Gods, I was really trying to talk myself out of this, just like everything else.
How couldn’t I? It was Essie, after all, who was supposed to be sitting here, bonding with Gertie to walk in her footsteps. Essie was the perfect age to take over under Gertie’s not-so-strict tutelage. Not me, no matter how often the way Celeste bragged about her daughter had made me jealous. Envious. It all didn’t make sense in the grand scheme of things.
Imade no sense.
Yet here we were. Witches talking about stars and magic leading us to where we were meant to be. Now, that made no sense.
It also made all the sense in the universe.
“Take your time. There’s plenty of it, I sure hope, before I’m up among the stars and looking down. It’s your decision. But I made mine,” said Gertie with certain conviction.
To be that sure of anything made me stare at her.
She glanced down at my cup. “Are you really going to let that get cold?”
I huffed a laugh, taking another large sip, gulping most of it down in one go. Then, I took a deep breath.
Now Gertie was the amused one. “Relax. Life isn’t all that serious.”
She was the only one telling me that.
“Sleep well, Lu. Tomorrow is yet another day.” Gertie patted me one last time before standing.
Leaving the door cracked open, she retreated into the house. The light dimmed as she blew out each lit candle in her wake.
I stayed out in the sunroom for a while longer until the night took over fully. I could hear the birdhouses swaying in the brisk wind, and the screen door clicked shut before I turned the knob back inside.
I never thought of Gertie’s house as a gift to anyone who found it, though it certainly had been to me. From the moment I’d stepped inside the chaotic wonderland of a home, it’d called out and wrapped me up in a warmth that made me feel … at ease. Wanted. I didn’t want to leave.
Now, Gertie didn’t want me to either.
With careful footfalls, I trailed up the stairs, careful not to step where they creaked. I glanced once more back at the crescent moon–shaped stained glass above the front door, brighter in the darkness. I always saw it as ironic, the moon there. But Gertie had followed the stars.
This house was the moon. Steady. Always there to be seen when you looked up to the sky.
Nearing the end of the hall, I slipped inside the room I always used when I stayed at Gertie’s. The iron bed frame curved like vines. A thick patchwork quilt was folded on the bottom half of the sheets, which I slid into without switching on the light. Dim light from the night itself was enough to light my way. It passed through the sheer curtains that pooled around the curved window seat, which was what had first made me choose the space as mine.
Growing up, I’d always wanted a window seat. Like a damsel peering out onto her kingdom when she pulled her attention away from whatever book or challenge she had been working on inside. Deliberating.
Always deliberating.
Perhaps it was the exhaustion. Perhaps it was the knowledge in the very back of my mind that everything could be solved if I simply trusted myself for once in my life. Trusted Gertie and everyone else.
But even they could be wrong. And they didn’t have to stick around to see the wreckage.
8
“Well?”
I froze as I continued digging through my never-ending bag. It would be better called a pit. I really needed to get a different one that wasn’t falling apart from the inside out. The tiny holes in the lining created new dimensions. I glanced up at Vadika eating her small bag of salt and vinegar kettle chips across the table.
“Well?”
“You need to spill. Right now.”
I sighed. For some reason, I’d figured if there was anyone spared from the rumor mill, it would be my friend.
Then again, I’d thought I’d be spared from the rumor mill entirely, never as interesting. And technically, I still wasn’t until my name was attached to the great Ryan Gardner.
