‘You,’ I breathed. It was the truth, but I didn’t want him because of any feeling; it was because he was familiar, a place where I felt comfortable and almost whole—but not quite—for a few brief moments. I had tried to sleep with others, but there was always something missing. I wanted Visarous because he wanted all of me in a way that others didn’t, they had only wanted a taste of my power. It was never truly about him.
He took another step towards me, closing the distance between us, wrapping his hand around my hip while his other thumb stroked my bottom lip. His lips met the nape of my neck as he grazed his teeth over the surface of my skin. Drawing his lips to my ear, he breathed the next question slowly.
‘Now, do you want me?’
My core clenched as his teeth grazed my earlobe; he tilted my chin towards him, his piercing blue eyes hungry.
‘Visarous,’ I breathed, reaching out to stop him, but the sound of his name on my lips snapped any restraint within him as his lips crashed into mine. His tongue found mine as I parted my lips, consuming each other in a ravenous dance. He dropped a hand between my thighs, trailing higher and higher until I could feel his fingers stroking and teasing me through the thinnest barrier of clothing. I gripped his shoulder as my body shuddered with pleasure. Both of his hands grabbed my legs and hoisted me up, wrapping my legs around him he walked to the wall and slammed me hard against it. Pinning me in the air as he moved his hips between my legs, I could feel the hard shape of him screaming for me, wanting me. Wanting to be inside me, and in that moment, I wanted him inside me. The escape the physical afforded my mind.
I started pulling at his belt as he let out a devious laugh at how quickly I had folded to my desires, to him and his body. Visarous bit my lower lip as he pulled his belt free and unbuttoned his pants. I went to undo my own, but he stopped me and set me back on my feet.
‘Uh-uh, Skylar, you are not getting what you want this time. Today is about what I want,’ he said as he pulled out the length of his member. It was hard and dripping with need. I could almost feel it pulsing against the wall.
He gripped the back of my head and pulled me down onto my knees. I knew what he wanted. It’s not something I had ever given to him. I had never, in all our times together, ceded any control or power—not really—and I definitely had never knelt for him. Our relationship had been about serving me, not his own wants and needs, but he had made it clear he could no longer accept that. Perhaps because I was running from the reality of Cain’s words, I decided to oblige. I needed as muchdistance as possible from Demir, and maybe this one act would damage that inescapable bond. Maybe my submission to another would prove I could never submit to my enemy. I opened my mouth and enveloped him, drawing him in deeply. His fingers tangled through my hair as he let out a soft moan and gripped the wall to steady himself. He was warm, smooth, and hard in my mouth. I relished the taste.
His muscles tensed with every lick and suck. I had long refused this thinking it was a loss of control but in this moment I realised I had complete and utter control over how his body reacted and what it did. I took him to the edge, then eased off, watching the desperation in his eyes—a crescendo that never peaked.
‘Fuck Skylar, don’t do this to me,’ he said as I trailed the tip of my tongue over the tip of his length. Gently, I grazed my teeth over it. His body convulsed in pleasure.
‘Beg,’ I said, an order and a challenge.
‘Please, Sky, please—oh gods, please. Finish me, I can’t breathe from how much I want you, need you, need me inside of you. God, you drive me fucking crazy. Please!’
With that, my mouth widened and took in the length of him until he hit the back of my throat. I moved quickly, my tongue stroking his length, the wetness pooling until I felt his whole-body tense, his breath stopped and a warmth spread inside my mouth. It was thick and smooth but something in me rejected it. I spat it on the floor in front of me, refusing to swallow and claim him in that way.
He dropped to his knees and kissed me. It was an intimate, vulnerable kiss. Not the rapid push and pull we normally engaged in. This conveyed his tenderness towards me and something about it made my skin crawl.
‘Satisfied?’ I asked.
He smiled. ‘Never, not with you. I’ll always want more, Sky. More than what you can give me.’ A pained look met my gaze.
‘If it comforts you to know, I have not found my soul bonded one. I simply wanted to know more as Cain had come across some research in the libraries. He spoke of the Water Whisperers and Morgadians but thought you might know something he didn’t about our people from your research at the temples,’ I said.
