“Inviting someone to a camp potluck isn’t inappropriate, Cleo. It’s a fucking camp for kids, not a sleazy nightclub. No one said anything had to happen. Plus,” she gestured behind me to the crowd of people milling about, “It’s casual. A chance to hang out without the pressure of all the bullshit.”
“Nothingcanhappen,” I stressed. I was choosing to ignore the rest because even though we may have been hosting a little party for the parents and the kids, there wasn’t a chance in hell I would get out of this night unscathed. It’s why I’d tried to avoid it altogether.
Lennox looked down and bit her lip. “But do you want it to?”
“Of course not,” I said, shaking my head. No, that would be insane. It would be crazy. Grady was a thing of my past, not a moment in my future. We’d had our chance, and it hadn’t worked out. Plus, he was married.
Married, married, married.
I hated the word. Hated everything it represented. But I especially hated it when thinking about Grady.
Lennox hummed but didn’t say anything else. Instead, she wrapped her arm around my shoulders and led me from the barn into the afternoon heat. Cook was at the chuckwagon dishing out grilled hamburgers and hot dogs to everyone in line as music filtered through the speakers of Bishop’s truck. Kids ran back and forth from table to table as parents chatted about their weeks. Everyone seemed to be having a great time.
Up ahead, I could see my parents by the wagon talking to Cook. Dad’s hand was tucked into the back pocket of Mom’s jeans, and she was leaning into him like he was the only thing keeping her up. Even as a kid, before I truly knew the meaning of love, I always admired their relationship. They loved each other like they were in some epic romance novel. It wasn’t always perfect. In fact, they were often messy, but their love never wavered. Not even when they fought like cats and dogs.
Sometimes I wondered what their secret was, how it was possible for two people who seemed so different to fit together so perfectly. Everyone always said opposites attract, but I didn’t believe that much. Grady and I had been opposites, so had Thomas and I. Neither of those relationships worked.
The reason Thomas and I broke apart had more to do with the abuse than our differences. If things hadn’t turned dark, I knew we would’ve still been married. We’d been content with one another, or at least, I had been. It was easy, convenient. Love had never been a factor in our marriage. After Grady and I broke up, I’d vowed not to seek it out again. I couldn’t let myself be hurt like that. Not by him. Not by anyone.
I needed to remember that vow.
“They look happy, don’t they?” Lennox said, pulling me tighter.
I smiled, though it felt weak. “They do,” I agreed. “It’s good to see them smile like this. The past year has been hard. I think it killed Dad not to do the clinic in June.”
“This was a good call, though.” She gestured around at the people around us. “Not just for what it added to the community, but for all of us. I think we’ve been so preoccupied with Dad’s heart and Josie’s pregnancy we forgot what it’s all about.”
There was a subtle upturn on Lennox’s lips as she scanned the scene in front of us. She was made for this life. Both of my sisters were. Of that, I had no doubt. It felt good knowing my parents could pass down their legacy to people who were worthy of it. I certainly wouldn’t know what to do with it, nor did I want it.
I bumped her shoulder. “You’re gonna run the shit out of this place someday.”
“Someday?” she asked. “I run the shit out of it now.”
We both laughed. “Bishop may disagree,” I said, nodding in the broody man’s direction. He was leaning up against the fenceline, talking to Lincoln, posture relaxed, even though I knew he’d been working his ass off in the heat all day.
Lennox smirked as Bishop glanced over at us, eyes narrowing at his fiancé’s expression. “Oh, he knows it, too. Although I let him take control in the bedroom. It’s so much more fun that way.”
“I swear to god, Lennox,” I muttered, shoving her out of her little daydream. “I don’t want to think about that!”
Lennox shrugged. “Might do you some good to submit a little sis. If only there was a very willing and eager participant.” She turned, tapping her lips with her pointer finger until she made a triumphant little sound. “Ooh, like that one!”
I turned in the direction she pointed and nearly stopped breathing at the sight.
Grady was stepping out of his old truck; the same one he’d had when we were kids. The paint was slightly more faded and chipped than it had been before. I could still remember the feel of the scratchy cloth interior against my bare skin after we made love, or the smell of the leather air freshener always hanging from the rearview mirror.
He was wearing a green, short-sleeved Henley that showcased the rippling muscles in his forearms, paired with jeans and boots. The fabric was tight around his shoulders in a way that l sent heat rushing to places I’d rather not think about. My body was not on the same page as my heart. If it were, I wouldn’t be in the unfortunate predicament I currently found myself.
Grady had always been in shape, but had leaned more on the tall and lanky side of the spectrum when we were kids. Now, his six-foot, three-inch frame had filled out with muscle, and I wasn’t mad about it. This version of him was all man, but I could still make out the features of the carefree boy I fell in love with nearly twenty years ago.
“Goddamn,” Lennox said, shaking her head. “He’s ten times hotter than your other ex.”
I jabbed her in the stomach. “Will you stop it? I can’t go down that road.”
She groaned beside. “My god, Cleo. Willyoustop it? Get out of your head and live a little.”
“He’s married?—”
“Have you asked him?”
