Now if only he would hurry and arrive already, she would be grateful. The waiting was more nerve-wracking than thepreparation part, and she didn’t want to have the opportunity to work herself into a tizzy. She didn’t have to wait long, though. Within five minutes, she heard the hoofbeats of his horse approaching, and then a knock on the door.
“Come in,” she answered, and soon his figure was filling the doorway.
He looked a bit surprised to find her already in the bed. His gaze roamed the room, taking in the furnishings and the fireplace before returning to her with a somewhat bemused expression.
“This is quite the cozy place you have here,” he said, striding into the room after closing and locking the door behind him. He knelt by the fireplace and added another log to the fire.
“Yes, I designed it to be my little refuge. I always come here alone, to read or relax. To escape the duties of being a duchess for a bit.”
He looked at her with affectionate approval. “Thank you for sharing your special place with me.”
The way he said it made her think of another special place she planned to share with him soon, and her cheeks grew a little warm, either from embarrassment or excitement, she wasn’t sure. She wished he would just hurry to come to bed and get on with it already.
“Are you going to come to bed now?” The words rushed out of her, and she bit her lip in embarrassment.
