‘Putain…Surreal.’
‘I bet you never had such a view.’
‘Keep some of the credit, Charles.’
‘Yes? What percentage? Wasn’t it a bit sloppy?’
‘I’m gonna review it someday but first, have you got a bedroom? There are things I want to do to you that I can’t possibly do in front ofSofia.’
Charles’ insides burst into flames. ‘Yes, I have a bedroom.’
‘Cool. I’d like a tour of that.’
His parents being home, Charles double-locks his door and puts on some music. He barely has time to set the volume – muffling enough but acceptable under his roof – before Loris starts peeling off his clothes, kissing him as if the survival of the universe depended on it.
They fall naked onto the bed, and Charles sinks the back of his head into his pillow, clenching the sheet. Loris is already running his tongue down his chest and his hand between his legs, strewing the lampshades shadows with flickering fairy lights.
Soon, Charles fears the music isn’t loud enough, finding himself incapable of foreseeing his reactions to keep them quiet. But he would rather lose everything he possesses than interrupt Loris. The way hetouches or sucks his flesh in the most intimate places beats all the experiences Charles could afford.
And a minute later, Loris begins playing the final movement, his stubble scratching Charles’ skin on the inside of his thigh, and every concrete thought Charles could still form flies out of the room, the house and the terrestrial atmosphere.
‘Can I ask you a question?’
‘Always,’ Loris murmurs, still lying on top of Charles, his hand rubbing comforting shapes against his hip.
‘You’re gay, aren’t you?’
‘What gave me away?’
Charles covers Loris’ smirk with his palm and pushes him until he falls next to him on the mattress. ‘You could be bi or… something else...’
‘Something else?’
‘Please don’t mock my ignorance.’
Loris makes a tight knot of their legs. ‘I’m very gay.’
‘Have you always known?’
‘I understood when I was thirteen, but I suppressed it, because even at my age and rugby level, the macho atmosphere in the locker room was a real turn-off. So I did. I turned it off. Until my knees dumped me. I had to give up on who I thought I was gonna be, so I stopped fighting who I was.’
‘Just like that?’
‘No, it was one hell of a psychological journey. It took me so long to come out to my mum, even if she’s the most open-minded person in the world. I waited until I had someone to tell her about. It made me feel more valid, as stupid as it sounds now.’
‘Someone you had a crush on? Or a boyfriend?’
‘You want to bring my exes into your bedroom?’
‘Hmm… No.’
Charles squints away the vision of a teenage-Enzo and tucks his face between Loris’ chin and chest. The flavour of his skin is unmatched. It should be added to every cocktail and every pie.
‘Hey, what’s your father’s issue with my jacket?’
‘It’s too flashy. The Ledwells should only stand out through their achievements. Whatever. Why are you bringinghiminto my room?’
‘I’m raising the subject in case you want to tell me about—’
