Chapter 26
Ryan
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The minute I woke up in the morning and saw Brooke was gone, I knew in my heart something was wrong.
I even knew what that something was.
It was last night. Last night felt different and it must have freaked her out.
Last night was filled with love. I didn’t need to take a course to know that, but getting to know her the way I had over the last few months helped me understand her more.
And myself.
I never wanted to admit it even to myself, but I’d never felt that way about anyone. That wasn’t me lessening what I’d had with Olivia in any way; it was just me acknowledging the truth.
People talked about soul mates and finding that one person. I was lucky to have found love twice, but finding it and keeping it were two different things. Now I didn’t know what to do.
I went to work and came home early because I knew what time Brooke would be done with Sally. She came back a little after that time and looked thrown off when she saw me sitting on her porch. I normally went inside the house, but I got the feeling I should stay outside today.
“Ryan.” She sighed, looking at me with huge sad eyes that were puffy like she’d been crying.
“You left last night,” I began, standing when she walked up the steps.
She opened her mouth to answer but no words came out.
“Tell me something,” I began.
“What?” she looked worried.
“If I went to LA to see you, would you freak out?” I would go. If she agreed, I would go and make this work. Aria would be going to college next year, and that would leave me to myself.
At first a look of surprise filled her face, but then it was replaced with fear.
“It would make me crazy.”
“So you would freak out?”
“Ryan…you shouldn’t want to come to LA to see me.” She shook her head.
“Why? Why wouldn’t I want to see you? Is it easy for you not to see me? You can do it, no problem? You can say goodbye to me just like that? You can say goodbye to Aria?”
“I will always be there for Aria when she needs me. All she has to do is call me.”
“But not me? I can’t see you?”
“It’s best you don’t.”
My heart broke just hearing that, and the backs of my eyes stung. “I’m sorry, I totally forgot—no strings attached, right?”
She looked away from me and a tear ran down her cheek.
I sighed and moved away from her before I started crying like a fool.
The last time I’d felt this empty had been when Olivia died.
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