Believing the excuse I had given him for my curiosity, he told me what he knew. ‘I did come across something from a single scroll during the rebuild of the first temple, and no other texts substantiate it, but it said that unlike us Skin Seepers and Fae, it was common for the dragons of old to find their soul bonded mate and be with them for eternity. The scroll says that soul bonding occurs when two people, who are two halves of a whole, meet one another and share one soul. It is primal; it is ancient magic bestowed by the dragons and is unshakeable. There is nothing in this world that can create it or break it. It transcends all known magic. Those of the royal bloodline who descend from the first dragons, like yourself, do not feel a primal pull; instead, it is described as a warmth felt in their presence and a coldness in their absence emulating the comfort of the eternal flame. Like a dragon's fire, keeping you warm but turning cold when they are away to show you the wrongness of being apart. Once someone of your bloodline finds their soul bonded, the flame is known to bestow the ability to read their thoughts but not other gifts; however, this gift apparently doesn’t extend to those who aren’t Skin Seepers, making it a one way connection. Only one leader ever bonded outside of the Skin Seepers, and that was more than two hundred years ago.’
I paled, feeling sick to my stomach. Not only was I Demir’s soul bonded, but he was mine. My body began to shake. Visarous, thinking I was cold, pulled me up to my feet and ushered me to our room. I barely registered the hall or the faces of those we passed.
Once we were back in our room, I ran for the bathroom theinstant I could and vomited all over the sink. I held on to the edges of the copper and stared at myself in the mirror.No, no, no! How could this be happening? Why had the spirits and dragons of old played such a sick joke on me? Why must every step of my life be filled with difficulties?
I spent the next three hours in the bathtub, refilling the hot water every time it became cold. Visarous and Viv knocked on the door from time to time to see if I was alright, but I barely heard them. My mind swam with the devastating news I had just come to learn. Demir and I were of one soul.How could it be?Perhaps that was why I had been so broken all along; I was never whole to begin with, but I could never be with him. I would never want to be with him. The son of the man who killed my family and my people. Demir himself was responsible for much of my torment at the Academy. I could never feel anything but disdain for him. But last night, I had felt something more; he had comforted me. But as much as my body may have relaxed into his, my mind screamed,No!
When I finally left the bathroom, I felt lightheaded from the hot water and nearly fell to the floor. Visarous caught me, but I quickly scrambled away. The idea of him or any man touching me after what I had learnt disgusted me now. My skin crawled at the thought of any kind of physical touch from another person. I almost felt guilty for what Visarous and I had done in the temple. What was wrong with me? I didn’t want Demir, I had never wanted him but knowing what I knew now, something in me began to shift now that I was conscious of the bond. I was consumed and overwhelmed; I almost wished for the panic to strike me, to ruin me so I could be lost, even for a moment, and not plagued by these thoughts. I needed a distraction. Acheron and Viv sat on her bed. She looked at me with concern so I did what I do best and deflected.
‘You seem oddly calm about your sister and Acheron being together. How long have you known?’ I asked Visarous.
He shifted uncomfortably before answering. ‘Always.’
‘Great, so everyone decided to lie to me only. Wonderful. A council full of people who deceive me, who I can’t trust. Just the team I need supporting me through this war. No wonder we haven’t made any fucking headway,’ I said sarcastically.
Acheron came to stand in front of me. ‘I’m sorry, it was my doing. I didn’t dream you would ever accept me, especially given my family,’ he said.
‘Skylar, can you blame us? You have spent years in a bloodlust-filled haze; there was no reasoning with you. We thought it was best. We do understand why you no longer trust us, but we will fix this,’ Viv said.
Visarous spoke next. ‘She’s my sister. I didn’t want to see her die,’ he admitted, looking away.
‘And I am only your queen,’ I sneered. Too exhausted to argue this anymore, I crawled into bed and let sleep take a hold of me, dragging me into a welcome, familiar darkness.
I walkedthe grounds in the early morning, as Cain was now heading back to Voldina with Jade. The sun was still hiding and the air was thick with fog. I went to the stables to check on Vixen and give her a brush. I had neglected her a touch since we had arrived. Too much had happened. Hugging her neck, she nuzzled into me. I held on tight, not wanting to let go.
