“It’s… worrying. I suspected I might be stuck here… so that’s what I was doing earlier in the snow. It’s appearing more and more likely.”
Setting the pizza on the counter, Seth turns to lean his shoulder against my cabinets. God, he is so tall, he makes my kitchen look like it was made for children.
Stuck sounds… bad.
Stuck isn’t a word I love in association with me.
“What do you mean, stuck?” I linger in the entry to my kitchen, batting away the fluttering feeling of anxiety threatening to take over my body.
“I couldn’t go back home. Which, considering that I look likethis,presents a bit of a problem.” He sneers when he mentions how he looks, and I can’t help but feel annoyed. No one talks that way about my… whatever Seth is to me, not even him.
“Hey! I happen to like how you look.” Folding my arms and pursing my lips, I give him what I hope is a convincing glare.
“Well, that’s one good thing, I guess.”
“Also,” I say, smirking. “If you’re worried about anyone seeing you, let me tell you about the beauty of the modern day and how you don’t have to leave your house if you don’t want to!”
“Princess…” He moves to cup my face in his hands. “None of that. I mean, those skills might come in handy, but you don’twantto be trapped here… unless I’m way off?”
“Jerk.” I stick out my bottom lip. “No, I don’t want to.Obviously.ButI have the skills you need… You really can’t go back?”
He screws up his mouth before answering. “I don’t think so. It was the worst pain I’ve ever felt. There’s something keeping me here.”
“That sounds… horrible.” My voice comes out quieter, breathier, than I intended, but I don’twanthim to leave, and trying to go back feels… final somehow. Obviously I don’t want him to be stuck anywhere… but if he managed to get back, it sounds like he’d be gone… forever.
“I…” Seth runs a hand through his wavy hair, and several pieces fall in front of his mask. Geez, dude, could you not look so hot right now? “I need to think about a few things. And I think we need to talk about a few things.”
“There are worse ways to discuss things than over pizza!” I squeak.Needing to talksounds serious, and my stomach is flip-flopping all over the place. I suppose the giddy nervous feeling that is mixed in with the familiar dread is a nice change, at least.
I grab the pizza cutter out of the drawer and a few plates while he grabs the pizza. Once we’re seated at the table, I serve us each a few slices, waiting for Seth to speak. It’s strange, because his mask doesn’t move, but I’m starting to feel like I can still pick up on certain expressions somehow. Like if I stare hard enough, I could see his eyes back there, when they crinkle when he smiles, or when he opens them wider in surprise. Right now, he’s rubbing his hands on his pants, and I would bet a fair bit of money that he’s looking up at the ceiling… making me think he must be nervous, too.
“When I left the other night, after the cookies, I barely made it back. I knew I needed to be careful, because otherwise, I might get stuck.”
“Oh no…” That flip-flopping stomach falls flat inside me. “And by asking you to come…”
“No. Bychoosingto come,I’vetrappedmyself here. Permanently.” He levels his gaze at me. “But Ada, that’s a choice I made. I didn’t have to come, and you didn’t know the consequences.”
Shit. If he’s using my real name, he’s serious. “I know, but Iaskedyou?—”
“And I’m so fucking glad you did.” Seth sets his slice down and stands, walking around to lift me from my chair and set me on his lap. “If youhadn’tasked me?” His voice breaks, and he has to clear his throat before he can continue. “I’d never have forgiven myself if something had happened to you.”
“What’s… what’s keeping you here? Do you know?”
Pressing his lips together, he nods. “Yeah.” He takes a deep breath. “You, I’m pretty sure.”
My stomach falls to my feet. Fuck. I did this to him. I’ve trapped him—I’m his literal jailer. I squirm to get off his lap, but he holds me fast.
Scowling and fighting back tears, I glare at him. “You—you shouldhateme.”
“Princess, I’m incapable of hating you.” His voice is thick with emotion, like he might be crying behind his mask. “I needed you to be safe.”
I reach a hand into his hair, pressing his forehead to mine. “I was so scared. I was worried he’d hurt me. I was worried that I’d made you up and that I was crazy. But most of all, I wassoworried that I’d call and you just… wouldn’t care.” I sniffle.
Amazing, now my nose is going to be bright red… again. He’s going to think that dream Ada was a catfish and that this is how I look all the time.
He chuckles, a noise that settles low in my belly. It’s not the time for sex—we need to talk—but I can’t help but want him, every bit of him.
“I couldn’t have resisted coming even if I'd tried.” He rubs his thumb across mycheek. “You know, I thought I just wanted you to be happy so I could stop being this. My friends tried to convince me I was in love with you, or at least obsessed with you. But no, I thought everyone else’s dreams just tasted horrible. I thought I needed you to be happy so I could change. But really, I needed you to be happy because you’ve overwritten my soul. With you, I found the person Iwantedto be with… every other dreamer felt hollow.”
