“So the letter is hers?” Olivia asked softly, sympathy and pity coloring her tone.
“Without a doubt, this is her handwriting.”
“I feared so, but was hoping it would be older, from an ancestor maybe. I know it must be difficult to accept, but at least that explains why you had difficulties in your marriage.” She offered.
“This explains nothing!” Fury rapidly replaced the pain. “If anything, it opens up more questions. When did she meet and fall in love with this man, before or after marrying me? And when did she even have a chance to carry on an affair? Who is this person? Where is he now? How could I have been so wrong about everything? The one thing I never questioned was her fidelity. Despite the problems between us, I thought she was too virtuous to be unfaithful.” He shook with anger and betrayal and stunned disbelief.
“I was faithful to her. Ever since I married her, there was never another woman for me until you. I spent seven long years celibate, the five before that, in a passionless and unsatisfactory marriage, and I never strayed. How could she?”
“We don’t know if she was actually unfaithful. It might have been an infatuation. Or a platonic love. In any case, it is in the past. What intrigues me more is some of the things she said. She said her love was ‘forbidden’ and that she would like to run away. Dale, could she have been trying to run away with her lover that day?”
“What?! That is... that is... preposterous. Hideous. It would be an even worse betrayal. No, she wouldn’t have done that.”
“Perhaps, but if that was the case, it might ease your conscience about your role in her death.”
“Even if it’s true, what do you think I could do about it now? Look for her lover? I have no idea who he is. And for what? What purpose would it serve to find him?”
“To know the truth. To find peace.”
Peace. It was an elusive state. He thought he had achieved a measure of it with Livvy. But one visit from Lady Cavendish, and now this, was all it took to destroy his newfound peace.
He turned his back to her and went to the fireplace. Bracing one hand on the mantle, he stared at the glowing embers on the hearth, but his mind was far away. His jaw ached. He clenched it so hard a muscle ticked in his cheek.
Then Olivia’s gentle touch fluttered on his back, making gentle, soothing circles. His tension dissolved.
“Where would I even start?” he asked, voice ragged.
“The servants. They live here. They must know what is going on at all times, even if they act like they don’t. If questioned directly, they might provide useful information. Whether she had visitors, or corresponded with someone.”
“Her maid!” Dale said. “She would know all her secrets. She is not here anymore, of course, but it should not be difficult to locate her.”
“Yes, we definitely need to find her. Who else?”
“I think that’s a good start. I will summon Mrs Simmonds and Mr Harris, and we will question them. Then we’ll go from there.” He bowed his head, sighed. Torn between needing to know and wishing he could forget everything.
“I’m so sorry, Dale. I didn’t stop to think. Maybe I shouldn’t have shown you that letter. Let’s forget about it.”
He reached out and grabbed her hand. “No. It is better this way. Don’t worry about me. I’m fine.”
But he wasn’t. He wanted to go back to yesterday. Before Lady Cavendish, before this awful letter.
This morning he had woken up entwined in Livvy’s arms. He had found acceptance. He had been happy. But happiness without absolution was fragile. Easily destroyed. Now the past had come back to bite him and he wouldn’t have peace or happiness again until he found out the truth and, hopefully, redemption.
