“You’ll get one.” Joan waves her off and starts toward the door. At least her and Lisa get along great. I mean they were friends first, but it’s been an issue with women I’ve dated before. They didn’t like my relationship with Lisa, even though she has a boyfriend and I’m not remotely interested in her.
She pauses, and I follow after her. “I’m going to walk her out. I’ll be right back.”
“Yes, you will.” Lisa stares at me, daring me to not come back.
I open the door and motion for her to go ahead of me. Once we’re both on the porch and the door is shut behind us. I move my hand closer to hers. To my surprise she grabs it and we take the steps down toward her car. “I didn’t expect you to say anything to anyone.”
She loosens her hold on my hand and stops. “Was I not supposed to?”
Mere hours ago, I got her to agree to a date with me, and now I’m making her second guess herself. Stop. Saying. Stupid. Shit. Hmm. Maybe I should get that tattooed on myself to remember.
“No, it’s fine,” I squeeze her hand for reassurance. “I only thought you’d want to keep things quiet in case it didn’t work out.”
“Well, I mean people are going to see us there. It’s not like Asheville is a huge city where we can melt into the crowd.” She moves her feet toward her car again. “Besides, Lisa is both of our friends. If anyone is going to be dragged into the middle of whatever this is between us, it’s her. Besides, we’ll have to deal with all of it anyway if things don’t work out. I’m not quitting the bar. The tips are too good.”
She has a point. Dammit. No wonder people always tell you not to date where you work. But it’s okay. I’m not going to doom us before we’ve even had a chance to get started. “That makes sense.”
We’re in front of her car and she opens the door without getting in. “Even though I woke up with a massive hangover, I had a good time today. Thank you for that.”
“Well, I couldn’t exactly let you suffer now, could I?”
“You are just full of surprises.” She leans up on her toes and gives me a quick peck on the cheek. “I’ll text you when I get home.”
My hand instinctively goes to my cheek where her lips just were. She slides into the car and drives away. She’s also full of surprises.
“You’ve got some explaining to do.” I turn around and Lisa is staring at me and the look demands answers. Sometimes having her as a best friend is a pain in the ass.
10
Joan
The giddinessthat flows through me every time I get a text, or call, from Eric is almost ridiculous. I haven’t felt this way since me and my ex first started dating all those years ago. A small string of fear passes through my gut. What if I feel all those things, only to realize we make better friends like I did with Keith?
What makes it even more weird is the fact we still haven’t had a single date. That doesn’t happen until next weekend, and I’m already freaking out over what to wear. I don’t have any close girlfriends, aside from Lisa. I may need to get her advice because I can’t ask my kids. There’s no way in hell they need to know I’m going on a date. They won’t hear anything about him until it progresses past that. Because in the end, my children have to like and accept him as well.
Quit overthinking. It’s something I have to remind myself of anytime I get into this spiral. My brain goes from zero to ninety, coming up with all sorts of scenarios before they’ve happened.
“Mom,” Isaac taps my arm, “are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I glance over at him, “why?”
“You went from smiling to frowning over and over again.” He shrugs and turns his attention back to the movie we’re watching. Abby is hiding in her room on the phone with her friends because she doesn’t like action movies.
“No, I’m good. Just thinking about things.”
“If my baseball is too expensive, I can quit. I’m sure I’ll still get some scholarship opportunities through my school team.”
With those words, my heart breaks. It’s not something he should be thinking about. “You don’t have to worry about that. I’ve actually made enough tips at the bar that it’s covered this season and I’ve put some back for during the year if you aren’t playing other sports.”
Most people wouldn’t talk about money with their children. Hell, I don’t most of the time, but it’s good to be honest. If anything, maybe my kids will always have those open conversations if they decide to have families of their own. I can’t help but feel like a hypocrite at the same time. If I were being truly honest, I’d tell them about my date with Eric, but I’m not ready for that yet. Uncertainty at how they would react, or judgment they may pass at being with someone other than their dad, eats away at me.
“I haven’t decided yet.”
“Huh?”
He laughs. “Sports. I don’t know if I’m going to play the school ones in the fall. It depends how I’m feeling once it’s closer to the school year.”
“That makes sense,” I nod in agreement as a bomb goes off in the movie. “Just know I’ll support whatever you choose to do. And I can take care of baseball if you want to play in the fall.”
