‘Well, it looks like your friend Rosemarie got what she came for.’ He grinned, changing the subject.
‘Kind of does, doesn’t it?’
Overall, in the grand scheme of things, today had been a win. Everybody was still alive – if not entirely unscathed – and given the usual waiting times in A&E, Rosemarie was likely to have a spectacularly long expanse of time to spend with Fergus. So, if that didn’t make or break them .?.?.
And what about Pete? She couldn’t keep hiding her true feelings like this, it felt all wrong. Could she ask about Tanya without sounding pushy or intrusive? Didn’t feel like it.
‘So .?.?. Pete, where are you going to stay tonight, the van or upstairs?’
She couldn’t imagine sleeping in that draughty, desolate space, even though it had been cleared.
‘I mean, how do you cope with the way things are at the moment? I’m not trying to be nosy or anything, but you’ve been used to luxury .?.?.’
He huffed. ‘That’s only in recent years. Before that it was pretty basic. Mam is a widow, so for years we were only scraping by. Believe me, I’m well used to the cold.’
‘You can tell me about it .?.?. if you don’t mind.’
Pete glanced up at her, maybe to see if she was sincere. He doesn’t talk much about this, she realised.
‘I wouldn’t want to bore you .?.?.’
‘You wouldn’t, honestly.’ Quite the opposite – Ally wasfascinated to hear his story.
‘I grew up in a little house in a place called Alsmead, I’m sure you’ve heard of it .?.?. near Castleblaney,’ he explained. ‘The arse-end of nowhere, up near the border. My father worked for the County Council, liked a drink, though I’ve seen worse, and .?.?. he was killed one night walking home from the pub.’
‘That’s awful, Pete. I’m so sorry to hear that. How old were you?’
‘Ten. I was the oldest of five, so Mammy relied on me to take over Da’s jobs and I just .?.?. got on with it.’
‘You make it sound like no big deal. But that’s so young .?.?.’
‘Sure, I knew no different. That night the Guards arrived at the front door and broke the news to us about my da .?.?. I stopped being a child.’
‘That’s awful.’
‘Naa .?.?. Sure, you just get on with it.’ He shrugged.
‘You keep saying that.’
‘Do I?’
‘You do.’ She felt him somewhere else, back in that cottage.
‘I built her a new house, though. At least that’s one thing I feel good about.’
‘Your mam?’
He nodded. ‘She’s everything she needs now, nice big bespoke kitchen .?.?. She was thrilled with that.’
‘You’re a good person, Pete. It’s a shame the world isn’t always so good.’
‘Isn’t that the truth. There are arseholes everywhere, and I’ve been one of them in my time. Not so much recently, though.’ He seemed to cheer up. ‘You’re the first person who’s asked me about that in .?.?. a very long time.’
‘It’s part of who you are.’
He looked up at her and exhaled. ‘Who I am .?.?. not what I have. Not everyone thinks of that.’
Again, Ally was having difficulty reading the situation – on the one hand, their connection felt so intimate, yet on the other, he felt unreachable. Suddenly, she felt overwhelmed with tiredness.
