“You are still married to her. Our marriage is not valid anymore.”
“But she will never return. She is dead in the eyes of the world. We can continue on as we are. Pretend we never found out that she is alive.”
That had been the wrong answer. He had seen the hurt and disappointment in Olivia’s eyes.
“So you will not seek a divorce?” She said in a neutral tone.
“I can’t. Not without causing a great scandal that would expose Eloise and destroy her reputation and the life she’s forged for herself.”
“I see.”
That’s all she had said. I see. What did she see? Did she think he did not care about her? Dammit, he wished there was a way to free himself of any ties to Eloise, but he really couldn’t. Not without causing significant damage.
Finding Eloise, while good for his conscience, had driven a wedge between himself and Livvy. He knew she felt unsure of her position in his life, and he couldn’t blame her.
Now they both sat in his study. Her trying to read, him pretending to work. He couldn’t even concentrate enough to write a simple letter. Dale studied Olivia surreptitiously.
“You look distressed.” His voice made her look up.
She tried to smile reassuringly. “Distressed? No, merely a little pensive.”
“Deep, disquieting thoughts I would imagine them to be. You always get a little frown between your eyebrows when you are upset. Makes me want to kiss it away, along with whatever is distressing you.”
“I was thinking about my mom. I miss her. My dad too, and my little niece Lana. Today is the anniversary of my sister’s death in my time. That is, today’s date is when she died. I don’t know if it would qualify as an anniversary now, since technically it hasn’t even happened yet. I don’t know the meaning of time anymore. But I still miss her so much.”
It was not what he wanted to hear. It could hardly surprise him she missed her family, but he had hoped... what had he hoped for? That she would be so happy with him she would forget her loved ones? Absurd. He knew it. He could never replace her family, nor fill the void they would leave in her heart if she never saw them again.
It was an impossible situation. He had known it from the start. From the moment he first saw her, he lusted after her. When he got to know her better, he liked her. And from the moment they became intimate, he had been falling in love. It may have taken him a while to recognize the feeling for what it was. Even longer for him to admit it, but he could deny the truth no longer. He loved her with all his soul. Seeing Eloise again had made it crystal clear, for even at his most infatuated, he had never felt for Eloise the depth of feeling he felt for Livvy.
She was his perfect mate, in every sense of the word. When he was with her, he felt at ease, accepted, understood, and stimulated and more alive than ever. She soothed and inflamed at the same time. His world would be empty without her. And yet, if they found the way to return her to her time, he had to let her go. Because he loved her too damn much to want his happiness at the expense of hers.
But until, and if that moment arrived, he was going to love her so much, she would never forget him, no matter where life took them.
He stood and strode to her side, picked her up from the chair and sat in her place, nestling her snug and warm on his lap. She clung to him, burying her face in his shoulder.
“My poor darling,” he crooned in her ear. “I wish there was something I could do to make all your wishes come true. To bring you complete happiness, the way you do for me.”
She smiled crookedly. “Complete happiness doesn’t exist. Or at least, it doesn’t last very long. You make me as happy as I could be, more than I could have ever hoped for, under the circumstances.”
“Then, if it won’t last, let us enjoy happiness now. At this moment. This moment is perfect. We will create as many moments of perfect happiness while we still have time.”
He covered her mouth with his in a deep, all-consuming kiss. Her lips parted in welcome and he plundered inside, their tongues entwining and sliding in a sensual rhythm that destroyed his sanity. He couldn’t get enough of her, her taste, her essence, the feel of her in his arms. He was addicted and didn’t know how he would ever live without her, if it came to that.
He wouldn’t think about that right now. She was here now, with him, responding to his kiss with fevered urgency, inflaming him to madness. His hands roamed without conscious volition. They were already under her dress, caressing up her thighs, extracting and giving pleasure.
She broke the kiss to gasp. “Let’s go to the bedroom.”
He grunted, a sound that offered neither assent nor disagreement. He was too far gone for articulate speech. But she grabbed the sides of his face and looked into his eyes, capturing his attention. “Let’s go to the bedroom, Dale. We can’t continue to scandalize people by being found in compromising positions in public spaces.”
A sliver of sanity permeated his mind, and he realized she was right. In the last month, they had already been caught twice in very compromising positions. He was acting like the debauched cad his mother had accused him of being. Even worse than his father.
He turned his face into her hand and gave her an open-mouthed kiss in her palm. “You are right, of course,” he said. “Forgive me.”
She sucked in her breath. “No forgiveness needed. I’d just rather not be interrupted.”
“We are in total agreement.”
As if on cue, a knock sounded on the door. With great reluctance, they moved apart and stood, and Dale called permission to enter.
